IDENTIFYING 'MARKS' OF A SELF-REALIZED PERSON

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by JustASimpleGuy

I don't mean to offend, though some do take offense to some things I say or post. One of the most valuable lessons I learned early on when practicing mindfulness for secular benefit was the nature of offence and taking things personally. It's not the world that upsets us, but how we interpret and react to the world. Forgetting the spiritual nature of meditation that lesson alone is worth the practice.

I learned a lot about myself and the nature of my reactions to and interpretations of life. Very, very valuable. Yeah it's difficult to confront the faults, the arrogance, the ignorance within but well worth it. I'm convinced that, along with all my digging into consciousness, set the stage for my experience and subsequent shift in consciousness.

I suppose sometimes I take it for granted and at times perhaps I'm too frank. Sometimes I just don't feel like dancing around an issue and will dish out criticism but not from a mean-spirited motivation. In the end criticism is in the eye of the beholder. It can be taken as a negative or positive, regardless of its intent. That's another valuable life lesson. Oh, and undeserved criticism can be easily defeated with countervailing evidence and I'm always willing to reconsider any criticism I dish out. I'm certainly not omniscient.

Personally, I have never found you to be "offensive" at ALL! You take time to explain things logically and I admire that.

A few on here are like that....I feel like I can relax and be myself around such people like your kind self, Jyotir, Still Waters, Jonesboy, NoOne and sometimes Unseeking Seeker...everyone else on here is basically "forget it!" as far as I am concerned personally...there is like a "great divide" that exists between "group A" and "group B" and I don't know why.

All I know is that there are some people who never agree with me, I never agree with them either, but instead of ignoring me which I desperately WANT to happen, they follow me around, openly saying "OBJECTION!" each and every time I express an opinion.

Now, I have a question for you...I have asked this of many people and haven't got a response yet..

What if someone does something which annoys you and you tell them that they are annoying you..

To wit and which they say "if you are getting annoyed by what I do, that isn't my problem...maybe you should look within yourself to find out why?"

...and so, I do...I look within myself...I look DEEP within myself trying to find the answer...sometimes I will stew on it during weeks of intense introspection..in the end, I'll just get "nothing to see here...the dude was just being a huge jerk...case closed".

So what does it mean when you always get THAT reply when you look within? "It is everyone ELSE" and NOT you?"

Curious as to what you think about this.

Originally Posted by Shivani Devi

Now, I have a question for you...I have asked this of many people and haven't got a response yet..

What if someone does something which annoys you tell them that they are annoying you..

To wit and which they say "if you are getting annoyed by what I do, that isn't my problem...maybe you should look within yourself to find out why".

...and so, I do...I look within myself...I look DEEP within myself trying to find the answer...sometimes I will stew on it during weeks of intense introspection..in the end, I just get a "nothing to see here...the dude was just being a huge jerk...case closed".

So what does it mean when you always get THAT reply when you look within? It is "everyone ELSE" and NOT you?"

Curious as to what you think about this

Let me think on that one. I'm about to head home from Rochester this morning and it's a 4.5 hour drive. I drove here yesterday and with my dog for a holiday dinner with my work team. I have one last thing to do before I head out and that's check weatherunderground's forecast for select points on my journey home. It's through some large wilderness areas of the Adirondacks and before that the drive along the NYS Thruway is prone to some nasty lake effect snow squalls off Lake Ontario.

[NoOne]

Originally Posted by Shivani Devi

Personally, I have never found you to be "offensive" at all! You take time to o explain things logically and I admire that. A few on here are like that....I feel like I can relax and by myself around such people like your kind self, Jyotir, Still Waters, Jonesboy, NoOne and sometimes Unseeking Seeker...everyone else on here is basically "forget it" as far as I am concerned PERSONALLY..there is like a "great divide" that exists between "group A" and "group B" and I don't know why .

All I know is that there are some people who never agree with me, I never agree with them either, but instead of ignoring me which I desperately WANT to happen, they follow me around openly saying "OBJECTION!" each and every time I express my own opinion.

Now, I have a question for you...I have asked this of many people and haven't got a response yet..

What if someone does something which annoys you tell them that they are annoying you..

To wit and which they say "if you are getting annoyed by what I do, that isn't my problem...maybe you should look within yourself to find out why".

...and so, I do...I look within myself...I look DEEP within myself trying to find the answer...sometimes I will stew on it during weeks of intense introspection..in the end, I just get a "nothing to see here...the dude was just being a huge jerk...case closed".

So what does it mean when you always get THAT reply when you look within? It is "everyone ELSE" and NOT you?"

Curious as to what you think about this

Hi Shivani, thanks for that shout out.

I think the behaviour you describe is typical of those with an outsized ego and incidentally, Americans of the US persuasion. Not all of them of course, but it appears to be a general national characteristic. There are always exceptions of course, but as we say in Hungary, exceptions prove the rule.

BTW, I'm often told that I'm way too direct and rude and come off as angry and abrasive. That is in fact how people are in this part of the world. We are direct and say things as they are, even if it offends others. This does not go down well in those parts of the world (chiefly the Anglosphere), where fake politeness, political correctness and never saying what you actually think out loud are considered basic social skills that everyone must master at an early age.

Personally, I don't give a flying **** if anyone's offended by what I say, however it does limit the amount of time I want to spend wanting to interact with others.

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by JustASimpleGuy

Let me think on that one. I'm about to head home from Rochester this morning and it's a 4.5 hour drive. I drove here yesterday and with my dog for a holiday dinner with my work team. I have one last thing to do before I head out and that's check weatherunderground's forecast for select points on my journey home. It's through some large wilderness areas of the Adirondacks and before that the drive along the NYS Thruway is prone to some nasty lake effect snow squalls off Lake Ontario.

That's fine..no rush, you take your time and drive safely...if you could send some snow and rain to Sydney, Australia..that would be good.

We will chat again when you are free to do so. Take care on those slippery roads.

[iamthat]

Originally Posted by Shivani Devi

Personally, I have never found you to be "offensive" at ALL! You take time to explain things logically and I admire that.

A few on here are like that....I feel like I can relax and be myself around such people like your kind self, Jyotir, Still Waters, Jonesboy, NoOne and sometimes Unseeking Seeker...everyone else on here is basically "forget it!" as far as I am concerned personally...there is like a "great divide" that exists between "group A" and "group B" and I don't know why.

All I know is that there are some people who never agree with me, I never agree with them either, but instead of ignoring me which I desperately WANT to happen, they follow me around, openly saying "OBJECTION!" each and every time I express an opinion.

Alas, I see that I have failed to make it onto your list of acceptable people. Never mind, I still enjoy your posts.

Originally Posted by Shivani Devi

Now, I have a question for you...I have asked this of many people and haven't got a response yet..

What if someone does something which annoys you and you tell them that they are annoying you..

To wit and which they say "if you are getting annoyed by what I do, that isn't my problem...maybe you should look within yourself to find out why?"

...and so, I do...I look within myself...I look DEEP within myself trying to find the answer...sometimes I will stew on it during weeks of intense introspection..in the end, I'll just get "nothing to see here...the dude was just being a huge jerk...case closed".

So what does it mean when you always get THAT reply when you look within? "It is everyone ELSE" and NOT you?"

Curious as to what you think about this.

So someone says or does something which annoys you. What is stopping you from simply responding with calm detachment? Their words or actions cannot touch you unless you choose to be affected. And as a bonus, a calm detached response can sometimes really annoy the other person.

Peace.

Originally Posted by Shivani Devi

Now, I have a question for you...I have asked this of many people and haven't got a response yet..

What if someone does something which annoys you and you tell them that they are annoying you..

To wit and which they say "if you are getting annoyed by what I do, that isn't my problem...maybe you should look within yourself to find out why?"

...and so, I do...I look within myself...I look DEEP within myself trying to find the answer...sometimes I will stew on it during weeks of intense introspection..in the end, I'll just get "nothing to see here...the dude was just being a huge jerk...case closed".

So what does it mean when you always get THAT reply when you look within? "It is everyone ELSE" and NOT you?"

Curious as to what you think about this.

Well I made it home and it only took an hour longer than normal. Snow the entire way and once I got off the interstate it started out slick and only got worse, building to an inch or two standing accumulation on the road surface. I saw two snow plows over the last 120 miles or so and both were going in the opposite direction. LOL! At least I drive a Silverado so that's 4WD and almost 7,000 lbs.

As to your question it can be both. They can be jerks and they can be triggering a reaction in you that's slipping under your radar. I'm not speaking from a spiritual perspective but one of mindfulness. I've got a lot of basic secular mindfulness practice under my belt and I find a huge benefit is most of the time being able to be aware of the beginning of a reactive thought process being secreted by the brain. It's that delineation between witness consciousness and reflected consciousness.

Originally Posted by NoOne

I think the behaviour you describe is typical of those with an outsized ego and incidentally, Americans of the US persuasion. Not all of them of course, but it appears to be a general national characteristic. There are always exceptions of course, but as we say in Hungary, exceptions prove the rule.

BTW, I'm often told that I'm way too direct and rude and come off as angry and abrasive. That is in fact how people are in this part of the world. We are direct and say things as they are, even if it offends others. This does not go down well in those parts of the world (chiefly the Anglosphere), where fake politeness, political correctness and never saying what you actually think out loud are considered basic social skills that everyone must master at an early age.

I'm an American of the U.S. persuasion and I couldn't agree more. It's political correctness run amok and especially among the younger generations. It's infected the entire West, particularly the Anglosphere and seemingly the U.S. worst.

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by iamthat

Alas, I see that I have failed to make it onto your list of acceptable people. Never mind, I still enjoy your posts.



So someone says or does something which annoys you. What is stopping you from simply responding with calm detachment? Their words or actions cannot touch you unless you choose to be affected. And as a bonus, a calm detached response can sometimes really annoy the other person.

Peace.

How could I have forgotten you?

There are probably a few I forgot, those level- headed, Advaitic types who are logical, down to earth and are not full of bovine scatology...others just seem to have this huge chip on their shoulder that one needs to try and manouver around in any form of interraction and mostly, one cannot be bothered always doing so because it just takes way more energy than normal and I guess this is my own answer in a nutshell. I just never learned the correct way to deal with very "difficult" people.

[BigJohn]

Originally Posted by Shivani Devi

I just need to learn how to tell skeptical people whom I do not wish to communicate with because of irreconcilable differences in experience, understanding, lifestyle, cognition etc to "sod off and go to hell" nicely, without losing my "spiritual composure".

What use is speaking with another who cannot understand a single word you say, even though you are both presumably speaking English? and further explanation or elucidation does not help matters either, if anything, it just makes the whole "communication gap" wider leading to hostile animosity?

How do I tell another that they are only wasting their breath on me because I am totally incapable of having an "emotional reaction" and so, mind games which include verbal ploys to elicit one from me (e.g "you are delusional if you believe that") or any logical fallacy...and I know them ALL because yes, I DO have an eidetic memory (I am on the Autism Spectrum), is only a waste of our mutual time?

I just wish that some people would give up trying to get me to change my mind to THEIR way of thinking if I disagree with it and I don't CARE if they call me names because I refuse to stroke their ego...because the names are all mere projections of their wounded pride anyway...I just want them to go away...like I would want a pesky fly to go away while I am busy eating my lunch.

So, for all those who would like a comprehensive list of all the argument fallacies...here they all are and I have memorised every...single...one.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_fallacies

I see hundreds of logical fallacies in every thread I read or reply to on SF.

In another thread, you mentioned you have about 1/2 of the people on this
forum on your ignore list and the rest probably have you on their ignore list.

I started this thread.

If you have issues with a lot us, why insult us with your animosity toward us?

Why not go to another thread were you are welcome?

[inavalan]

Amusing ... what people interested in self-realization, or at least spirituality, can say!