Removing someone from your life

Originally Posted by Smiler

Sparkle
the person to be kind to now is really yourself

Yes, I agree

strikes me this could be one of 2 things.

a) is there a pay off for you? Even if you don't realise it, or don't want to acknowledge it, there is often a payoff for something we can't quite get round to changing.

b) they have energetic hooks in you. They might be energy vampires and are are leeching energy from you.

If it is a then look at the payoff and work out how you can replace that, or see that you don't need it.

If it's b then psychic protection would help.

If they come round every day, is it the same time roughly? Can you be elsewhere at that time?

Can you put a note on the inside of the door that you would see before you open it to remind you you have the strength to not open the door?

It sounds like you just need a bit of strength, if you change how you act to them they HAVE to change too.

you CAN do this!

[Adrienne]

Originally Posted by mattie

This isn't a spell, but a useful visualizaion. It is a 'spell' on one's own energies, but I'm not keen on using the word 'spell' as it implies something magical when it isn't. It is just working w/ our own thoughts. If one must view it as a spell, this is OK & hopefully they will move on to realizing that they can just use their focused intent to empower their self to take needed action. One can mentally visualize this at any time.

I wasn't quite sure what to call it,
and yes " one can mentally visualize this at any time " but just think how much fun it would be to actually do it ! Take that broom and sweep it all out the door !!!

and there is nothing wrong with a little magic, however one chooses to define it.

Sparkle ~ I just read your post and your comment that this person has a bad temper, definitely not a good idea to " sweep them out the door " while they are watching you do so, sorry ... in this case a visual is the better idea.

Dream Angel xx

[Miss Hepburn]

Sparkle,
You're in it deeper than I thought - you must be a triple Pisces. Sorry for the joke.

May I suggest somehow a week away from this
person to gain your strength or center?
In this case perhaps saying you have a stomach bug - can't talk - stay away for awhile?

They are hurting you - be strong! Put your foot down, figure out a way since they have a temper.
Good luck, honey.

I have the opposite problem, i suppose you could say i am one of those 'friends' old friends of mine wanted to remove from their life.

I sort of understand why, i was miserable alot and stuck in a day dream fantasy land. I wish my old friends and i could meet up once in a while but i was basically told that they would prefer just to be facebook friends. Fair enough, it hurts since we were friends at school for years and i defended them against other people, but i suppose i can see their point too.

I hope you manage to remove these friends so that both you and they are not hurt in the process Sparkle.

Bestest wishes

cheeky

Tilla I have sent you private mail.

Dream Angel, I really did appreciate what you said but I did realise doing the action physically could cause me problems. Yes, I'm just doing it mentally now.

Miss Hepburn, for some amazing reason I seem to be getting this extra strength and lets just say I'm now dealing with it. The last time I seen this preson they said a very nasty, horrible and offensive statement and I'm just going to think of this every time before I go to answer my phone or answer my door. None of it will be happening now. I felt a little down at the time they said what they said but right now I'm laughing as they really have put the nail in the coffin. The end of this, I think, will affect this person more than me. I am not going to kid myself but I will feel a little lonely until I re-jig my life and get a life. Since they have been in my life alot of friends have not been around. Not too sure if I want to pick these friends up again. Think I will just have to look for new ones. x

Thanks for your helpful comments.

[Miss Hepburn]

Originally Posted by Sparkle

Miss Hepburn, for some amazing reason I seem to be getting this extra strength and lets just say I'm now dealing with it. The last time I saw this person they said a very nasty, horrible and offensive statement and I'm just going to think of this every time before I go to answer my phone or answer my door.

YES!
You got it!
This is one of the secrets to recollect how terrible a person has
been so you keep your resolve!

You got it!

I'm proud of you - sounds like a backbone to me...

Btw, your strength and clarity will help this person --by taking abuse we are simply telling the person it is 'ok to abuse people with your rudeness'.
It IS helping them. Remember they are wounded, is all, from childhood; they learned this behavior - they were hurt, so now they hurt others - it is not "them" it is their pain spewing out...

The Universe needs your clarity and strength.
You go girl.

Sparkle, I agree with Miss H, hold onto the memory of how they hurt you next time they call. But, remember also that what they said is not a judgment on you but them, so don't hold on to any bad feelings.

You can do this. If you need to imagine all of us standing behind you when you don't answer the door. We are there with you giving you the strength.

As for re-building your life... how exciting??!?!?! Scary? Possibly, but you can create anything and draw wonderful people into your life... it took me long enough but I have managed it.. you can too!!!

Originally Posted by Miss Hepburn

Btw, your strength and clarity will help this person --by taking abuse we are simply telling the person it is 'ok to abuse people with your rudeness'.
It IS helping them. Remember they are wounded, is all, from childhood; they learned this behavior - they were hurt, so now they hurt others - it is not "them" it is their pain spewing out...

In some ways I feel this person is beyond help and I've not been too clear as to why they are not in my life now. I've used the horrible/nasty statement they said surrounding a situation as an _exscuse_ for me to remove this person from my life but truth of the matter is they have said alot of very negative and nasty things over a long period of time.

Out of interest Miss Hepburn is that just your own analysis on them being wounded as a child or is that coming through in a spiritual sense? I had a reading a number of years ago prior to knowing this person and I was told something like that in a reading I had.

Very sorry I've let this situation run for so long, that is now my biggest.

Thank you for your words.

Originally Posted by tilia

But, remember also that what they said is not a judgment on you but them, so don't hold on to any bad feelings.

I won't but I feel I need to hold onto bad feelings just until I know they are out my life for good.

Originally Posted by tilia

You can do this. If you need to imagine all of us standing behind you when you don't answer the door. We are there with you giving you the strength.

I think this person will still try and come back. I am dealing with it but I will imagine what you have said if they come to the door again. I have to deal with this once and for all as otherwise I'm not doing myself any favours what so ever. This other person favours, yes but that is no good to me. :-)

Originally Posted by tilia

As for re-building your life... how exciting??!?!?! Scary? Possibly, but you can create anything and draw wonderful people into your life... it took me long enough but I have managed it.. you can too!!!

Is a little scary but right now I just want to be alone and sort things out before moving forward. I don't want to be into a relationship too soon I want to see to some things of my own first. After that, yes I will be looking bring good people into my life. Had enough of those who take the mick.

Thanks.