Kind of frustrated

Well, I've finally been able to get out a hand full of times. But I still can't seem to control what's going on around me. This last time I got out, I kept trying to sit still to concentrate on seeing my main guide, but stuff kept happening that I didn't seem to have much control over.

At one point, I seemed to by laying on my back and was being pulled down a hallway by my shoulders. I kept trying to grab onto something to stop, but couldn't. Finally, I was able to grab onto a door frame and I stopped moving. But by that time, I'd kind of decided that were ever I was going, I'd bring love with me. When I finally got to where I was being taken, I did manage to change something to a more positive what ever was going on.

And then shortly after that, I once again tried to just sit down and concentrate on seeing my guide. There was a park bench right next to a road, and a lake just beyond that. As I was sitting there, looking at the lake and thinking about my guide, the lake just started getting closer and closer as if I were flying towards it. I even wound up going into the water. So I figured I'd just play around with if for a bit, to get it out of my system, and was both gliding through the water and jumping up into the air to dance. But even after I reigned in all that playfulness, to get back to my task, I still couldn't see my guide, even though he was supposedly there the whole time. When I finally came back to my body, I could feel him touching the back of my shoulder and holding my hand. And he stayed there for several minutes doing that.

I just don't understand why I haven't been able to get better control yet, especially when I clearly have my goal to see my guide. Does anyone have any suggestions or possible explanations as to why this is happening?

Perhaps when you have a goal in mind, you should state what your intention is verbally or mentally with complete confidence that you will be successful. One can also use a door (just like a mirror) as a portal to take them to where, who or what they want to go to. For example, with a door that is closed say, "when I go through this door, I will see my guide". Then open the door and go through. I can assure you that this does work because I've done many times before. Hope this helps.

I'd been trying to do something like that. Maybe I'm just not being assertive or confident enough. I do know that a few times when I've tried to take over too much control, I wind up becoming too consciously aware and pull myself completely out of astral/lucidity. Guess I just need to find the right combination of determined confidence. Thanks for the tip.