OMG I think I've just decided I'm going to work towards moving house?!
Posting it in this topic as it is part of a transformation, a spiritual development I'm going through.
I've lived here for just over 10 yrs now and to be honest, I've never felt at home, that I belonged here in this village. Not even in this province, but certainly not this village.
Even someone from this area who had lived here for a few years moved away last month as she couldn't "land", didn't feel at home here in this village.
People here are odd. Not very easy nor open to share, be respectful to others (like their neighbours), it's just me, myself and I kind of mentality.
That's totally alien to me, people in the province I'm from are the opposite: warm, welcoming, open, friendly.
There are pros to staying here: lot of privacy, it's a semi-detached so only neighbours on 1 side. Bummer being that they're neighbours from hell.
Even their dog is ill-behaved and starts barking each and every time I set foot out my backdoor, their cat is a pain in the neck, harassing my cat that now sometimes daren't go out anymore and so on.
It seems to get worse and worse.
I've been trying to ignore it, to focus on the positives.
But now recently my mum moved to this area (not in this village) from 125kms away as she's getting older. I wanted her closer since she got unconscious and fell last year, lay on the floor for 1,5 hrs until the police battered down the front door.
In any case, that entire moving stuff from my mum got me thinking. It actually stirred things inside of me.
As it is I'm going through a huge process, that I've posted about under "energy work", and I think the time has simply come for me to get away from this village, to find a place that is more welcoming, where I can properly "be" and root etc. etc.
I don't even have friends anymore...
Funny thing is I was emptying my wardrobe a bit a month ago to make space, planning to sell some stuff.
And again in the back of my mind the thought rose that it'd help when moving house if i had less stuff.
It does scare me. A bit.
Then again, it's not like I'd be moving within a few months. I first would have to sift and sort through my stuff and get rid of an awful lot. It's likely I won't get another 3 bedroom house, plus this one has a large extension (as big as the living room).
So I will have to sell and/or dump much, not just close, some furniture too.
My settees can go for sure. I don't even use them, hihi.
And there's my drumkit... can I really say goodbye to it?
And there's fear of the financial part and physical part as I cannot do all that myself. I doubt I can even get packed by myself with my physical stuff and neck & head injury....
It does feel good though when I think of living somewhere else. No longer in this negative, not welcoming, certainly not matching energy!!
Maybe this staying here is making my body react in bad ways. My ailments are getting worse and worse you see.
And living here is like a constant uphill battle. Trying to enjoy it, relax etc. while it's just not possible.
Dang...
That sounds like I have indeed made up my mind.
What a process & transformation this is!
Linear Mode
