Past life with current partner

Hi everyone!

I am new to this forum. Before anything else I would like to express my gratitude and thanks to you all, simply because of just being here and sharing our thoughts and experiences with each other.



I have recently taken Usui Reiki Level 1 after going to sessions with my Reiki Master for 3-4 years. It has honestly changed my life in the most positive and fulfilling way possible. My Reiki Master has the ability to see her clients' past lives. Each time I return to her she picks up the energy right away from my boyfriend -- writing 'boyfriend' here seems to be a word that does not fully describe our connection, which goes beyond all explanation, the connection is so deep. Once, my Master said we had lived together in Italy in our past lives together. He died in a war when he was 21.

The funny thing is that before she mentioned all this when we first met it was an instant connection and we always talked about going to Italy together and didn't know why. I don't have any kind of connection to Italy in this life and neither does he, and it wouldn't be the first place we would go to if we wanted to travel somewhere. Also he is very paranoid about people, i.e. overly paranoid, as if he is going to be attacked all the time, & it takes him a long time to trust people...same with me with the trust issues, except when he and I met it was...as I mentioned before, an unexplainable incredible connection. I said to him once, before I was told about our supposed past life together, that if he were to be in possession of a weapon it would only be because he HAD to -- in order to protect someone, as a duty -- and that I would feel very safe next to him because he would protect me from harm.

Now my Reiki Master also said that when he died at 21 in our past life together that he only went to war because he HAD to, because it was his duty. And that when he died, there was an emptiness inside of me that I could never fill. When she said this, it was like I was reliving the same feeling. My Master said we have karmic something-or-other and that we never got to live in our 60s and 80s, and that's what this life is for. It just gives me SHIVERS thinking about it!!

The whole story explains my patterns and habits in this life -- i.e. trying to find someone to be with, in order to find that same connection, but never having it work out...until, POOF! When I least expect it! The issue is that I ALWAYS think I am going to lose him again, I always think he is going to leave me because he will die again. It is a horrible thought, and something I can't bear. It is weighing on me.

Just wondering if any of you have suggestions on how I can embrace and appreciate that, out of all the chances in the world, we were able to meet again and that we can enjoy our time together to the absolute fullest instead of me always being reminded that he disappeared in our last life together and that horrible lonely feeling that accompanies it. He says he feels the same way too -- that whenever we are away from each other, even if it is just for a few days, we aren't at our full potentials because we want to be together.

Thanks for reading.

Namaste