I'm not seeing this twin flame stuff

[Aloneyetnot]

I actually love posts like this - ones that drive conversation and share a different perspective. Thank you for posting! More conversations like this need to happen. Truly, we only know what we as individuals have experienced. In a way, we are all sort of "entitled" to our own experiences.

As for myself, I will say that I tend to be a "realist". In many ways, I viewed things in black and white. I have learned more about "gray". Prior to my experience, I would have scoffed at the idea of Twin Flames. I'd never make fun of anyone or be mean about it, but somewhere in my mind I'd be thinking, "Really? People believe this? How is this even a thing?"

The Universe then knocked me on my bottom and showed me otherwise.

We only know what we have experienced.

It's like many things - parenting being one of them. One doesn't truly "get it" until they are there in the action and actuality of it.

[linen53]

What I've noticed is in the Twin Flame section is that most that do post about this or the next twin flame are actually very young people who have not explored their inner selves or gained much confidence yet.

Now I'm not saying there aren't more mature twin flamers out there, but in my humble opinion, I get the impression most are very young.

I've even read some claim this one is their twin flame and then next month that one has been replaced by their current twin flame.

The term twin flame is so romanticized. Like us who are, hurhumph, older used to fantasize about our knight in shining armor who would sweep us off our feet. It's the same, only different in my eyes.

For me. No I don't have a twin flame. I found the man I married the old fashioned way with no whistles and bells attached. And we worked hard to make our marriage work.

Originally Posted by FallingLeaves

as i've said man times before, the problem for me with such statements is that I lived 25 years with the twin flame experience before I even knew that it was a problem others faced as well, let alone that there was a convenient name for it. So when I ran across the name it wasn't as a convenient belief to buy, it was as finally finding a description for very real experiences that before than had just existed in kind of a void.

But I guess you won't listen to me THIS time either. Because like everyone else, you have your own beliefs but yours are written to discount this whole experience as being merely a belief.

No need to listen. What you say is good for you. It's a belief. Or a set of beliefs that conform to certain spiritual criteria.
Now I implore you to listen: I likewise have conceded several times that relationships conforming to one or another twin flame doctrinaire are possible but are pretty rare.

Once again I iterate that enduring and fulfilling lifelong relationships exist for millions of couples who have never been near the kind of spirituality generally offered up on this forum and who have never heard of twin flamery. But they're happy, inseparable, as one totally embedded in each other's lives.

Linen53 sums it up well.
.

[selene]

Originally Posted by Lorelyen

No need to listen. What you say is good for you. It's a belief. Or a set of beliefs that conform to certain spiritual criteria.
Now I implore you to listen: I likewise have conceded several times that relationships conforming to one or another twin flame doctrinaire are possible but are pretty rare.

Once again I iterate that enduring and fulfilling lifelong relationships exist for millions of couples who have never been near the kind of spirituality generally offered up on this forum and who have never heard of twin flamery. But they're happy, inseparable, as one totally embedded in each other's lives.

Linen53 sums it up well.
.

There are two problems with your opinions as expressed on the forums Lorelyen.

One is that, like in your previous post on this thread, you often use terms such as 'prey', 'victims' or 'stalking' when it comes to twin flames, which is pretty condescending, generalizing and irrelevant to the behavior of the majority of the people who contribute to the forums -there are the stalkerish posts, the ones that do not respect the other person's wishes, but this is not what most posts are about. Even if we consider these love stories ones of unrequited love, victimization of either part of the equation is, I believe, going too far for an experience you have not had yourself.

Second, I have pointed out many times over that romantic union is not a prerequisite for 'twin flames.' They may never get there. What they do get is a spiritual bond, which may not always translate to positive feelings, yet, contributes to a person's growth. Of course, I know that beautiful relationships that I will look up to can happen without twin flames ever coming up. In the same case, beautiful, powerful spiritual bonds can happen for people who are not romantically involved.

My twin flame bond is not just romantic, at least, it is not for me -as a matter of fact, I have at times over the last few years I have known my twin flame, lost my romantic interest in him. And I think this is the case for many people reading these forums, who may not write that much.

[kundalinikid]

I believe it is an error in logic to say that people that are interested in TF are essentially young and dumb.

God has never took the age of someone's body into account when revealing mysteries.

"6 Then said I, Ah, Lord God! behold, I cannot speak: for I am a child.
7 But the Lord said unto me, Say not, I am a child: for thou shalt go to all that I shall send thee, and whatsoever I command thee thou shalt speak.
8 Be not afraid of their faces: for I am with thee to deliver thee, saith the Lord."

[Anne]

Yes kundalinikid, I believe same.

Not all are young and dumb here. I agree with Lorelyen when she points out the marketing schemes/snake oil found on the internet - but I disagree with her calling TFs ‘stalkers’ and ‘prey’.

As an oldster (lol), I certainly respect and appreciate what linen53 writes, but at the same time I empathize with FallingLeaves. It’s taken much of my lifetime to understand telepathy, and synchronizations with one special person, regardless of relationship status. ..A rocky road for sure, and probably the main reason I read this section.

Originally Posted by Aloneyetnot

I actually love posts like this - ones that drive conversation and share a different perspective. Thank you for posting! More conversations like this need to happen. Truly, we only know what we as individuals have experienced. In a way, we are all sort of "entitled" to our own experiences.

As for myself, I will say that I tend to be a "realist". In many ways, I viewed things in black and white. I have learned more about "gray". Prior to my experience, I would have scoffed at the idea of Twin Flames. I'd never make fun of anyone or be mean about it, but somewhere in my mind I'd be thinking, "Really? People believe this? How is this even a thing?"

The Universe then knocked me on my bottom and showed me otherwise.

We only know what we have experienced.

It's like many things - parenting being one of them. One doesn't truly "get it" until they are there in the action and actuality of it.

Aloneyetnot, thank you for your post! I agree open discussion is better than keeping a lid on simmer.

[Ziusudra]

Originally Posted by Colorado

Before you get all excited, just hear me out.

Maybe I just have a different perception.

As I read through this message board, and occasionally I read this section...through your posts, I don't see any spiritual meaning or unions. What I see is people who lack self love...and maybe ( law of attraction) you guys and gals are attracted to partners like yourself.

So in a sense, I can see somebody being a spiritual twin, as they lack the same thing. I read about these runners and chasers...male and females deal with things differently. Males usually run away from love..if they lack self love. Females do the same...but they will Chase an emotionally unavailable male (some guys do this, too)

The roles that males and females play usually, brought up by traditional and societal standards, will often show the way people cope (females- emotionally, males- physically)

The females usually chase unavailable males...workaholics, narcissistics, abusers and substance abusers, ECT.

Men will usually focus on the more physical aspects...sex, money, drugs, alcohol, unavailable women ...married, uninterested, usually someone who is more intelligent, or has more money, harder worker, prestige, stronger family ties, mother figure, or much younger than themselves, ECT.

This isn't always the case, lots of men will get into relationship with somebody alot like themselves, too...which is usually dysfunctional.

And you all usually come to the same conclusion...in the end.
You need to work on yourselves, and love yourselves first.

And that's a long road to recovery.

In the meantime, you all want to be loved so desperately...by people who can't love you ...because they don't even know how to love themselves.

I'm going to go on a limb here, and say...most of it stems from childhood programmation. Abusive homes, abandonment issues, workaholic or unavailable parents, substance abuse in home, ECT. Overall lack of love and guidance.

Subconsciously...you are attracted to someone...who is mirroring the way your mother's and father's treated you.

And most of you...wouldn't be happy if your "twin flame" did live you and treated you right because it wouldn't align with your own idea of what is attractive... unavailable men, drama, self sabotage, abuse, cheating, lies, ECT.

That's why, imo...you are chasing these unavailable men and women ...cause they can deliver on that, except they are tied up with causing someone else emotional and mental pain.

Everybody needs to heal...you can't give what you don't got.

I think though, there are glimpses of hope.

I'm a firm believer in energy, vibrations, and the spirit.

I see, or read about your spiritual experiences..with these people, dreams, synchronicity, ECT.

You are capable of loving yourselves...because you are raising your vibrations to have these experiences...you are capable of healing...if you are having these experiences because those higher vibrations are divine vibrations. That's when it's easiest to have these experiences...and you can, because you are made in the image of God.

And once you heal...you are not going to want an unavailable man or woman, a cheater, a liar, abuser, ECT.

No, you are going to want someone on your level, someone like you. And then, you will know that you love yourself..and that you have scars, but you are saved by grace and God...and yoy. you.

God just wants us to love ourselves, to see ourselves in his image...to love ourselves like God does. To know our own self worth.

You can't heal from an abuser, if you can ..you are doing it the hard way. You go to a counselor, doctor, therapist when you are sick....not to an alcoholic, abuser, liar, thief, murderer, ECT.

COLORADO,

This is a great advice if one is looking for a romantic relationship that has a potential to become a life partnership- that is healthy, functioning, loving, and mutually beneficial.
Your advice is right on the money, a common sense ..and no brainer for anybody.

I also agree with you that many of TF posters are about any of the followings:
1. Someone w/o self love suffering from a disfunctional and/or destructive attachment to an emotionally unavailable and/or physically unavailable/married person.
2. Two emotionally unavailable people dancing around a pseudo relationship that will never materialize.
3. A married person using TF as an excuse to cheat.
4. A person who does not have an emotional capability to pursue or to have a real relationship stalking someone emotionally, energetically, and/or even physically.
5. A delusional and/or narcissistic person seeking a unicorn relationship.
6. etc etc

HOWEVER, having said all that...

There are very few who truely seem to have a very deep soul connection with each other - beyond logical, psychological, and rational reasonings.

They share many past lives with that person and have a strong energy cords that can not be disconnected or detached permanently.
This is not about romantic feeling or romance seeking.
This is well pass all that human emotions.
It is an energy pull and soul connection.
Very different than a conventional relationship.
This involves astral space meetings and seem to have a shared plan/purpose (this is the hardest part to dissect and to figure out).

I don't expect you to understand it or to believe this experience, since I myself have rejected it for the first 20yrs. Even now, at time when it is very difficult, I want to not believe it.... because then maybe I can finally be free from this connection.
In fact, it will be much easier to live with and to accept a psychiatrict condition than this TF connection.

So, you see. I don't need anyone to validate or confirm the connection any more.
I am well pass that as well.
It is like this.... I don't need someone to tell me that I have two legs. I know that I do.
I don't need anyone to believe this connection since it is my own experience, not others.

Nonetheless, I like your advice on conventional romantic physical relationship. I personally give the same advice to others who are seeking a healthy and loving relationship. I practice that myself as well.- for 3rd romantic relationship.

[Ziusudra]

......dup .... dup

[LibraIndigo]

Originally Posted by Ziusudra

COLORADO,

This is a great advice if one is looking for a romantic relationship that has a potential to become a life partnership- that is healthy, functioning, loving, and mutually beneficial.
Your advice is right on the money, a common sense ..and no brainer for anybody.

I also agree with you that many of TF posters are about any of the followings:
1. Someone w/o self love suffering from a disfunctional and/or destructive attachment to an emotionally unavailable and/or physically unavailable/married person.
2. Two emotionally unavailable people dancing around a pseudo relationship that will never materialize.
3. A married person using TF as an excuse to cheat.
4. A person who does not have an emotional capability to pursue or to have a real relationship stalking someone emotionally, energetically, and/or even physically.
5. A delusional and/or narcissistic person seeking a unicorn relationship.
6. etc etc

HOWEVER, having said all that...

There are very few who truely seem to have a very deep soul connection with each other - beyond logical, psychological, and rational reasonings.

They share many past lives with that person and have a strong energy cords that can not be disconnected or detached permanently.
This is not about romantic feeling or romance seeking.
This is well pass all that human emotions.
It is an energy pull and soul connection.
Very different than a conventional relationship.
This involves astral space meetings and seem to have a shared plan/purpose (this is the hardest part to dissect and to figure out).

I don't expect you to understand it or to believe this experience, since I myself have rejected it for the first 20yrs. Even now, at time when it is very difficult, I want to not believe it.... because then maybe I can finally be free from this connection.
In fact, it will be much easier to live with and to accept a psychiatrict condition than this TF connection.

So, you see. I don't need anyone to validate or confirm the connection any more.
I am well pass that as well.
It is like this.... I don't need someone to tell me that I have two legs. I know that I do.
I don't need anyone to believe this connection since it is my own experience, not others.

Nonetheless, I like your advice on conventional romantic physical relationship. I personally give the same advice to others who are seeking a healthy and loving relationship. I practice that myself as well.- for 3rd romantic relationship.

[Blue Tiger]

Originally Posted by Ziusudra

COLORADO,

I also agree with you that many of TF posters are about any of the followings:
1. Someone w/o self love suffering from a disfunctional and/or destructive attachment to an emotionally unavailable and/or physically unavailable/married person.
2. Two emotionally unavailable people dancing around a pseudo relationship that will never materialize.
3. A married person using TF as an excuse to cheat.
4. A person who does not have an emotional capability to pursue or to have a real relationship stalking someone emotionally, energetically, and/or even physically.
5. A delusional and/or narcissistic person seeking a unicorn relationship.
6. etc etc

I wholeheartedly agree with you. There are a few real relationships that could rightfully be called "Twin Flame."

But there are so many people who seem determined to FIND their Twin Flame or claim a person as their Twin Flame, or CHANGE someone to fit the Twin Flame mold. It cannot be healthy, for them or their intended partner.