Do you think that people are exempt from being toxic just "because they're family?"

[Native spirit]

I Was very shy when i was younger ridiculed because of my gifts.

When my dad passed my cousin came up to me, and said this is my brother

your first cousin, I didn't know him and he didn't know me,

and he wasn't the first either yet he knew my siblings


Namaste

[Altair]

Originally Posted by Starman

In my opinion “family” is much more than blood. Blood makes us related but trust and a connection makes us family. Maybe you are struggling with this because of your concept of “family.”

That's just a new definition of family, which makes the word ''family'' kinda pointless.

[Gem]

They like to loosen definitions of words including 'family' because it creates ambiguity which opens the door to saying things that have no bearing on reality.

There might be a family member who isn't trustworthy (usually there is), but you're stuck with it because they are family. You have a friend you trust with your life, but he isn't your family and he has his own mob. Family has nothing to do with trust.

If adopted, you can then say your family has no blood relation, but when we say 'we raised him as our own', we're talking about blood. Adoption is modeled after blood offspring. It's in lieu of 'your own children'. The adopted ones know that, so they tend to be curious about their own ancestry.

Ya gotta watch out because people will pretend they are your family, like your gang, or a cult, or that Twin Flame Universe thing etc. One cult I know of was literally called "The Family". It's not.

'Family' regards your bloodline. Even if they are a bag of rotters, you know they are your mob because you know who begat whom. You can even hate your parents, but they are your parents because birds and bees make it so.

I had a step father (deceased), but if my parents broke up, it's later gator to him. I'm with mum, and he'd go back his own mob. My siblings' exes were also 'part of the family' via marriage, but since the divorces I haven't seen them, and I don't want to see them!

The same-sex thing is only couples, not families, because procreation is male-female. They might adopt or something, but as I pointed out before, that is a child in lieu of the one that they can't have together. Their 'family' is modeled after how males and females make children. The male-female-child dynamic is primary reference for 'Family' simply because that's how nature works.

'Family' regards how males and females make brothers and sisters, and therefore aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents etc. The word 'family' refers something real in nature. We know how that works, and exceptions to the rule do not change the rule.

[Altair]

Yes, I agree with Gem here. There are other ways to mimic a 'family' but that's not what family means. Calling your best friends ''the family you choose'' is kinda nonsensical. It just means you're changing the meaning of the word. Why do that? Why is ''best friends'' not enough, why call it ''family'' if actual family is less important to you, or perhaps a disappointment? I mean.. just think about that for a sec. Why do you actually choose to call a friend your ''family''? Why not another word?

It's like saying you're an atheist but you just believe in 'God' anyway and turn it into something non-spiritual or something because you are attached to the word.

[Redchic12]

I see your point Altair and Gem. Good comments.

However, I do call my best mate of forty two years my “soul sister” cos it feels right to me. Actually Sparrow Guide kinda confirmed it for me.

But as you say, it’s only a word and whatever FEELS right with others is ok with me.

As for toxic. For me personally, you do not let them into your life whether family or not. But that’s just me.

[Altair]

Originally Posted by Redchic12

But as you say, it’s only a word and whatever FEELS right with others is ok with me.

My point is, why do some use the word if the word doesn't mean all that much to them to begin with? If someone has negative connotations with the word ''family'' because personal issues, then why keep using it affectionately to the point a good friend is viewed as ''family''? This makes no sense.

[NewShoes]

I love both of my brothers, they don't love me. I recognize that the whole thing is toxic, I just don't want to give up trying to get along with them. They get along with each other. I'm schizotypal which means I think a lot like a child might and I totally believe in magic but there is no compassion or empathy in my brothers. There is no excuse for the way we act to each other, they are toxic to me and they have to go. No exemptions even for family. It's a real shame.