well he must have felt something...

Originally Posted by BeautifulLife

I already answered your question. He's looking to get your attention by you noticing that he removed you as friends. He dropped the other people as friends as well just in case you didn't notice maybe one of them will and will tell you. It's been over a year of no contact so the ego on his side is too strong to contact you yet he's wondering if there are still feeling on your end and this is his attempt at trying to get a response out of you. Like you emailing him to ask him why he dropped you as a friend on FB. It's childish but than again I've done very similar things in the past and my TF has as well.

edit: beauty of what he did was since he removed other people as his friends you can have one of your mutal friends ask him why they were removed as a friend. You dont' even have to break contact with him to find out.

idk i guess my ego is still in the way. i just feel stupid contacting him after all this time, i don't want to look like "psycho ex" or something haha. i've already done alot of dumb things concerning this guy, but i guess that's how we are mirrors because we both have giant egos.

Originally Posted by BeautifulLife

The pain is caused by your EGO. It's your resistance and dissapointment that you can control the situation nor shut down your feelings for this person. The only way you'll find peace is by letting GO of your attempt to control this relationship either to bring you two together or to remove this person from your life completely. This is what is meant by "let it be". It's allowing the unvierse to control things even if its just for today.

Yes my friend I know it's ego at its best accepting the fact that despite all the love that is there between us it is not enough??? Is the hardest thing of all...he has said to me it's not about love it's about timing...that unquestionably the love he feels for me is beyond anything he has ever felt...but for me I've always been about putting love first so cannot comprehend walking away from something so intense...I know I need to accept and let go and perhaps that is the numbness I feel I'm almost done with humiliating myself further...I've just always been one that needs closure to move forward - there seems to be no closure here just a need to move on which I'm struggling with...

Originally Posted by Loving_Soul

I've just always been one that needs closure to move forward - there seems to be no closure here just a need to move on which I'm struggling with...

I'm with you there, girl. You have to learn to move foward when you don't have that ending. I kept asking for at least that, but still haven't gotten it after 2 years. It's hard. One thing I have learned with these type of SC relationships, there's no such thing as closure. You've just got to put one foot in front of the other.

Originally Posted by ShiningStar

I'm with you there, girl. You have to learn to move foward when you don't have that ending. I kept asking for at least that, but still haven't gotten it after 2 years. It's hard. One thing I have learned with these type of SC relationships, there's no such thing as closure. You've just got to put one foot in front of the other.

Lol well my last txt to him I think may be cutting my nose off to spite my face....I am overseas at the mo so no chance of doing much...but my last txt to him was that he knows me and that I will not happily fade away to oblivion in silence...I'm coming to see u when I return...at the point I wrote this I was all up for the showdown...sad angry hurt scared I didn't care what emotions came to light in the moment of meeting at least they would get released...I'm not sure if I should or will follow through with going to see him when I get back but my search for closure will probably propel me towards it...yes ego at its finest!!!!

[DARKEST_HOUR]

Originally Posted by MorningMist

@ Darkest_Hour: It's my feeling - and therefore highly subjective - that she loves you more than you realise and did, indeed, make those blocked calls to ensure you were still alive.

As your TF, she would have undoubtedly 'felt' your condition when you weren't well.

However, she almost seems like a version of me (as far as being a runner, I mean, but without the game playing), in that she has some growing to do before you reunite again. I feel no doubt at all that you will both reunite (hope so, at any rate).

My only heartfelt suggestion would be to continue as you are, don't take the bait or join in any more games with her, focus on you and your development, and leave the rest to spirit.

Listen to your heart.

Sometimes, things are never as dark as they seem - but it sure does feels like it.

Hugs
MorningMist

Thank you so much MorningMist, it's always good hearing feedback from you(especially since both of you seem like youre the same type of runner). Working on myself is all I can do right now really, and I believe I'm taking the right path..... as I feel I have awaken from this experience. I only hope that she's in the right path as well, either if we reunite or not. I'll always love her uncnditionally.

[DARKEST_HOUR]

Originally Posted by Loving_Soul

Thank you xxxx

Yes I know he will always love me I don't doubt it...my only choice is to turn away and leave him be...it's just so very hard when the image of him is everywhere I look - its like it is imprinted in my mindseye and everything I see he is there...it drives u insane when u are trying yr best just to let go!!

I definitely know just how you feel LS, and this is how we become "runners" as well, because our SC's dont leave us any other choice and it seems its all we can do....

[DARKEST_HOUR]

Originally Posted by BeautifulLife

There's a difference between running and turning your back on the connection. Do you really feel like you're moving further apart or just fighting the pull to get closer. I've found the connection is almost like a rubber band and the more I try to distance myself the more energy builds in the connection till it finally pulls me back in with all the force I had invested in trying to distance myself.

I will never turn my back on my SC as I have even said to her that I'll always be here for her...but its up to her if she wants to reach out to me or not. My mind knows this is all I can do for right now, which is why I hardly feel any pain any more...but she's still in my thoughts 24/7 so I'm assuming the connection is there in someway since its constantly reminding me. I guess since I've accepted things and am going with flow and letting the universe do what its intended to do the pain has lessened dramatically. But I dont know if the connection is fading or not...but what I do know is that she will always be in my heart and soul because shes a part of me. And something tells me if I were to see her face to face again I know that my heart and soul would melt all over again....

[DARKEST_HOUR]

Originally Posted by ShiningStar

I'm with you there, girl. You have to learn to move foward when you don't have that ending. I kept asking for at least that, but still haven't gotten it after 2 years. It's hard. One thing I have learned with these type of SC relationships, there's no such thing as closure. You've just got to put one foot in front of the other.

I completely agree with this 100%, you could not have said it any better...sometimes there is no closure because the other person doesnt want to let go either...

@all posts above. Bottom line is you will or won't do what is expected. Trust me. I've tried to free will myself in another direction many times only to find myself paralyzed and unable to change direction no matter how much I thought I was WRONG. If you can make a decission than it's the right one, period. if you do nothing than that's also a decission and the right thing to do for the moment. Have faith. Trust me there is nothing you can do wrong in this life, nothing. If you can actually act out the action than trust in the direction that you manifested since it was the right one.

Originally Posted by lennonsdoll

its been awhile since i have posted, as i am busy with school andtrying to "move on" from this crazy connection. well today i was looking on my facebook friend list and i noticed that my SC deleted me, my best friend, and any other mutual friend we may have had from facebook. i mean, its one thing to delete an ex, but to delete any mutual connections you may have had with that person? its almost like he deleted everything to do with me..idk if that sounds selfish, it probably does. but i just think its sort of telling, ya know? you guys may disagree with me. but he must have felt something toward me and is trying his hardest to escape it.

I have no idea why he did that, but usually when I have deleted facebook "friends" it has been because they and their friends have kept posting things that appear on my homepage that I don't really like there. Since, I have learned that I can simply unsuscribe. What he probably felt was annoyed.