Model Citizens.

[BlueSky]

Originally Posted by naturesflow

I absolutely love life too. I don't see that letting go in myself of everything that no longer serves me is taking away that love of life, if anything it supports more of life in me and around me as one source. What I become, models itself to others and life around me and it supports them as they need for their highest good too. There is a deep trust in knowing that I am open to let life lead me now to where my highest quest takes me. I would add that everything in my world supports that, because for me in that highest vision it is an inclusive awareness of all life and I am willing to do the work. It isn't just about myself alone, its about all life within me as one source together, but ultimately I trust myself and lead myself.

I don't have a driven personality at all, but I would say having overcome deep ingrained fears of life and death and it has spurred me to embrace life differently. I have more passion and joy within my being now. I am motivated by love, peace, balance, joy, fun, connection, so experiencing myself in ways that support these things. I challenge myself now to try new things, be more open to things that scare me. I am not afraid to create a life I love now. So I have deep self love and deep trust in myself and move from there.

The other important aspect of my life is that I care about what I am passionate about in relation to all I have become for myself, so I give back to others in this way. Having that deeper sense of purpose to my life supports my motivation. Doing what I love and sharing it.

I truly wish those words were mine. I know enough that a person who can utter such words is truly living the life we all can reach some day.
Its not surprising to me that the 2 main motivators you mention, trusting yourself and the feeling that you are helping others are both lacking in me.
To me giving up everything would include others in some way and I don't trust nor do I have such motivation to find out if that's true or not.
Recently I have lost about 30 pounds and I did so with a lot of hard work and a strong will and goal. As I am starting to not see results I feel my will wavering.
This scenario mimics my spiritual life. Maybe in both cases I have achieved my goals and what really bothers me is I am left with no goals.

[Spirit bird]

When I read your post a few things come to mind. Part of what I am feeling is that you are describing a release of blockages and karma that you are to work through and get rid of to help with your enlightenment and ascension.

The other part of what I am reading describes a battle between ego and higher self. We live in an extremely polarized society where we as a people have been sooooo preconditioned to be defined by what others feel are the "norms" for us. What to think, what to wear, what to eat and drink, what is best for us, and how to be politically right in order to fit in. I see this first hand every day in the simple things even at my workplace where we have a sign in sheet for clients to sign in to be called for service. There is signage that tells each person exactly what to do and to have a seat in a waiting area until called. But I can honestly say that more than half those people need someone to verbally tell them exactly what the sign states. They will just stand there and wait and without that verbal contact they honestly do not know what to do. I blame much of this on how society has controlled our thinking for too long.
Being awakened and as open as I have become, I realize how free thinking an individual I am and how uncomfortable it is to try to be put into a "box" so to speak. I exalt all my resources and look around and notice most things around me that others would robotically need telling. To them I would be considered a loose cannon. It is hard trying to understand this polarization that I see. It really is pretty sad. So I am thinking that part of the post is referring to this type of cookie cutter image that society expects all to have and how to break free of that mold and the dictation that we must rely on others to tell us what is correct or what to think and feel.

[naturesflow]

Originally Posted by BlueSky

I truly wish those words were mine. I know enough that a person who can utter such words is truly living the life we all can reach some day.
Its not surprising to me that the 2 main motivators you mention, trusting yourself and the feeling that you are helping others are both lacking in me.
To me giving up everything would include others in some way and I don't trust nor do I have such motivation to find out if that's true or not.
Recently I have lost about 30 pounds and I did so with a lot of hard work and a strong will and goal. As I am starting to not see results I feel my will wavering.
This scenario mimics my spiritual life. Maybe in both cases I have achieved my goals and what really bothers me is I am left with no goals.

I honestly didn't believe I would be the person I am today Bluesky. There were many periods within my process where by I didn't have hope, couldn't see myself in years to come, felt like my world was falling apart in everyway. I do feel like I am a completely new person in many ways. I know getting older things change, we change and often we are very different and aware of changes in ourselves with maturity, there are the obvious things that most notice. But for me when I say these words, it much more, I feel very blessed and I feel very connected to myself like I have never been before. To me the work on myself as deep and as long as it has been, has paid off, rewarded me with this feeling and deep sense of connection to myself and the world around me.

I have had to take many leaps of faith in my life process and I often didn't want too, or believe I could. I realized that it always came/comes back to self doubt and trust in myself regardless of what might not come/or come of all that, trusting either way. Being ok to break through my own comfort zones. (I am still learning all these things ongoing) Being ok with change for myself and others in my choices of change.

Recently I was in conversation with friends about having goals in life to bring balance to those areas of your life where things becomes to difficult or challenge us. I have always been a "go with the flow" person, but for me now, I see that goals support balance of being as well as the flow. Being aware of yourself as/in both can be very supportive. Both have become important in my view now. When things are not going the way I anticipate in my goals or needs, trusting in the process and moving with that redirection or change, or even moving differently can bring back a shift through the flow of all that and support as one.

I suppose one of my greatest gifts is that I push through, I never give up. I always look for a way, a solution, a means to bring to myself what I need to support myself. In my awakening I was challenged and pushed by spirit guides in my world in ways I never would have done alone. They gave me a gift to see the world differently, to see my potential, to embrace my life in ways in deep trust of everything as it is. I felt crushed, pushed, forced, challenged, terrified, overwhelmed. I needed to feel it all and let it all go...to build trust in myself and my life differently.

There are always going to be lulls in our process, the key is embracing them as a transitory space of change that we cannot yet see the full potential of. I know when things used to slow down, or lull I would feel helpless and low in myself. I had to adjust to the transition space in ways where I had to face myself and let go of the old patterns in myself, believing I was not "gaining" but losing out in some way.

Congratulations on losing so much weight. Your should be very proud of your achievements so far. That is a wonderful accomplishment.

[BlueSky]

Originally Posted by naturesflow

I honestly didn't believe I would be the person I am today Bluesky. There were many periods within my process where by I didn't have hope, couldn't see myself in years to come, felt like my world was falling apart in everyway. I do feel like I am a completely new person in many ways. I know getting older things change, we change and often we are very different and aware of changes in ourselves with maturity, there are the obvious things that most notice. But for me when I say these words, it much more, I feel very blessed and I feel very connected to myself like I have never been before. To me the work on myself as deep and as long as it has been, has paid off, rewarded me with this feeling and deep sense of connection to myself and the world around me.

I have had to take many leaps of faith in my life process and I often didn't want too, or believe I could. I realized that it always came/comes back to self doubt and trust in myself regardless of what might not come/or come of all that, trusting either way. Being ok to break through my own comfort zones. (I am still learning all these things ongoing) Being ok with change for myself and others in my choices of change.

Recently I was in conversation with friends about having goals in life to bring balance to those areas of your life where things becomes to difficult or challenge us. I have always been a "go with the flow" person, but for me now, I see that goals support balance of being as well as the flow. Being aware of yourself as/in both can be very supportive. Both have become important in my view now. When things are not going the way I anticipate in my goals or needs, trusting in the process and moving with that redirection or change, or even moving differently can bring back a shift through the flow of all that and support as one.

I suppose one of my greatest gifts is that I push through, I never give up. I always look for a way, a solution, a means to bring to myself what I need to support myself. In my awakening I was challenged and pushed by spirit guides in my world in ways I never would have done alone. They gave me a gift to see the world differently, to see my potential, to embrace my life in ways in deep trust of everything as it is. I felt crushed, pushed, forced, challenged, terrified, overwhelmed. I needed to feel it all and let it all go...to build trust in myself and my life differently.

There are always going to be lulls in our process, the key is embracing them as a transitory space of change that we cannot yet see the full potential of. I know when things used to slow down, or lull I would feel helpless and low in myself. I had to adjust to the transition space in ways where I had to face myself and let go of the old patterns in myself, believing I was not "gaining" but losing out in some way.

Congratulations on losing so much weight. Your should be very proud of your achievements so far. That is a wonderful accomplishment.

Great post, I can certainly relate to all it at different times in my life. You are an inspiration. Thanks for the talk. Have a great day.

[Sugar-n-Spice]

Model citizens are usually tormented by society

Originally Posted by naturesflow

I came to realize I had to let go of my model citizen outlook and lead myself into the space of not being a very good model at all.

I am like this right now
Accepting all boyfriends!
(*bias towards handsome men and extreme bias toward sexy men who think outside the norm and are not taken out of their characters by lure or temptation but naturally stay strong against the same, if even by inner logic, and change if they will by their own determination)

[naturesflow]

Originally Posted by Sugar-n-Spice

Model citizens are usually tormented by society

I am like this right now
Accepting all boyfriends!
(*bias towards handsome men and extreme bias toward sexy men who think outside the norm and are not taken out of their characters by lure or temptation but naturally stay strong against the same, if even by inner logic, and change if they will by their own determination)

I spoke with a man today in my passing. He shared he lived on his own, keeps himself away from the world and does his own thing. He opened up about his past and current circumstances. It was very hard road he had travelled and he admitted to me of his inner rage and torment through his pain of his upbringing. I listened and shared with him for over half hour or so. He told me he lives a simple life now, walks around looking for simple things to help him survive, content as his way is for him now. He has been tormented by society in lots of ways, but one thing I noticed in listening and seeing him, not being afraid of his world as it was, was that I really liked him. He was a very smart wise soul who was struggling but making do with as little as possible. He told me he had it all in his other life but his pain took over and he left the world to manage himself and his way of life. I was really inspired by his sharing, even as, at times I felt my fear arise in the harshness of his world and reality, but I stayed with him. We left with happy faces and big smiles after our chat. I told him he made my day. He told me, he could tell I had broken out of societies box. I think that was our commonality, even as we were living two very different lives, his was far removed from my own, mine from his, but that underlying truth of not being boxed in by society, flowed throughout the conversation..

as much as model citizen be a duty so does
model citizen "act" as an really greater reward

we might want to rethink some things, about
that. might. take the small gentle first steps or
something