To my TF--
dear TF --
I know you are on these forums somewhere--I want to tell you that I will not be able to love you the way I'd like. I'm being asked to perform a task that involves a test that either determines if I follow my path, or if I stay forever in limbo.
Problem is that I cannot seem to make it happen, I simply can't. My soul keeps making the test harder every time I fail it--which creates a pressure situation that I am not ready to handle. i couldn't handle pressure over a hundred lifetimes and to expect I could suddenly after a hellish lifetime before this one, was too much. I still have many issues I need to work out in this lifetime--I asked too much of myself and now I'm paying for it.
And since I'm not allowed to meet you until I pass it-I think you know what thst means.
Goodbye, K. Perhaps we'll meet again in another lifetime, one where I won't be under enormous pressure like this. It's been going on for a year and I've had it. Just going to live my life.
I hope you find a new student to love and to teach one who is worth so much more than I am.
__________________
“Because to take away a man's freedom of choice, even his freedom to make the wrong choice, is to manipulate him as though he were a puppet and not a person.” --Madeline l'Engle
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