Soul connection & Marriage

[SomewhereInTime]

Originally Posted by BeautifulLife

Tell me about it...During my honeymoon I finally got to talk to her on the phone for an hour. She had been avoiding talking to me on the phone both when I initially contacted her months before my wedding as well as the week before my wedding when she finally admitted she still had feelings for me. She'd agree to talk to me only to not pick up when I called her phone, LOL. So finally I got a chance to talk to her on the phone and everything I had felt about her was instantly validate. I could hear it in her voice both the love and fear. I described to her what I was going through as well as the TF concept and she replied "I think I am your TF...I have been running. I was insecure and didn't feel you could love me like you loved your gf and I never believed you that you'd ever leave her".

After that phone call a day goes by and she goes back to her old ways. Refusing to talk to me on the phone again and emailing me that she doesn't have any feelings for me and to "Forget everything I said, I was caught up in the moment" and that I should just forget about her. A month later she meets a new guy, moves in with him a few months after than and a year later is engaged.....LOL

Totally understand the fear & insecurity parts, lol.

It makes you wonder if these other relationships that are entered into are simply trying to fill that void while ignoring what is right in front of you. In doing that, I believe there will always be that emptiness and that cycle.

Originally Posted by SomewhereInTime

Totally understand the fear & insecurity parts, lol.

It makes you wonder if these other relationships that are entered into are simply trying to fill that void while ignoring what is right in front of you. In doing that, I believe there will always be that emptiness and that cycle.

Yup, it's a lesson they need to experience in order to grow. My TF clearly didn't understand how I could get married if I truly loved her. "True love wouldn't marry someone else" Now she gets to walk in my shoes to gain that insight. Before I got married she told me this

"To be completely objective you have three choices, you tell her about me and you and that youre still inlove with me, you break it off and tell her youre not ready or you get married and regret it after"

Hopefully, she'll listen to her own advice

[Impulsv]

Ok I posted this link because it was an important explanation about living your truth and meeting ur twin when married. it was insightful.
I believe it was a channeled message
http://www.spiritualforums.com/vb/sh...ad.php?t=50509

[spiralfungi]

Thank you for the link impulsv. I visited through your actual thread a few days ago. And it has been very helpful and eyeopening.

[DARKEST_HOUR]

Pffft marriage. Who needs it.....it's just a piece of paper in my eyes.

Originally Posted by soulful

I know I have found a soul connection, whether he's a tf or not, I don't know and quite honestly, it doesn't matter what name it has been given...it's an undeniable connection, nonetheless.

However, I a married and feel somewhat guilty that my heart and soul gives attention to this other person and also to my newfound goal, which is to grow spiritually and keep an open link with my soul connection. My spouse shows no desire for this type of growth and he and I are on two different planes regarding these beliefs. He does not know of this connection.

Is anyone in my situation (guilt & a spiritually detached spouse) and how do you handle it?

I can't say I'm in your position, though my heart goes out to you because that can't be easy. What I can say, is that sometimes soul connections cross our paths at the most seemingly inconvenient time because that person is meant to pull us off the path we weren't meant to stay on.

[awakeningheart]

Soulful..there are many of us in the same situation - married (but not to our TF), TFs married to others...

I won't tell you it's an easy path to take. It's not. It's hard and it challenges everything you ever thought about relationships and marriage. The idea that you can love someone other than your spouse? That is considered the ultimate in betrayal in our society.

TF and I met a long time ago. He buried his feelings for me ..carried on, got married, did the 'right' thing. I respected that. I left him alone for a long long time. But I always knew - we both did. I also married ..someone who is a soul connection for me.. someone that leads me down the right path in life. But he's not spiritual and there are many many things that make us different. I wish I could explain to him what TF means to me - but to what end - he would just not understand and he does not want to know. And I have to respect that.

TF and I shared some very intense few months of talk - to the point where I also questioned my own moral fabric and how I could possibly have these feelings for someone other than my husband. It was my H who said 'you can't deny your feelings'. He allowed me to explore the relationship with TF because he trusted that I love him too.

TF and I are not together - in fact we made the very conscious joint decision not to be in contact anymore. We both respect the other's marriage too much to interfere. Because we know that what we have is permanent..but our loyalties right now are to our families.

Jakes on you for getting married. I have no intention of doing that. Don't want the state and the church intervening in my life.

Thank you Lady and Awakening Heart for your responses, I appreciate it.

Yes...loyalties. But at what cost, I often ask myself. I will never know because I am not as open as you to explore in the way my soul connection wanted to do. My guilt and commitment promise keeps me from it. I will never know.

It's kind of heartbreaking all around. That I would feel such intense feelings for someone other than my spouse. Totally disappointed in myself, but as everyone knows it's almost impossible to fight.

And I continue to keep my distance and try to move on.

I honestly don't want the almost debilitating reminder daily. Right now it's a struggle. But, I have to keep this course for the sake of my family.

I got married when I was 24. That was 2002. What a wrong move! However, I wouldn't change my past if I had a chance. Reason is, since I have loved connection since I was 9, it would have been a horrible ordeal to be married to a good woman and then see connection have all those feelings come back.

It was easy for me to acknowledge my feelings for connection because my marriage was loveless and terrible. When connection and I finally became physical, I knew then I had to do the right thing and finally leave that marriage. Connection is still with her husband in a horrible marriage as well. When she leaves, I'll be ready and available.

I truly empathize with you all that have good spouses and you find yourselves having connections with others. That's gotta be a really tough position.