Does forgiving really heal karmic relationships?

First of all I want to know whether every single person we meet in our life is DESTINED to cross the path either to be a blessing or a lesson? Specially exes or even friends who we meet in our life , have they met us before in our past lives? I don't have a big circle of friends and I feel like whoever I met in this life were meant to meet me.As in it was destined/planned/pre determined. Or maybe they are the ones who I have been with in my past lives.

So even among those people I have met there are special ones with whom I share/shared a significant connection. And there are people who I care so much , or significant to me but our connections were never smooth. They always bring out the worst in me or vise versa.There can be constant quarrels but deep within ME (I don't know about the other party) I still care for them.They can be a bag full of stuff but I still care like in a love-hate relationship.And I still wish it was sorted out and FIXED. But it is never fixed. Maybe because the other party dislikes me or doesn't want to fix it. But time to time they have shown the good side too, I mean that is why they are significant,even though there is this hard to understand dislike/un easiness between the 2 the connection has been significant to both the parties.If it was significant in a bad way then does it mean it is a karmic relationship? . What makes relationships this way?

I also wish to know whether forgiving someone or sending love to someone like that telepathically can actually bring a change in the physical reality ? As in , can the hate or dislike a certain person has for me be dissolved if I send them love and forgiveness as mental messages to heal the karma/hate that we have been carrying for maybe over many lives from the past?

Hoʻoponopono has been effective to me in several instances but I am not too sure how it might be helpful to change karmic relationships. Can I kindly have your opinions on this? And personal experiences anyone want to share?

[Nan948]

These are deep questions FrankieJG. Forgiveness and Karma are interesting concepts. The only time I was ever able to forgive is when I heal. When I heal forgiveness is not even a thought. It just comes naturally. I have never been able to forgive while still in pain. So when someone says forgive, I just hear heal yourself and forgiveness will come. I have never been able to master the art of forgiving while still in pain.

Karma always sounds like such a bad thing. Everyone we meet we have "karma" with. They are here to teach us, it is up to us whether we want to look at it as good or bad but either experience is always beneficial to us in some way. We just have to take those lessons and learn from it and learn to move on and be better persons from those lessons. We have to learn to heal and forgive ourselves when we do wrong and learn to forgive others when they do wrong. We are only human and in our learning process we will make mistakes.

Originally Posted by FrankieJG

Does forgiving really heal karmic relationships? ?

I think that if both learnt their lesson from the experience, become better from the experience, forgive with no hard feelings, I think this heals karmic relationships. It sounds unfair to me if one person from the karmic relationship learns their lesson from what the experience was trying to teach, and the other stubbornly refuses to learn their lesson, and the karmic bonds are still not broken. So, I would like to think that if one of the person in the karmic relationship learns their lesson, it breaks the karmic bonds with the karmic partner. The graduated partner moves on to their next karmic lesson while the other karmic partner who has not learnt their lesson and has decided to graduate within the next 5 years, gets to live the karma with another person that is on the same path with the same lessons to learn, until they learn the lesson the experience is trying to teach them.

Originally Posted by FrankieJG

I also wish to know whether forgiving someone or sending love to someone like that telepathically can actually bring a change in the physical reality?

It is best to let them know you forgive them and tell them you love them in real time and then let them be. I don't think ringing the telepathic bell is a good idea when someone is mad at you or if they feel guilty about something they did to you. When someone invades my energy when I don't want them to, it makes me not happy and a little insane. I think withdrawing your energy and giving them space would be the better thing to do, but there is no harm in forgiving someone or loving them. In fact, this would be good healing energy for yourself and the people around you.

Originally Posted by FrankieJG

As in , can the hate or dislike a certain person has for me be dissolved if I send them love and forgiveness as mental messages to heal the karma/hate that we have been carrying for maybe over many lives from the past?

Hate and dislikes dissolves when people heal and choose to let go of hate and dislike. Unfortunately, usually people emotions don't change because someone else would like it to change. They have to change themselves. Also I think most hate and dislikes are secondary emotions, and I would like to go as far and say that they are all secondary emotions. If the primary emotion is dealt with, the hate and dislike will go away. Most people feel hate and dislike because someone made them sad or hurt them. Once they acknowledge their primary emotion, they themselves admit that they do not feel hate, that what they feel is hurt and if someone acknowledges and really understands the hurt and pain and sadness they are going through, it opens the door to healing and close the door to the toxic emotions of hate and dislike.

Originally Posted by FrankieJG

Hoʻoponopono has been effective to me in several instances but I am not too sure how it might be helpful to change karmic relationships. Can I kindly have your opinions on this? And personal experiences anyone want to share??

Hoopo what? :-) I am not familiar with it but I just looked it up. I guess it is a form of Alternative Dispute Resolution closer to mediation perhaps, not sure. Yes I believe that everyone that has a problem with each other should do a Hoʻoponopono. Unfortunately most angry people are not looking for solutions. They can't see beyond the anger. But if they are forced to do the Hoopo... I think it would be beneficial, put them in a safe setting where they know that they have a third party to mediate so that they can be heard and their feelings won't be disrespected, where they can get in touch with their primary emotions and receive and give the empathy, understanding, forgiveness and communication that they need to heal. Sounds like a really good thing.

[Baile]

Originally Posted by FrankieJG

They can be a bag full of ***t but I still care like in a love-hate relationship.And I still wish it was sorted out and FIXED. But it is never fixed. Maybe because the other party dislikes me or doesn't want to fix it.

If it [the connection] was significant in a bad way then does it mean it is a karmic relationship? What makes relationships this way?

If you attempt to pet a growling dog, chances are you'll get bit. If you get bit, and then attempt to pet the dog again, and it bites you once more... Does this mean your relationship with this dog is karmic? Or does it mean you keep getting bit out of your need to fix the dog's behaviour and make it like you?

Spirituality is mostly about common sense and, in the case of relationships, recognizing certain truths regarding a person's behavior. If a person mistreats you, it means they don't really like you. Does it matter then if the relationship is "karmic"? No. The only observation that matters at that point is the relationship is "broken." The relationship is "not an actual relationship."

The healthiest option is to simply move on. You can forgive a person for their lack of love in the privacy of your new-found single-status. Unless your real intent is to fix and save the relationship. If that's the case, then the intent isn't really about forgiveness; it's more about your need to be in a relationship with that person, even it it means being mistreated by them. That's what happens when you put labels on these things. In this case the "karmic" label serves as a spiritual excuse to stay in the dysfunction.

Originally Posted by Baile

If you attempt to pet a growling dog, chances are you'll get bit. If you get bit, and then attempt to pet the dog again, and it bites you once more... Does this mean your relationship with this dog is karmic? Or does it mean you keep getting bit out of your need to fix the dog's behaviour and make it like you?

Spirituality is mostly about common sense and, in the case of relationships, recognizing certain truths regarding a person's behavior. If a person mistreats you, it means they don't really like you. Does it matter then if the relationship is "karmic"? No. The only observation that matters at that point is the relationship is "broken." The relationship is "not an actual relationship."

The healthiest option is to simply move on. You can forgive a person for their lack of love in the privacy of your new-found single-status. Unless your real intent is to fix and save the relationship. If that's the case, then the intent isn't really about forgiveness; it's more about your need to be in a relationship with that person, even it it means being mistreated by them. That's what happens when you put labels on these things. In this case the "karmic" label serves as a spiritual excuse to stay in the dysfunction.

Agree. Spells it out plainly especially your last paragraph.

I suppose much depends on whether someone is happier subverting honesty in favour of emotional need.
Honesty can be a bit of a pain but it gets the person back on their feet quicker.

♥

[FallingLeaves]

Originally Posted by FrankieJG

First of all I want to know whether every single person we meet in our life is DESTINED to cross the path either to be a blessing or a lesson? Specially exes or even friends who we meet in our life , have they met us before in our past lives? I don't have a big circle of friends and I feel like whoever I met in this life were meant to meet me.As in it was destined/planned/pre determined. Or maybe they are the ones who I have been with in my past lives.

So even among those people I have met there are special ones with whom I share/shared a significant connection. And there are people who I care so much , or significant to me but our connections were never smooth. They always bring out the worst in me or vise versa.There can be constant quarrels but deep within ME (I don't know about the other party) I still care for them.They can be a bag full of stuff but I still care like in a love-hate relationship.And I still wish it was sorted out and FIXED. But it is never fixed. Maybe because the other party dislikes me or doesn't want to fix it. But time to time they have shown the good side too, I mean that is why they are significant,even though there is this hard to understand dislike/un easiness between the 2 the connection has been significant to both the parties.If it was significant in a bad way then does it mean it is a karmic relationship? . What makes relationships this way?

I also wish to know whether forgiving someone or sending love to someone like that telepathically can actually bring a change in the physical reality ? As in , can the hate or dislike a certain person has for me be dissolved if I send them love and forgiveness as mental messages to heal the karma/hate that we have been carrying for maybe over many lives from the past?

Hoʻoponopono has been effective to me in several instances but I am not too sure how it might be helpful to change karmic relationships. Can I kindly have your opinions on this? And personal experiences anyone want to share?

some people maybe, others may be there to teach us something we couldn't learn otherwise or vice versa. Or maybe some random encounters to keep stuff spinning

love/hate is hard.... you are so attracted to the other but at the same time you 'remember' what it is like to be with them and some part of you doesn't want that... so you rebel. I don't know how that ever gets resolved or if it does....

prayer works, and I think it does make a difference if you are nice to someone with only your thoughts if that is all you care to do. But that is just me Whether you'd get results in the short term I dunno though.