A little advice needed

#1 01-10-2011, 05:33 AM

For years now, I've been practising on and off, sending loving energies out into the world, or transforming negative energies into positive energies for the betterment of others. I've even practised in sending color therapy to other people to help change their mood to something more positive. And usually it works very well. But when I tried doing that last week, I got an unexpected result.

Without going into all the details, my older sister and I have been going through a falling out over her using me for her own gain for a whole year. I really don't like all the negativity flying back and forth between us. Regardless of all that's transpired, she is still my sister. I just can't let her continue to get away with using me the way she had.

So, during the hour long drive to one of our accounts, I'd been sending her thoughts of unconditional love, peace and forgiveness. I usually try to get to that office early enough to lay down and take a short nap. As soon as I laid down, my sister popped up inside my head, and I heard her voice saying, "Just give it to me."

And the next week, I was told that my sister has all these plans to get me back for one of her accounts deciding to drop her and continue to use my services, after my sister fired me from her company.

Sadly, this isn't the first time my sister has burned her own family members, just to get what she wants. Hell, it's not even the second or third time.

I don't like all the negative emotions all this has been stirring up. But I don't like how she'd been effecting the survival of my family either. My kids and I go hungry almost every day and have been getting strangled with financial issues because she refuses to pay me what she promised, to get me to come work for her in the first place. For the past year, I'd been doing 90% to 99% of the work and only getting somewhere around 1/8 of the pay. I HAVE to get at least angry enough to do something about that, to prevent it from continuing. But I don't like all these negative feelings the entire situation has created.

I guess I just don't know how to keep enough of an inner peace, when my basic outer needs for survival are constantly threatened. And how do I try to keep enough peace between my sister and I, to get rid of all the negative build up, without letting her continue to use or cause further harm to me?

psychoslice · #2 01-10-2011, 06:33 AM

Just because she is your sister doesn't mean she can walk all over you, but then you yourself ain't no doormat so its about time you stop acting like one, tell her strait that you are not going to take her treating you like this any longer, forget about sending out lovely energy and all that for now and do something, for it takes energy to do also, use your energy constructively and move on, if need be, without your sister.

ROM · #3 01-10-2011, 06:59 AM

Resistance leads to more resistance. If you persist to resist, resistance will persist.

You already know what's causing this negativity. Now you need to confront it. Don't try to run away or suppress it, for it will only get worse. Sending out thoughts of love and peace will only work if the one intended for is open to it; otherwise, it's better to transmute those thoughts into words and actions. Be firm and resolute; don't let her control you.

astralsuzy · #4 01-10-2011, 07:02 AM

You have some good advice given to you.
It is not a good idea to mix business with family members as it can destroy relationships. What is done is done.
It is lovely of you to send out loving energy but sometimes we have to do more. We have to face up to what is being done and do something about it. Talk to your sister about it if you have not already and try to resolve it.

#5 01-10-2011, 07:41 AM

We have already parted ways. Several months ago when she first started threatening to fire me, I began the paperwork to start up my own business. One of her other clients was all ready to drop her and hire me, till she started making a ruckus about me stealing her clients. Things just seemed to go down hill from there and she did wind up firing me. But what pi**ed her off even more, was that one of her other higher paying clients chose to hire me. And there's a good possibility that I may eventually wind up with the other client who was going to hire me.

But all that is just pi**es her off to no end, that's she's now threatening to make anonymous calls to the agencies that regulate this line of work, as a way of trying to put me out of business. She's out for vengeance. Not only that, but she's in trouble with the IRS. And I wouldn't put it past her to try and use my SS# for fraudulent purposes.

Lightspirit · #6 01-10-2011, 08:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by astralsuzy

You have some good advice given to you.
It is not a good idea to mix business with family members as it can destroy relationships. What is done is done.
It is lovely of you to send out loving energy but sometimes we have to do more. We have to face up to what is being done and do something about it. Talk to your sister about it if you have not already and try to resolve it.

Exactly! Friends family whatever your always going to get people who value money over relationships.

A personal thing I do is I cull greedy or stingy people out of my life. There are people unfortunately who wil take from unwary contributors constantly to feather their own nests. Some people dont know how to give in return as they have received very well.

Surround yourself with genuine generous kind caring people if you can help it and also be that in return for other people. It makes a big difference. There are many on this forum I would call that type of people and for that reason I talk to them here. :)

astralsuzy · #7 01-10-2011, 08:53 AM

I feel for you for having that problem. That would be awful and stressful. I do not think there is anything you can do except try and stay away from her. Try not to worry about her threats as it may not happen. If she goes to the agencies she would have to have proof about what she is saying against you. If the agencies reject you then you could worry about it then and talk to them about it. It probably will not happen. If she uses your SS for fraudulent purposes then that will be a police matter.

#8 01-10-2011, 07:53 PM

Yeah, it's not a really good situation to be in. I feel like I'm playing a game of chess, awaiting her to make the next move just to see what she does. While I do have plenty of good moves left that could burn her worse then what she's trying to do to me, I just really don't want to be the kind of person who would still do something like that, even if better options were available. I don't want to resort to nastiness in a bad situation, where nastiness is already at play. I just want to move forward and continue on with my life. It's just that sometimes, all the negative emotions that have erupted out of all this junk, gets hard to shake off.

Xan · #9 02-10-2011, 01:31 AM

Trieah... If it were me I would keep it simple and get another job.

Xan

Silver · #10 02-10-2011, 01:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trieah

We have already parted ways. Several months ago when she first started threatening to fire me, I began the paperwork to start up my own business. One of her other clients was all ready to drop her and hire me, till she started making a ruckus about me stealing her clients. Things just seemed to go down hill from there and she did wind up firing me. But what pi**ed her off even more, was that one of her other higher paying clients chose to hire me. And there's a good possibility that I may eventually wind up with the other client who was going to hire me.

But all that is just pi**es her off to no end, that's she's now threatening to make anonymous calls to the agencies that regulate this line of work, as a way of trying to put me out of business. She's out for vengeance. Not only that, but she's in trouble with the IRS. And I wouldn't put it past her to try and use my SS# for fraudulent purposes.

Her threats to make calls may or may not hold any water. I may not know what line of business you are in, but I don't think there's a lot they can practically do with anonymous calls with nothing to back it up. She's just throwing shadows at you, because she's mad. You can do a lot. You can hold your head up and know that the clients chose you over her and just remember that, and that if clients somehow get wind of trouble if you haven't already told them, you can tell them briefly and matter-of-factly what is happening. I've heard of special services that can watch out for identity theft but at least you're aware of that possibility but once again, she may only be blowing smoke because she's upset. I wish you luck.