My experience with a death that wasn't my own...

[Oaken]

Hello everyone,

I'm new here and I'm in search of some answers hopefully, as well as others with similar experiences. I apologize in advance if this post gets really long, I begin typing sometimes and get carried away...

I had an experience roughly a decade ago that has been probably the most intense, strange and life altering thing that's ever happened to me. I frequently have "sleep paralysis" that sometimes transforms into what I believe is called "remote viewing". This is involuntary, though I've made attempts to control it, I honestly have very little to none.

This particular event, like all of these I have, made no sense to me. I have no idea how or why I connected to it? I just became part of it and while I felt like it was me that it was happening to, I only realized it wasn't after I awoke. It was that realistic, to this day my brain can not distinguish it from reality. So it change me, it made me a totally different person and freed me spiritually I feel.

I was going to a machine shop, to pick up some parts that needed to have a protective coating applied. The building was brick, older, nothing special. I walked out with my parts after paying, got in my vehicle and was driving home I think, I didn't think about where I was driving but I knew where I was going. This was in a city, the closest place I've found to it is Southside Richmond, VA. I come out of the backstreets onto a main street which leads beneath a pretty average cloverleaf style underpass. I know which lane I need to be in to get into the freeway to avoid having to change lanes.

A ways before I get there, I see a car sitting on the right side of the road, on the shoulder. It's obviously having mechanical trouble, it was either a silver or white Mitsubishi Eclipse, 96-99 model but I didn't pay that much attention to the exact color, though I did recognize the taillights right away. I'm driving pretty quickly past it when I catch flames flickering from beneath it out of the corner of my eye. I think: Oh no, I've got to stop.

So for some reason, I hit the brakes fairly hard and notice the vehicle I'm driving slip just a bit as I came to a stop. I didn't think anything of it at the time, at this point I notice a couple others have noticed and have pulled in behind the broken down car. By the time I come to a stop, I'm in front of the car and my hand is on the door handle as I slam my vehicle in park. My fear is, that it's going to ignite and the person inside the car doesn't know it's on fire. There was very little smoke, the flames were small and coming from behind the front wheel well, where the engine is.

I get out of my vehicle and immediately notice that the pavement is really wet, it's soaked. But the weather is perfect, a partly cloudy early summer day. Once I notice the wet pavement, I'm fixated on it and it's almost like I can't move. My brain is trying to compute what's happening, then it hits me: it's gas from that car... At this point all I can think about is getting away from it, I realize I can't. I know, with everything in me, that I'm about to burn. Before I can even react to that realization, I barely here someone yell: "get" and it ignites.

I prepare for the pain, I cringe and get ready to suffer this awful, unimaginable pain as I'm scared beyond belief at the same time over what death is going to be. But I didn't feel it, it was almost like time stopped. Like my mind, soul, consciousness knew I was in a hopeless situation and I was spared the pain of burning. I am not sure what happened at this point, I was no longer there at the burning car nor was I back in my body. I didn't know where I was and didn't care.

I didn't care about anything, I was totally freed from all emotion and all my physical senses. I saw nothing, I only experienced a visual "whiteness" with no bounds. As horrible as it may sound, it was the most fantastic, amazing thing I've ever felt or experienced in my life. It was sheer peace and in this moment, which only lasted for maybe 2-3 seconds, I was able to understand anything. It was like a truth was revealed to me and I have trouble explaining it. I understood that everything I had thought mattered so much, didn't. It was a comfort beyond explanation. I knew, in the most very, simple way that I was infinite and so was everyone else.

Our conciousness, it wasn't individual. Physical life and the "body" gave the illusion of an "individual" soul. In that moment, I knew that our consciousness was way beyond the physical world. Our "physical body" and it's animal nature, to be hungry, hurt, sad, lonely... To be angry or scared, the unrelenting need to protect my family, the worry for how they would fare without me, was absolutely gone. I understood that all those things are functions of the "physical, animal body" trying to survive and ensure continued animal/physical survival.

I love my family and care for them above all else. But to be separated from "that" particular instinct and be shown that our consciousness/soul/spirit is one, infinite, undying entity, gave me peace beyond measure. It changed my entire outlook and mentality towards everything. But my issue is now, that I'm more connected to it than I am people. I find most people to be unbearingly blinded by emotions and things that just do not matter. A good deal of what is considered "important" to most of society today, is just childish nonsense to me now. Strangely though, my desire to protect and care for my family has been enhanced beyond measure in "physical life".

I'm still afraid of death, but not the way I once was. I long for that feeling of connection to what I experienced in those 2-3 seconds constantly. Physical life became so noisy and distracting that I'm now living back in the heavily wooded, forested place that I grew up in. Just so I can try to avoid the deafening and blinding noise from physical life in today's society. I want to find my way back to that connection with what I can only describe as raw, unfiltered consciousness as one.

I have no wish to die, I am actually overwhelmed with a desire to live. But to be physically alive and find a way to reconnect to it. I didn't have enough time to think about enough things that I yearn to know, I wish to know universal truth. Not necessarily "every" universal truth, just to confirm some things I feel that are true. That's what this was, it was the truth about what our soul is. I accessed this once by accident or maybe by the direction of something I don't understand, I feel I can do it again without crossing over and permanently leaving this existence behind, like what I experienced when this other consciousness I was connected to at the moment of their physical body death.

Sorry for the monstrous post, other than my immediate family, you who read this are the first I've shared this with. I was recently compelled to search for my answers. I have been compelled to share this because I give any who reads this my word, it was a fantastic thing. It has improved my "physical life" dramatically. Even though it has caused me to become withdrawn from society, I am happy and at peace. I'm going to bring this to a close here. One last thing, this experience has given me an instinct in physical life about what "truly" matters and what doesn't. I'll know it because when I'm in tune with a "truth" I feel closer to that experience. When I stray and allow myself to get caught up in emotional things, jealousy, envy, anger... I feel myself drifting away from it.

I'm redirecting myself back towards it and I'm going to share it this time. I don't care if people call me crazy, I'll risk the repercussions. This was as real to me as sitting here typing this out. It was important and I'm being scared and greedy by not sharing it.

Thanks for reading about this, please feel free to comment any way you like. I know it's not that "cool" or "interesting" post. But it is exactly how it happened to me and I'm grateful for it.

ETA: I welcome any insight into what is happening or has happened with my experience. I'm pretty ignorant to a lot of this and what it is called. Maybe that is a reason why I continue to have these experiences. Most of them are juat random sequences of events that I don't understand. I sometimes understand them later when the memory of my experience intersects with my physical life. In a bizarre sort of deja vu that I have perfect recall of having viewed it or dreamed it. It's strange to me these premonitions continue to happen as well. Although they rarely have any significance, just random life moments. Maybe I don't understand the significance or they are just truly random events I pick up before they happen to me. Any insight is welcome.