Quote:
Originally Posted by Tortoise Walks
My first thoughts are to question how you think that anyone outside of a marriage can singlehandedly wreck a marriage between two other people? No one can own another or take someone away from someone else. That’s my perspective. Having lived thru some of what you describe. Without any TF labeling... just life...
i came to the conclusion that the end of a marriage is an inside job. What is a marriage anway? Isn’t it created between those who are married? Even if they both made assumptions and projections of what it would be... not lining up for what it is for both?
However, it is easy to point a finger and call others home wreckers when some marriages fail or need to be redefined and agreed upon over time. To me... it’s now equally unsettling that “marriage” has to be protected and walked around on tippy toes and eggshells... no getting to get too close to others who are married. You may topple another’s marriage with a little bit of flirting and or seduction or even sharing hobbies. I guess i feel like... if you can “take” “my” husband or friend or whoever away from me... they were never “mine” to keep... and we weren’t “soulfully” married... children irregardless... some folks are better co-parenting separately. Staying together for the children can often be unkind and emotionally damaging... I also know from life that keeping the inheritance and/or promise of family and contracts is not always the best thing to support and continue forward for the health, happiness, and well being of everyone.
Growth comes to us in many different ways. Many of which we can judge as this or that. Right or wrong... I figure all i can do is authentically be myself... that may mean expressing heart feelings... and being vulnerable... and honest with those i am in relationship with. Letting them do the same...
TW
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Now this is real talk!!!
I have a Twin that is married with a kid. And that was pre arranged He saw a target to look good in the church and his family and took it. They married before they even dated at 22 and had a baby 4 years later. Now what horny 22 year olds with a liberty to phuq after a two year missionary program takes 4 years for a kid??? They had to get to know each other first and they did that while married its so sad...and now years later a real connection comes and it rocks ur world and gives definition to why the passion is missing why there is a disconnect with the family why it looks like a brother and sister raising their little sister? but after 10 plus years and families on both sides invested and u being so used to it its gonne be difficult getting out of that.... and you don't know where the person stands until you approach them about it . How do you feel about our connection? where do you see urself with THEM down the line?
The magnetism you may have might be too strong and you may have an intimate rendezvous and then what ur some kind of cheating homewrecker because someone printed some papers at a courthouse?
Well his worldly or karmic contract is not my responsibility or worry
that's for them to handle.
However I do believe the free will should be respected
and if you are in union even as friends or close family friend that is okay
it does not always mean a romantic endeavor
but sometimes that deep connection is powerful and sensual