I'm a gay male

Haha, I appreciate all your kind words. And it makes sense. But I really think that our society has a lot to do with the way *people* are, not just based on our sexual affiliations.

The men I've tried to get close to are either too clingy, or too withdrawn (usually the latter). Straight people, generally, don't really understand that gay men and straight men have A LOT more in common emotionally than it seems. The difference is that gay men are more "buoyant" (haha) in their expressions of what goes on in their minds. But in their hearts, they are just as secretive as straight guys for the most part. Honestly though, I think it's our sick culture that makes us all sick inside. And I'm no exception.

For the most part though, it's true that women are the stronger of the sexes when it comes to solving a crisis. In certain Native American customs, it was the women, in fact the GRANDMOTHERS!!!! who gave the final "ok" for the tribe's men to go off to war. For me personally, that makes perfect sense.

Lol @ Psycho+God.

I agree in your thoughts that society has a lot to do with peoples behavior. People often base their behavior on models outside of themselves. I also believe its very hard for most people to break out of a cycle like that.

I love that you like matriarchal society. lol. Women can be great authority figures and older people too, for sure! I sometimes feel as though the elderly have been stripped of their value when it comes to offering wisdom and life lessons. Like, society doesn't value the gifts that come with old age.

Anyways... what exactly is it that men are being secretive about in there hearts???

[7luminaries]

Originally Posted by missrachel300

Lol @ Psycho+God.

I agree in your thoughts that society has a lot to do with peoples behavior. People often base their behavior on models outside of themselves. I also believe its very hard for most people to break out of a cycle like that.

I love that you like matriarchal society. lol. Women can be great authority figures and older people too, for sure! I sometimes feel as though the elderly have been stripped of their value when it comes to offering wisdom and life lessons. Like, society doesn't value the gifts that come with old age.

Anyways... what exactly is it that men are being secretive about in there hearts???

Hmmm...
Everything of importance, and a great deal of random stuff as well...
That is my guess anyway...

7L

Yup! As a female, I definitely won't argue with your theory that women should hold the reigns of authority over the world.

Perhaps its easier for you to get alone with women than men because we are most often than not, totally in touch with our emotional side whereas men might imply that other men who are in touch with that side are weak.

I'm the opposite. I'm straight but I have found that I enjoy the company of guys more because I have noticed they seem to be less drama than other women.

Originally Posted by LightofOurAge

Yep, I said it.

Thing is, I feel (and have always felt) more comfortable with straight people. Not that I feel totally comfortable with anyone, but let's not get too off the subject.

My question is....to the women primarily, why is it that I feel more at ease with women? Yes, I'm intune with my feminine side (I guess that's part of the DNA structuring of homosexual men) but I'm also very masculine on the outside, and I *feel* like a man on the inside who just happens to be more sensitive to certain things. I've never had a desire to cross-dress, and am repulsed by the idea (no offense to those so inclined), and I feel like I'm just a typical dude who happens to want another dude who's just as masculine and sensitive.

I'm in a strange limbo land. Most gay men I've found are either too one extreme, or too the other extreme. I'm in this strange balanced land that causes me to be lonely. I'm not "balanced" in all ways....in fact I'm very insecure in some areas. But I mean, I'm a 50/50 kind of guy with all my relationships, family, platonic, romantic, and sexual.

I feel MUCH more at ease with women....I think they seriously should hold the reigns of authority in this world. If only I was straight, I probably would have married long ago *sigh*. Anyway my point is, I've never felt comfortable with men, straight, bi, or gay. I think the nature of our society is the culprit.

This^ sounds so much like ME that if I didn't know better I'd think I wrote it! Light, we are in the same boat, brother! I understand everything you have said, to the T. I am struggling with balancing myself out, as well. I actually just took off of work today to go enroll in school and also went and turned in an application for what would be my first apartment. I'm 30 years old and have never left home, still live with my mother who doesn't want me to move out. At the same time I'm having a very difficult time with a straight male friend of mine; I adore this guy, but we have been having discord for about a year (which is probably going to end in us parting ways), and it all started with me getting emotionally/romantically attached and wanting to be with him sexually. I can say he is the best male friend I have had in life, but what is going on is a scenario that has played out in my life over and over again---not knowing how to relate to men without romance being involved. I mean, I get along fairly well with men who are not attractive to me, but I still can't say that I can relate to them in every aspect, because for one, I will never understand their (romantic/sexual) attraction to females. Now, I think women are beautiful, which is why I used to wish that I was born as one, and I feel much more at home with them. This might be because I was raised by my mother, who considered me her prized child, and my grandmother as well. My father was not in my life at all. I did, however, have brothers, one older one in particular who was close to me growing up; he's heterosexual and I think I got a lot of my masculine traits and male validation from him.

I do feel like a man on the inside and look like one on the outside. Most people who know I'm gay tell me that I was the last person they would've thought would be gay... and then some tell me that they figured it all along... I've always been very sensitive. I am sort of an enigma, and I'm constantly trying to figure myself out, so I have a tough time explaining myself to other people. It is nice to know that there are others like me, though.

[jenriggs]

I am a striaght woman and get along with men WAY more than woman. I don't think if has anything to do with your sexuality...I just get along better with men. I have only known a couple gay men, and yes, they were very feminin. Are you looking for someone such as yourself? Kind of a "not gay acting, but gay man"? If so...you are a rare and probably highly desirable gay man. Why don't you go on an online dating site and take your pick? I hope I am not offending you, but for other men, you would be highly desirable...but...the problem might be that the men that like you are feminine. Usually it involves a ying and a yang. Try going online.

Their is nothing wrong with being gay you should be proud your you!

I don't like females.

I truly find absolutely nothing of any value, any interest, any attractiveness, etc... about a person that is connected in any way to that person's body being female, at all. I will never really have an intimate interpersonal interaction (on any meaningful level) with females.

Sure, I can be socially polite with them. Out of sheer necessity in modern society, I have learned how to say and do what basically needs to be done when interacting with them in person to get though the inevitable daily encounters. But that's as deep as it ever can go for me: a purposefully pragmatic interaction totally based upon political correctness.

I don't like females (regardless of where they are on the continuum from girls to women) because I truly don't trust them at all.


Make no mistake: I don't hate females.
I simply and sincerely just don't like anything about them.


Needless to say, this means that the only relationships of any quality that I have in life are with males. Sure, just because they're male doesn't necessarily mean that those relationships always perfectly flow. But that's ok with me - I'm willing to work on how I resonate and harmonize with various dudes in my life, because I do like them. I find value in, I am interested in, I am attracted to, etc... people whose bodies are male.

Similarly, I find interactions easier (not meaningful, just easier) with females who express according to a masculine style. But I don't seek out such females to hang out. And I find men who express according to a feminine style to be a total turnoff, and very difficult to trust and relate with much at all.

I cannot be more honest about this than I just have been.

I am also a gay male, I get along with men and women the same. I never saw my sexuality as something that defined me. Since people can only reflect how we feel about ourselves, I only attracted those men and women who were okay with my sexuality. But in contrast, I would say I believe its all a personal preference. If you somehow lost the belief about you being less comfortable with men, your experience would instantly change.

Blessings

Nothing wrong with being gay............go for it..........

but women are too attractive to be gay...just sayin