Can we live in all 7 chakras

[Shivani Devi]

Thanks for that link there. I just read it and it's perfect! it describes everything I go through...everything!

[shivatar]

Perhaps not attachment to life, but a simple realization that you've come so far in this life that to let go of it would be a phenomenal waste of resources, and to simply go through the pain all over and hope for a different outcome (enlightenment instead of rebirth).

Maybe that is where your desire to live comes from. Some part of you recognizes you are spiritually wealthy in this life, some part of you has a lot of respect for how you've handled your experiences and doesn't want to give up on all the work it's done. It's not easy to survive bad situations and bring wisdom from them, a lifetime of doing that is like a life-time of gold finding. it's a fortune, but one we often fail to recognize until we are dead (hindsight is 20/20).

[shivatar]

Originally Posted by The Necromancer

Yes, I also realise that cancer is the next thing that's going to happen - if it hasn't already, but there's no way I am going to get this pain in my neck and difficulty swallowing seen to by a doctor...I blame smoking for it, which I have recently given up.

In my third eye I see a lot of life left in you. I doubt it's cancer.

I predict quite a few more years of misery for you old friend, haha. Perhaps even living to a ripe old age.

I know, what anguish, right? lol. It's not destined to be miserable though, if you work on finding comfort then you can live in comfort. If you deny your desires and comfort in the name of spirituality then how can you expect comfort if you've chosen to sacrifice it.

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by shivatar

In my third eye I see a lot of life left in you. I doubt it's cancer.

I predict quite a few more years of misery for you old friend, haha. Perhaps even living to a ripe old age.

I know, what anguish, right? lol.

Thank you and I also feel you are right, because you have nailed my illness perfectly and why I am going through this. Nobody has really done that before. My spirit and body have been at war for ages and that link is the best one I have seen yet.

Imagine having an illness that can strike anywhere in your body and totally mimic every other illness out there...this is what I go through on a constant, regular and daily basis - it may just be my 'throat's turn' and my 'left arm's turn' this week around. Next week it may strike my gall bladder again, or my heart, or my blood pressure will fall through the floor, or my right leg will totally collapse with no movement, or I'll black out and spend like 3 days in bed, fully asleep for three days straight...this is what it is like and it's so bloody annoying...but nobody can do anything about it really and I have to just learn to put up with it.

What is it they say? "only the good die young". lol

[shivatar]

Or they never lived long enough to prove they are as rotten as the rest of us. hahaha



The way I explain what you're going through is in terms of brain components. Sometimes if we live in one state of being for long enough our brain will change to match that state. For me living in a state of fear caused the part of my brain that deals with fear, anxiey, and worry to grow very very big. I never looked at a scan of it, but based off my actions and life I can tell that it's abnormally big. Small things are blown out of proportion by my brain, and my brain got to how it is after years of suffering.

Some wounds of the mind are invisible so they are not easy to recognize. For me I had a wound for 20 years and it was left untreated, naturally it festered and infected me with MANY sufferings. It was that wound being left untreated for 20 years that caused my amygdala to grow. A consequence of that is that now everything feels VERY VERY full of fear to me. I'm afraid to go outside, to work, to be social, everything is fear on steroids to me. I get one ache in my leg and I worry it's broken forever. I get one caught and my brain convinces me it's bronchitis or pnuemonia.

Knowing that my brain processes reality a little abnormally, I treat my thoughts and actions a little abnormally so I can live a normal life. When I do the things that I naturally want to do not much good comes from it. I sit in isolation, I avoid work, I avoid family and friends. When I do the things I don't like then my life turns much better. I don't like work but when I do I earn money and have material safety.

it's like knowing that my brain is abnormal means I'll never get to live the life I want. Because I don't even want to live at all. I want to crawl into a hole and die. ermmm, I mean crawl into a cave and meditate until I die. haha. What I mean is I won't ever find a life that is totally pleasing to me by listening to my brain, body, instincts, etc, because those assets are compromised. It's only through a process of trial and error that I find which part of myself to listen to so I can live a semi-normal life, a life free from self-sabotage, illness, poverty, etc.

It's weird not being able to listen to myself for guidance. It's like who do I look to then? But that's the situation, my body has become an unreliable servant so I rely on the wisdom of others, myself, the universe, I rely on everything instead of just myself.


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If you decide that the same thing is happening to you, the only way to live in my opinion is to match the challenges of the brain.

If everything is full of fear, I can live in isolation in my room and beat fear that way. Or I can face fear everyday and find courage everyday until I mostly feel courage and confidence when I leave my room, rather than fear.

As for the pains and the psychological or neurological stuff, a healthy dose of pessimism is what helps me. I'll hear my brain say "ohh, did you hear that ache and pop, that must be super bad chronic pain! lets worry and do something about it!" and I tell my brain "noooo, it's just a little bit of pain, it's very normal for someone who works like I do". And if my brain doesn't listen to me I'll ask other people, "hey, do you get sore after work sometimes" and they'll usually say "oh yeah, all the time". Then I tell that voice in my head "see, I told you! now shut up and leave me be".

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by shivatar

If you deny your desires and comfort in the name of spirituality then how can you expect comfort if you've chosen to sacrifice it.

It's not that though.

It's more like I have a total disconnect with the external, with others of my kind, so it is starting to affect my own body thus and I am getting 'disconnected' from it too.

It actually is a whole mix of about a dozen different things all piled on top of each other - a mountain of woes it will take a while to get to the bottom of:

Pseudoneurological symptoms, going through menopause, giving up a half ounce per week weed habit, being on the autism spectrum, having clinical depression, fibromyalgia, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome...it's a wonder I'm just not in fetal position sucking my thumb...

My life is a ball of agony from go to woe.

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by shivatar

Or they never lived long enough to prove they are as rotten as the rest of us. hahaha



The way I explain what you're going through is in terms of brain components. Sometimes if we live in one state of being for long enough our brain will change to match that state. For me living in a state of fear caused the part of my brain that deals with fear, anxiey, and worry to grow very very big. I never looked at a scan of it, but based off my actions and life I can tell that it's abnormally big. Small things are blown out of proportion by my brain, and my brain got to how it is after years of suffering.

Some wounds of the mind are invisible so they are not easy to recognize. For me I had a wound for 20 years and it was left untreated, naturally it festered and infected me with MANY sufferings. It was that wound being left untreated for 20 years that caused my amygdala to grow. A consequence of that is that now everything feels VERY VERY full of fear to me. I'm afraid to go outside, to work, to be social, everything is fear on steroids to me. I get one ache in my leg and I worry it's broken forever. I get one caught and my brain convinces me it's bronchitis or pnuemonia.



---


If you decide that the same thing is happening to you, the only way to live in my opinion is to match the challenges of the brain.

If everything is full of fear, I can live in isolation in my room and beat fear that way. Or I can face fear everyday and find courage everyday until I mostly feel courage and confidence when I leave my room, rather than fear.

As for the pains and the psychological or neurological stuff, a healthy dose of pessimism is what helps me. I'll hear my brain say "ohh, did you hear that ache and pop, that must be super bad chronic pain! lets worry and do something about it!" and I tell my brain "noooo, it's just a little bit of pain, it's very normal for someone who works like I do". And if my brain doesn't listen to me I'll ask other people, "hey, do you get sore after work sometimes" and they'll usually say "oh yeah, all the time". Then I tell that voice in my head "see, I told you! now shut up and leave me be".

Yep, I also have panic disorder too.

A headache is a 'stroke' and chest pain is a 'heart attack' and throat pain is 'cancer'...I know all of those feelings of fear as well, but what is it if not the fear of death itself?

I mean, if we weren't afraid of the 'big bad' we'd just go and say "take me now and see if I care" - right?

To tell the truth, that is what pulls me back from the total submergence into the void of endless pitch - I don't want to die because I don't know what is beyond that. So I start chanting Shiva mantras so if I die, I will go to Shiva and if I still live, I'll go to Shiva.

As for that sore neck muscles and glands in throat thing...like a swollen thyroid thing...

Today, 4 people told me they had that from a week before Christmas until now - my health nurse, her son, my sister in law and a neighbour. Stiff, sore, aching neck and throat...back and front...all the glands up, feels like a lump is there...can't swallow or breathe...pain behind breast bone and coughing...gagging and feeling like they are being choked....they've had it for almost 3 weeks now. It must be some weird virus thing that likes to focus on attacking necks.

[shivatar]

I often go back and forth between knowing myself through my illnesses and as the conquerer of my illnesses.

On a bad day I'll be like "I have bi polar".

On a good day I'll know myself as "the one who is conquering the bi polar". I am the light that shines through the bi polar lense. it would be nice if my personality wasn't distorted by this less than perfect brain of mine, but oh well I still have the strength in me to correct this problem. And thank god for that belief because science just says "nope, incurable, you're stuck with bi polar forever". It may be true but I won't always know myself as the victim, one day I'll know myself as the conquerer.

When I've come to know myself through my illness/es it doesn't matter that I have them anymore. I've found my deeper self through my illnesses and that is a prize more valuable than all the pain they've brought to me along the journey.

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What I mean is if I'm here for liberation and to know myself, it doesn't matter to me if I take the high road to liberation or the low road. I would like a life full of peaceful meditation, flowers, companionship, the good life is what I'd like but what I have is the poor one. Misery, anguish, illusion, suffering, isolation, blah blah blahhhh, I have it all and it's very bad. But in the end I'm learning to discern what it me from what is life, and someday it won't matter to me if I've lived the most painful life in existence or not because I found my self through that life, and that is a prize worth more pain than the world can offer me.

it does take effort though. Suffering doesn't bring spirituality, it inspires us to bring it about through it's sheer ugliness. How can we avoid spirituality once we have known suffering? How can we avoid enlightenment when we have known great suffering?

[shivatar]

Originally Posted by The Necromancer

Yep, I also have panic disorder too.

A headache is a 'stroke' and chest pain is a 'heart attack' and throat pain is 'cancer'...I know all of those feelings of fear as well, but what is it if not the fear of death itself?

I mean, if we weren't afraid of the 'big bad' we'd just go and say "take me now and see if I care" - right?

To tell the truth, that is what pulls me back from the total submergence into the void of endless pitch - I don't want to die because I don't know what is beyond that. So I start chanting Shiva mantras so if I die, I will go to Shiva and if I still live, I'll go to Shiva.

As for that sore neck muscles and glands in throat thing...like a swollen thyroid thing...

Today, 4 people told me they had that from a week before Christmas until now - my health nurse, her son, my sister in law and a neighbour. Stiff, sore, aching neck and throat...back and front...all the glands up, feels like a lump is there...can't swallow or breathe...pain behind breast bone and coughing...gagging and feeling like they are being choked....they've had it for almost 3 weeks now. It must be some weird virus thing that likes to focus on attacking necks.

'tis the season, for colds and flu. lol

3 weeks sounds like a long time though

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by shivatar

'tis the season, for colds and flu. lol

3 weeks sounds like a long time though

Yeah it does. Maybe my throat is just totally dried out and it's going to take a while to rehydrate it.

It may be the season for colds and flu where you live.