Just talked to him

[Christine]

Hey all
I'm really spun out by this entire experience. Well I would be if I could but I'm rust rolling with the whole thing now.
Just talked to him and involuntarily just melted.
I feel my whole personality restructuring itself. Defenses, expectations and neurosis and the need to think something out ahead until it makes mental sense before approaching a situation is all falling away. I really thought all that stuff was me..
Especially the "thinking stuff out ahead" one. And "I must talk to this person like I have to prove some wisdom" OK so honestly who you think you are is totally going to be wiped out.
I just saw the post titles on the forum and immediately could see this "anxious impatient hungry uncertain" energy in most title headings. It's become so totally part of us in here we aren't aware..i wasn't until today and the titles all totally looked legitimate until then haha.

[ForeverRestless]

He has a partner. So how are you approaching the relationship? Is it with romantic detachment? Are you talks with him as a friend and an equal and not someone seeking something additional from him... that only he can give you?

[Baile]

Your post reminded me of my 30's, and being in a relationship I didn't want to be in, and all the illicit connections in my mind I was making with women I would meet. Ah, to have all that energy again lol.

[Christine]

Originally Posted by Baile

Your post reminded me of my 30's, and being in a relationship I didn't want to be in, and all the illicit connections in my mind I was making with women I would meet. Ah, to have all that energy again lol.

Haha maybe it is like that, we'll it's good to hear the comments :)

[Baile]

Originally Posted by Christine

Haha maybe it is like that, we'll it's good to hear the comments :)

Thanks, I didn't mean it as judgment, I have no idea what your situation is, the two posts just brought back memories of that desire to connect. Is there anything more powerful and crazy and unique to material life than that deep and single-minded passion that draws two people to one another? Being human is so amazing, what a journey.

[Christine]

Originally Posted by ForeverRestless

He has a partner. So how are you approaching the relationship? Is it with romantic detachment? Are you talks with him as a friend and an equal and not someone seeking something additional from him... that only he can give you?

Thanks, i definitely want to be aware of these things and not con myself into something. When I talk to my mum I don't figure out how to approach the relationship with a mother and what I can gain from my mum, I feel they just are who they are. There isn't a relationship she is just a human being and I don't have to fragment any situation, I always treat her like her., not how mind says she is, just who she is.

[Christine]

Originally Posted by Baile

Thanks, I didn't mean it as judgment, I have no idea what your situation is, the two posts just brought back memories of that desire to connect. Is there anything more powerful and crazy and unique to material life than that deep and single-minded passion that draws two people to one another? Being human is so amazing, what a journey.

I think you misunderstood "melted" like school girl Omg eeeehhhhhhh haha.
This is a very silent melting. I don't know if it's some weird mind perversion or something or if I'm prone to manipulation, but the melting is this melting of defenses and expectations and paranoia

[wolfgaze]

Originally Posted by Christine

I think you misunderstood "melted" like school girl Omg eeeehhhhhhh haha.

I was envisioning 'melting' like the Wicked Witch of the West from The Wizard Of Oz...

:icon_mrgreen:

[Somnia]

Originally Posted by wolfgaze

I was envisioning 'melting' like the Wicked Witch of the West from The Wizard Of Oz...

:icon_mrgreen:

Oh what a world! What a world!