My experience

[joy111]

This is my first thread. I have posted bits and pieces of my experiences , but after reading Yellow's thread and seeing similarities, I wanted to start my own. A little background: When I was twelve, my parents converted to mormonism and had me baptized. During that time, I had a very vivid dream that involved a golden stairway. There were a lot of people going up those stairs, but some did not. There was more to it than that, but I can't recall all of the details. I woke up feeling elated and told my mother. She told someone at the church and they came to the conclusion that i had received a vision and that it was about the LDS church being the one, true church and I was made to share it with the congregation. First of all, terrifying for a twelve year old, secondly, telling it, in that context drained me of the elation I had felt about it. We didn't attend very long after that. Then, only due to my getting into trouble at public school, I attended a Christian HS. I always questioned the belief in a vengeful God, so I turned my back on anything spiritual for all of my adult life.

I did have another dream when I was in my mid 20s. Very vivid and beautiful! I was running barefoot somewhere. I could hear a brook nearby and felt the presence of someone running with me. I couldn't see him, but felt intense love and joy. I was laughing because the grass was so soft and green. It was amazing. When I woke up, I cried because it was over. I never forgot that dream. I consider it a vision.

Last April, at the age of 46, I was contacted by what I believe to be spirit guides. My divorce had become final and I thought I was handling everything great. In reality, I was making poor decisions and an eating disorder I had for a long time, became very out of control. I felt weak and drained. Leading up to the contact, I experienced too many strange occurences to list, here. Weeks of waking up at 1:11, 2:22, 3:33, 4:44 and 5:55. I knew nothing of angel numbers or anything like that. Anyway, I hit a low point in my life. I woke up one night and heard a voice say, "I'm going to send a spirit to you." I wasn't afraid and felt like I knew who was speaking to me. After hearing two voices speak to each other for a bit, I saw the translucent form of a man sort of swoop down and come beside me. He told me he could read my mind and asked me about things that happened to me and things I've done. Some going back to my childhood. I remember telling him that I would bare my soul to him and it felt like my soul was being scrubbed clean. All the while, I felt something happening in my body. Something was going up and down the length of my body and pausing at certain areas. I remember thinking that I was being healed. There was also music involved. When the spirit left, I felt sort of hollowed out, but healed. For a couple of months, after that, I had daily telepathic communication with two, possibly three spirits. I was being encouraged to read self help books and eat healthy and start becoming more environmentally friendly. I was also being led to believe that I was going to meet my soulmate. I kept being told," When you're ready." Eventually, I experienced several days of what I call enlightenment. My mind became still and I felt joy.

That all gave way to me hitting another low. Just despair and lots of crying and anger. During that time, I sort of kicked the spirits out. I learned about affirmative prayer and starting rebuilding my life. I am very grateful to the spirits for helping me to save myself.

I only learned of spirit guides after all of this happened. I started researching what i had experienced and pieced things together. When I learned of chakras, I realized that what I had felt happening inside my body had to do with them.

Well, now I am awakened and on a spiritual path, but part of me keeps wondering how and why it all happened. With time, I'm learning to stop questioning it and just be thankful. I believe the Universe loves me. Sometimes, I want to try to communicate with my guides, but now I am a little fearful. Looking back, I have moments where I question my sanity during that time, but my inner voice keeps telling me that it was an awakening.



of control.

[joy111]

I forgot to kention that during the time I was in contact with the spirits, I was also having vivid dreams. The spirit i was in contact with most often had a sense of humor and it was apparent in these dreams, too. I was also being awakened to loud music.

[yellow]

Wow, thanks for sharing that Joy111. I can resonate with so much of what you have written and I imagine that I am not the only one to say that.

I guess we all struggle with the "awakening" process at times. I know I have. In some ways, I found it easier at the start (last September) as I just sort of accepted it and enjoyed it in almost a childlike way. I need to get back to that "viewpoint".

Anyway, you've had some wonderful experiences with your Spirit or Spirit Guide. That's great.

There are so many lovely helpful people on this forum to help out those of us who are just starting off and piecing together everything, so do have a good moan on here if you are struggling. Though I'm sure you won't moan as much as me LOL