Need... something... advice/opinions?

I'm hoping this is the right place to post for advice... I'm not in the best frame of mind right now, but I really feel the need to ask for advice/other's experiences and get some things off my chest, as badly as these things make me think of myself...
First things first, while I'm a loner by nature I do have some kind of desire to meet 'someone' under the surface, although I don't know why that is - it's like I feel complete yet not at the same time...
If someone does (rarely) express interest in me romantically I get very defensive and tend to just reject them, as usually A) they're not the kind of guys I'd go for anyway and B) they've only just met me and I feel nothing towards them.
On the other hand, I tend to fall for people who I later realise aren't/were never interested but I still try too hard. Every time. But I want to learn how to stop doing it. It makes me feel stupid at best!
I also get jealous easily and paranoid when I don't hear from 'whoever it is I like at the time' for a while. But it seems like if I do let them come to me instead of me going to them, they don't come at all...
I hope it's OK to bring up that I was also diagnosed with Asperger's about 12 years ago, but I'm still unsure to what extent it actually does affect me. I only found out about it a couple of years ago. I have some good friends but mostly I spend time on my own and don't want to mix with others for various reasons, which is probably partly why I can't handle it when I meet someone I 'like'.
Sorry this post was so long but I really needed to offload

[WhiteWarrior]

We could be twins in everything but gender.

Undeadweapon - big hugs

I don't really have any answers, but I wanted you to know that you are not alone. While this isn't a situation I have found myself in, it is something I live through my sister who could have written the above post (although I don't believe she has Aserbergers).

It makes me sad for her, because she is so loving and has so much to give - it just seems it doesn't work for her and I am not sure why.

We do have a complicated past and I think this affects her.

Perahps understanding yourself better, your true feelings, fears, desires as well as how Aspergers impacts on you may be a good start?

Anyway, I just wanted you to know your are not alone and wish you every happiness

Thanks for the replies, I appreciate it :) it is good to see that I’m not totally alone in this.
I was thinking of seeing someone about the Asperger's - since I found out about the diagnosis and looked it up, it has explained a lot but then I'm not even sure if I do have it since it was never discussed with me at the time.
I've never really talked to anyone about how I feel, apart from my best friend, because I just have so many thoughts twisting inside my head when I think about it all I never know where to start or how to bring it up... and I get so emotional/sad about the whole sorry mess that it gets difficult to talk anyway.
I find it hard knowing what to say to others in general and I think people find me inarticulate/boring. It is difficult to say what's in my head because a lot of it doesn't lend itself to being expressed in words.
I feel a bit better now I have got some of it out but I wonder if things will ever change for me. I know life is hard but I don’t want to feel this way any more. I told myself I was going to make changes this year but my inspiration has gone after what happened on Wednesday, when I screwed things up with my crush.