I Can Never See Another Doctor!

[Shivani Devi]

I just had the worst experience...it was the first and last time I will ever see a Neurological Psychiatrist.

Of course, he asked me how I have been feeling and I pretty much said that I am suffering with painful inflammatory arthritis of the vertebrae in my spine and knees and I have costochondritis because the ligaments in my chest hurt and they are excruciating to the touch and it also hurts upon deep inhalation.

Then he looked at me and said "you have a history of mental illness...check yourself often, do you? self-diagnose on the internet do you? It's all psychosomatic, it's all in your head - it is repressed emotion and previous trauma manifesting as all these physical symptoms"...I was dumbfounded!

I said, "with all due respect, Dr Johnson - I know my own body, I know what inflammation is...what physical pain feels like and when pain has a physical cause or an emotional cause - so you aren't even going to check it out and test me for what I am presenting you with here?"

He said "I really can see no need...medical tests are unnecessary and intrusive - I am telling you what you have and you're just in denial"

To which I said "so, you are going to base your whole diagnosis on an assumption without doing any tests whatsoever? This can go both ways you know".

He's like "who's the doctor here?" and I'm like "who knows my own body here?"

So, with that, I said "If you aren't going to take me seriously, not even listen to me, I think I am just going to get a second opinion".

He said "good luck with getting any doctor to take you seriously when you have a history of mental illness. It says on your file that you have 'somatoform disorder' and that is what every doctor will look at now and they'll treat you according to it. No doctor will do any tests on you because of it - because it is unnecessary and intrusive".

I'm like "intrusive be damned! you mean 'expensive' don't you? I get this now! I am not in a private health care fund, so I get labelled with having a 'psychosomatic disorder' so the whole medical profession has a nice sounding medical name to treat me as its scapegoat so the government doesn't have to spend any money on me...I get it now".

He's like "it is what it is, why can't you just accept it?"

I'm like "because I am not stupid and my body and mind won't let me blindly accept a diagnosis, or in this case, a misdiagnosis, just because somebody with letters after their name refuses to do any tests on me to even prove me wrong and confirm what you are saying to be true...and you expect me to just 'take your word for it', without even so much as a physical examination to feel what I am feeling? I mean, x-rays and MRIs of my spine have already shown the medical profession I have severe scoliosis, fused vertebra and windows in nearly all of them - what more evidence do you NEED here?"

To that he started going round in circles again with "you have a history of mental illness, don't you? Why can't you accept that this isn't physical?"

I was like "well, maybe because it IS physical! and nobody will do any tests on me because they say it is 'intrusive' and 'unecessary'...maybe if I had private insurance, there would be doctors jumping over each other to do all these "unnecessary tests"...this is a sham! a medical scam of the highest degree! No wonder you are all called 'quacks' because that's what it is!"

So all that was recorded on my medical records with a basic 'do not treat' clause.

I have never been so angry in my life...so yes, now I am going to self-diagnose and treat myself according to my own diagnosis and if anybody in the medical profession has problems with it, tough luck.

/rant

[Shivani Devi]

Oh yes, he also asked me "do you ever disassociate from your body?"

I was like "yup, whenever I go astral travelling".

Then he goes - 'that proves you have a mental illness'.

IGNORAMUS! *grumbles*

[Blue Tiger]

Why a Neurological Psychiatrist? Why not an actual physician who deals with aches and pains?

Not trying to be a smart-alec, just sort of confused and ignorant.

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by Blue Tiger

Why a Neurological Psychiatrist? Why not an actual physician who deals with aches and pains?

Not trying to be a smart-alec, just sort of confused and ignorant.

Because when I first experienced all these symptoms and I could not walk at all, I was taken to hospital and treated by a neurologist who said it was 'functional neurological disorder' and yet, all the nerve tests...all the nerve conduction studies and the MRI's were all normal, so she passed the buck over to this Neurological Psychiatrist because she couldn't help me.

At that time, a year ago, I didn't know what the hell was going on with me so I just blindly accepted this.

Since then, I have become aware of my own symptoms, I have been tracking them and every single symptom I have is totally in line with a disease called ankylosing spondylitis...a simple blood test will prove it - but I have to be in a private health care fund to get the effing blood test.

[Shivani Devi]

A few months ago, I actually went to see my GP with all this. He just said "you are in the care of Dr. Johnson are you not? I know nothing about this thing called 'Functional Neurological Disorder' I am not a specialist...best off talking to him about it".

Suffice to say, I cannot afford the premiums of a private fund, but if I want answers, I am going to have to save up and pay the cost to find a good doctor and have those tests done...then if I am wrong, I will eat my hat. If right, I'll decide about a lawsuit.

[FallingLeaves]

Originally Posted by The Necromancer

Because when I first experienced all these symptoms and I could not walk at all, I was taken to hospital and treated by a neurologist who said it was 'functional neurological disorder' and yet, all the nerve tests...all the nerve conduction studies and the MRI's were all normal, so she passed the buck over to this Neurological Psychiatrist because she couldn't help me.

At that time, a year ago, I didn't know what the hell was going on with me so I just blindly accepted this.

Since then, I have become aware of my own symptoms, I have been tracking them and every single symptom I have is totally in line with a disease called ankylosing spondylitis...a simple blood test will prove it - but I have to be in a private health care fund to get the effing blood test.

I find that usually I am not allowed to get other people on 'my side'. Apparently, they see it as a fight for control. I dunno, maybe it is .
It is hard to get used to it though... for some reason I really, really want to be seen 'correctly'.

But it seems from other posts you've been making that you were told what to do next by someone who is likely to know better than the drs anyway? The flat out no from your dr could be a hint to quit goofing around with drs and get busy

[Shivani Devi]

Well, I asked the universe to help me because I am beyond miffed with this.

Basically, I do have a history of mental health issues and I am regularly seen by a Mental Health rehabilitation nurse who I like and I trust.

If I can get a letter from her...or get her to come with me when I go to see my GP, she can add some advocacy weight behind this.

It's the case where this thing has been misdiagnosed for so long now by a specialist and GPs won't touch me with a barge pole because of it.

It is medical profession arrogance of the highest degree.

There's also a stigma about those who seek to understand their symptoms by researching it all online.

There's a tendency for doctors to say "ANY form of self-diagnosis based off the internet just HAS to be wrong".

Who is to say it cannot be right for once?

This is what annoys me the most...I did my homework and got an "F" mark without the doctor even looking at my homework...

THIS annoys me the most.

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by FallingLeaves

I find that usually I am not allowed to get other people on 'my side'. Apparently, they see it as a fight for control. I dunno, maybe it is .
It is hard to get used to it though... for some reason I really, really want to be seen 'correctly'.

But it seems from other posts you've been making that you were told what to do next by someone who is likely to know better than the drs anyway? The flat out no from your dr could be a hint to quit goofing around with drs and get busy

Yep, I got the same message on the way home when that 'somebody who knows better than doctors' just burst out laughing and would not stop.

When it comes to my health, of course I want to be seen 'correctly'. Other than that, I wouldn't give a damn.

However, you are right. Time to take matters into my own hands...hence the title of this thread.

[H:O:R:A:C:E]

quit goofing around with drs and get busy

i agree.
take the reigns and be in charge of your own well-being The Necromancer .

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by H:O:R:A:C:E

i agree.
take the reigns and be in charge of your own well-being The Necromancer .

Yep, definitely. I get the message now.

What to tell others when they say 'go see a doctor' though?

The human race puts so much unfounded, unwarranted and blind trust in the medical profession that it's not funny.

I guess I can be true and say 'doctors cannot help me with this'.