How Can I Heal Myself From Within?

Hello everybody, I am really struggling with something right now and any help and/or opinions from you all would be very much appreciated

There is somebody that I hate really bad right now and I can't seem to get this very negative feeling out of me in regards to this person. I know that what I just said might have sounded horrible but I am just being honest.
I would really like to know how I can heal myself from within...I want to get this strong, negative, hateful feeling out of me but I do not know how.

It seems like no matter what, it will not go away, the feeling is very strong and immense hate.

I know that hate is a very strong word but I know that it's the feeling that I feel for this person..

I really would like to help myself out of this negative bondage.

Please help anybody and everybody if you can.

Thank you in advance.

Peace and Love,

[innerlight]

You can't heal your negativity from you that you are facing until you heal the situation. As long as you hold on to hate you are holding onto unresolved feelings and issues between the two of you. Until you heal it you will not be able to get past the negativity.

That hatred you have for them is a chain that is bonding the two of you together. Until you remove that chain you will still be weighed down by them and the situation.

Originally Posted by innerlight

You can't heal your negativity from you that you are facing until you heal the situation. As long as you hold on to hate you are holding onto unresolved feelings and issues between the two of you. Until you heal it you will not be able to get past the negativity.

That hatred you have for them is a chain that is bonding the two of you together. Until you remove that chain you will still be weighed down by them and the situation.

Thank you for this Innerlight, you are right.

A part of me wants to try and reach out to this person again and apologize and ask for forgiveness for anything offensive that I have done because I know it is the mature and right thing to do ... but another part of me doesn't want to heal the situation because of my ego.

If I tried to heal the situation with this person, I don't think they would be very cooperative because the hate is mutual between me and this person..

I don't think this person would want to heal the situation..

But again, I agree with what you said and I thank you again for your reply.

[innerlight]

Originally Posted by NeedPeaceOfMind

Thank you for this Innerlight, you are right.

A part of me wants to try and reach out to this person again and apologize and ask for forgiveness for anything offensive that I have done because I know it is the mature and right thing to do ... but another part of me doesn't want to heal the situation because of my ego.

If I tried to heal the situation with this person, I don't think they would be very cooperative because the hate is mutual between me and this person..

I don't think this person would want to heal the situation..

But again, I agree with what you said and I thank you again for your reply.

Some people do not want to heal the situation because they want to hold onto the hate, or feel it was too painful to ever heal and move past it.

Lucky for us that does not prevent us from healing from the situation. We can heal ourselves and be free from it without them wanting to forgive us. We heal and be free and then they are held back from it while we move forward from it.

Originally Posted by innerlight

Some people do not want to heal the situation because they want to hold onto the hate, or feel it was too painful to ever heal and move past it.

Lucky for us that does not prevent us from healing from the situation. We can heal ourselves and be free from it without them wanting to forgive us. We heal and be free and then they are held back from it while we move forward from it.

Yes, as horrible as I know it is, you are right. I have to be honest. Part of me wants to hold on to the hate that I have for this person because this person betrayed me and lied to me..

What you say is true but my main concern is HOW? What steps do I take to heal myself from within about the situation?
Even if this person doesn't wish to forgive me, I want to be able to forgive them..

Well, part of me does out of all honesty. I don't like to walk around knowing that I have such strong negative feelings inside.

[innerlight]

Originally Posted by NeedPeaceOfMind

Yes, as horrible as I know it is, you are right. I have to be honest. Part of me wants to hold on to the hate that I have for this person because this person betrayed me and lied to me..

What you say is true but my main concern is HOW? What steps do I take to heal myself from within about the situation?
Even if this person doesn't wish to forgive me, I want to be able to forgive them..

Well, part of me does out of all honesty. I don't like to walk around knowing that I have such strong negative feelings inside.

The first step is the hardest one and is the one you are making right now. That is wanting to heal yourself.

The next step is to forgive them for everything they did. Forgiving does not mean you condone it or agree with it. It means you allow yourself to accept that it has happened. There is nothing you can do to change that. And allow yourself to move forward from it.

Forgiving most times is two fold we need to forgive them and we need to forgive ourselves. Usually for feeling we deserved it, or that we feel bad because we allowed it to happen and we allow ourselves to feel bad about it or even hating them.

The next step is letting it go from you. Once you are able to forgive you will find it easy to let go.

Originally Posted by innerlight

The first step is the hardest one and is the one you are making right now. That is wanting to heal yourself.

The next step is to forgive them for everything they did. Forgiving does not mean you condone it or agree with it. It means you allow yourself to accept that it has happened. There is nothing you can do to change that. And allow yourself to move forward from it.

Forgiving most times is two fold we need to forgive them and we need to forgive ourselves. Usually for feeling we deserved it, or that we feel bad because we allowed it to happen and we allow ourselves to feel bad about it or even hating them.

The next step is letting it go from you. Once you are able to forgive you will find it easy to let go.

To forgive is the most difficult step for me right now. I'm usually not one to hold grudges but I'm finding forgiving this in particular person especially difficult.

What this person did to me has been done to me before by someone else that I thought was my "friend" only in a different way..
To relive something horrible again through another person who you thought you could trust is very hard..

I know you are right though and I know it will only be a matter of time before I forget about the whole thing (at least that's what I'm hoping).

Acceptance is a big one as well that I think I need to work on. Accepting things for what they are and for what they were..

And don't even get me started on the letting go part lol. I can't seem to let go of the situation in itself right now which is what is causing all the negative feelings, I think.

Thank you for your replies to me, it helped a little bit just to read what you have to say

I believe this is how you heal from the inside in a situation like you described.

To begin with you might want to remember that you drew that person to you for a reason.

You may have been seriously hurt by that person but there is also a very important lesson within the relationship with that person.

Try stepping to one side away from the feelings of hate and take another look at the real situation.

Were you missing something, failing to see the warning signs? Has your attention been brought to something important that may help you or someone else?

Originally Posted by Maiya

I believe this is how you heal from the inside in a situation like you described.

To begin with you might want to remember that you drew that person to you for a reason.

You may have been seriously hurt by that person but there is also a very important lesson within the relationship with that person.

Try stepping to one side away from the feelings of hate and take another look at the real situation.

Were you missing something, failing to see the warning signs? Has your attention been brought to something important that may help you or someone else?

Very nice questions that you proposed, thank you.

I had a bit of a bad feeling about this person but it wasn't instant..

I always like to give people a chance though ... sometimes I can be paranoid but in this case, I learned that I wasn't just being paranoid.

My bad feelings about this person were right..

I like what you said about stepping to one side away from the feelings of hate and taking another look at the situation..

Honestly, I guess I can say that my attention was brought to at least one important thing about myself actually through contact with this person..

I just wish that it didn't happen the way it did.