Heard from him

[DaisySunshine]

After nearly 6 weeks of being ignored I got a text from my twin.

He said what he did goes against his values and feels he messed up too bad to ask me to be his friend. He apologized and said he can only pray I can forgive him. He said he loves the girl he is dating and she is the one he wants to be with, and his feelings for me were too strong. He also said he needed space because even though I have some very difficult things I'm going through right now, he felt as though they were happening to him too and it was stressing him out and scaring him to death.

Anyway. I asked him what he truly wanted. He said to be my friend. I told him I always thought we made good friends but need clear boundaries to be healthy. He agreed, and said he is busy this week with projects but will think on it next week about how we could make being friends healthy for us both.

I found that after him being gone for almost 6 weeks, I feel less intense towards him. I wouldn't say I have any negative feelings about him, but I don't feel a sense of desperation and need. I know I can be just fine on my own without him in my life. I don't *need* him in order to be the person I want and succeed at life. I don't say this in a bitter or passive way, I just noticed it when we talked. I expected my obsessive feelings to come back but they didn't.

I'm thinking about what boundaries we would need. Yes there are obvious flirtatious things, but I crave deep friendships in life, and I don't know yet if the boundaries best for him take away what I desire in friendships, and if so, would that work for me?

I'm not asking anyone here to tell me what to do, I can do that on my own. I just wanted to share and also am open to thoughts or comments from others.

In all the relationships I've had in my life nothing has been like this one.