He does not understand part of me

Hey there everyone,
I have a bit of a problem, in my relationship. I am not sure if there is really something wrong, but sometimes we have a problem.
We pretty much almost never fight, its easier to us to talk about things, but sometimes something he does hurts me.

The thing is that I am a very artistic kind of person, I paint, make things and care a lot about the meaning of things. The symbolism, the meaning. But every time I try to explain to him what I made, what it means to me, he shrugs and explains that he is not the type of person that understands that kind of thing. And he doesn't try.
For me, deep inside this is scary, because he does not seem to understand that what I show him,.. is me.
My deeper self, my deeper knowing.
When I have come to understand something about myself, I try to express it. But in that, I am alone.

I will give an example.
This past time I have been working on a painting with a peaceful looking girl on it, that has her eyes closed. There is a lotus flower growing above her head, and green lotus leafs around her.
In my thoughts, my painting is about a person that is looking inside herself, that is why her eyes are closed. The lotus symbol is about growing from nothing into something. Growing from the mud, to the light above the water. To me, the mud is about the difficulties in the past, and the lotus is growing out of it.
In the painting the girl is me, that is how it feels to me. I look inside and see that I am growing. It is basically what it is about. It is me seeing my potential, which is special to me because I am a very shy and unsure kind of person full of self doubt.
Painting it, helps me to grow.
When I am painting it, I feel joy, because I realize there is potential in me. The amazing thing is, that it just flowed. Which is what I search for all the time.
aa.jpg

To me, all of this has meaning. Meaning that makes me happy and hopeful. It gives me energy.
I tried to explain this to my partner, but he was like 'ah well, I am not the type of person that understands these things'. And that was that. He does appreciate the technique, or how well it is done. But the meaning is gibberish to him.
To me it is so important that my partner, understands this part of me. That I can talk to him about it. And I even want him to see it, by himself, what it means. Because it is me,.. I want him to understand me. To see me.
Friends see it, my mother sees it, lots of people see what it is about.

Sometimes I get all quiet when this kind of conversation happens. I get so scared.. and my motivation to express more, gets lost.
Is it a bad sign in a relationship?
Or is he just a very different kind of person? And should I learn not to want him to see what it is about?
Is he scared of the deeper meaning of things? Can I help him grow into that?
Or should I not try to change it?

I feel ungrateful, because there is so much to him that is wonderful. I love him a lot. It is just this one thing that really bothers me and scares me.
I cannot express this big part of me, to him. He does not see it.

He does care about the fact that I am painting again, he tells me over and over to keep on going, because he wants me to be happy.
But he does not see me. He just sees pictures.

I just wanted to share it here, and see what others would say about it.
Can you help me?

[SpiritLife]

Ask him how something he does, that's important to him only, makes him feel inside. Create a situation where he's sharing a deep part of himself to you and show an interest in that. Talk with him about it.
And should there be any one thing he should say about himself and his feelings toward that be the same way you feel within yourself about yours, explain to him that this is the way you feel when you paint.
Make this of utmost importance to both of you.
Worth a try maybe........

[SpiritLife]

I didn't see the painting....

You painted that??? That's beautiful.....!!!
:)

I don't think it's particularly important for him "not to understand", quite honestly. Unless he is an artistic person or at least, an aficionado of art, it may mean little to him. But does that really matter?

What's here is you expressing yourself. You hope, rightly, to reach out to many but not everyone will understand (or even be receptive to) your expression. Unreasonable to expect that.
Even less, a person who is not emotionally attuned to visual art.

I don't think it's necessary to have this particular "meshing" for a good solid relationship. It's important to have enough in common to bond; to share your lives otherwise but his strengths might lie in another area. It's often by pooling our separate resources that we can bond and give to each other.

I can speak with some experience, also in a creative field. I honestly never expect a b/f to appreciate or understand what I'm doing. My only worry is that, sometimes seized by inspiration, I'd throw myself into it and appear to be neglecting or snubbing the person. Thankfully that doesn't happen often but with new ideas it may.

Of course, it's nice when a b/friend seems to appreciate what I'm making, better still get the message, but I don't expect it. In fact sometimes it goes the other way and I get criticism that arises from a partial or defective understanding. I am quite happy to receive criticism, good or bad, but sooner it came from someone knowing either a lot - or nothing. Meddlesome criticism simply makes me want to bark back!

So, in a way, be glad he isn't a dilettante art critic at least!

I reckon it's all right. If the relationship works while giving you enough time and space to pursue your creativity, that sounds fine. It might be nice if he could engage more - but as you progress he may come to appreciate your talent and expression a little more. Don't snub him over it and, yes, make him feel his part of the relationship by inviting opinion but don't worry if he blanks!

[joyfirst]

I think it boils down to, how important that to you is in a boyfriend. You said you get that sort of understanding from you family and friends, so just you can decide, if it is crucial for you in him. No wrong or right, just what is right for you.
I am sure, you don't understand everything about him either.