The DF must stop energetic/label/belief forcing onto the DM.

[ForgedInFire]

This thread is for you DF. And it will trigger you. But remember this.. it is meant to if you find yourself triggered from reading this. And i am trying to have you to help yourselves to be a better you and change for the better.

I see many DF who repeat the same old toxic behaviors in an endless circle but expect the result/outcome to be different or change.You are mistaken and will receive nothing but more of the same. That is until you change yourselves AND stop these behaviors.

There is no fooling the universe with making statements such as "i am loving him unconditionally" and blameshifting all your issues that you perpetually avoid and dump it all onto the DM.

I assure you that if you are not in physical union with your beloved this very moment.. you are not "spiritually ahead" "more ready" and any other countless excuses that many DF cling to.

I see many DF who spend years and decades doing the same old and somehow believe that only some outside force will magically change things. You are mistaken. No changes will ever come as long as you continue to force your energetic, label and belief systems against the DM. No changes will ever come as long as you continue to allow your FEAR to lead the show.

i challenge you DF to stop all your energetic,label and belief systems that you force upon the DM. Not only that but the fact that many DF who all believe the same false ideas only strengthens them for the entire collective to deal with along with you.

In fact most of the tf theory as most can easily find anywhere is filled with lies, ego stroking and views seen through wounding.. it also highly likely teaches you not to the path of "union" but only that of separation. You cannot be on a path to union while following only the directions of separation.

"false twin flames" this idea and blameshifting tactic is beyond silly. And become a very old and played out excuse far too much. Along with the entire notion of blaming someone else as a "false twin flame" being immature.. no experience is ever false. You are NOT a victim either. You must stop avoiding your issues and putting them all onto someone else instead. And must stop seeking validation, attention and coddling for a supposed "false twin flame". This get out of responsibility jail card free must come to an end and it needs to be NOW.

"runner and chaser" another false and silly notion. It is an illusion. Our souls use closeness and distance to bring up every one of our triggers. I am sick to death of hearing "im the chaser and HE's the runner' NO you are not just a "chaser" and he is not just a "runner" But your belief system that you force upon the DM will give you exactly what you falsely believe in. Even if the overall idea of "runner and chaser" is entirely false you still manifest this experience to learn that it is an illusion. And that it is the souls tool to bring up triggering within you both. But more the "awakened twin" as they are the ones who in this lifetime agreed to do the more heavy healing work.

I highly suggest that you research into "anxious avoidant attachment" because if you think you are just a "chaser" you are wrong as you are both chasing and running away from your twin at the very same time.


"blaming and passing judgement" ive lost count at this point of how many DF who claim the love the DM unconditionally but in the next sentence pass blame and judgement onto him. "hes not ready" hes Not awake" Hes an idiot" "Hes a false twin".. oh yea sure we dont feel that energetically forced onto us .. yea sure.. go ahead and believe that all you want and then still wonder why we dont want nothing to do with ya!! And stop leaving evidence for them to find at a latter time.. like youtube comments. Nothing will get a DM gone faster then to find numerous incidents of backstabbing by his DF. Not worth the trouble it will cause so end that behavior asap.

I have mentioned many times before.. Only one twin will be "awake" for a long period of time otherwise the other cant fully perform the role they are to be.. a Mr or Ms a-hole triggermaster5000 to you. With all the liar tf and societal beliefs, many DF hold within themselves they dont realize that they are in most cases a magnet that is on full time repel against the DM. They are not going to get with the codependent program you desperately want them to fulfill either. It hasnt worked so far now has it? Nooooo....

The Tf community is very cutthroat. How many times have we all seen others say such things as.."Thats not your twin flame He's just a false twin flame" "not this lifetime" or talk down at others when a particular belief isnt easily embraced or at all by another person (even if it sounds utterly ridiculous)

This ultimately needs to stop. Not only does it burden others with negative energy.. it give us a bad name to others and have them looking at us like nutcases. STOP IT already!!

I think this is where ill leave off for now. I'm sure i can add plenty more here at a later time. I hope it serves you well..

[jmm44]

Thank you.

You know, the world outside of us is only a reflection of the world inside of us. You speak about the Divine Feminine collective blaming and passing judgement unto the Divine Masculine, yet are you not passing blame and judgement unto the Divine Feminine? Perhaps there is something here that you need to acknowledge.

We can all show more compassion and empathy to others, as well as to ourselves.

Much love and light to you.

[Inika]

seriously DF's just stop!

i had many times of blameshifting. used to slander him at times. never proud of it. it was like, avoiding of course. i was angry, yet instead of digging into the anger, i;d direct it instead. at him. i do get it, this threads point. Took so long to gather up the awareness of where it came from. i'd have my moments, but really, i have no right, he is not mine, i have no ownership of him or over him. I had no control, of myself, him or the situation. i'd spit venom. DF's, so many, have a lot of healing to do with their image, self esteem, security of self, etc. all their life they've been pointed at as this, or that, by family, friends, ex bf's. they have a role to play as a mother, a wife, a sister, a daughter. They hardly know who they really are but those roles and all the names they've been called, told they are. To have the one person who they 'thought' saw through the entire gender specific role and to the heart of who we are. take off, honed in home those same demeaning feelings they once experienced. of course. thats the point right? so at first reaction is 'omg what a (insert word for them here)!'

but yeah, growth. takes time.
if we can support DF's away from blameshifting and more into seeing deeper into their own self of where origins of pain triggers come from. we may get less 'he's an idiot' and 'how to remove a false tf' type of threads here.
most of these girls are looking for understanding due from similar to same experience, a kind of comfort that they are not alone in feeling the way they do. once 'over' that, they'll do the self healing.

[jmm44]

If you are implying that I was directing anger unto him, that was not the place I was coming from. Though, we all perceive things differently and that's okay. Perhaps your reaction wasn't even from my response. Regardless, I was simply bringing something to OP's awareness as he was bringing something into our awareness. We can only see our shadows when we project them onto others. And what you say about others, says more about you than them.

Your perception of me is a reflection of you; my reaction to you is an awareness of me.

Perhaps from my reaction, a part of me was indeed directing blame as well. So thank you lovelies. We can only learn from one another. We just need come from a place of kindness and consideration. Though I know this hasn't always been the case, but it is a choice nonetheless. After all, everything is a choice - It is the most powerful tool we have.

I hope we are all having a wonderful day or night

[Inika]

had nothing to do with you. sorry.

ForgedInFire, an excellent post if I may say so (and it's a subject over which I claim no guilt). Elsewhere (on the forum) I was pointing to this section wondering if it should even be here.
It seems so anti-spiritual: laden with toxin as you claim, its belief systems in their many hues encouraging obsession, demand, anguish, pain, buck-passing, adultery, jealousy, self-pity....

...and yet, here it is, a place that people can talk about these things, and if necessary find antidotes and detoxes if that's what they're looking for.

And of course for those whose relationships are twinned souls embraced by unconditional love because it would be the only way, rare as these real twins might be. A connection in the world of spirit it might also be but wrapping what may be assumption in spiritual jargon doesn't inspire confidence (surely, even to the participants). But the real twins can talk about their happiness, completeness.

I would never chase a bloke, but then I would never claim someone was "mine". We can't own people, not emotionally, not spiritually. They have to be there of their own choice. I draw fairly loose boundaries but add a clause in the T&C that I expect us to be allowed to work to the same rules. If a guy I'm with wants to mess about then I will start shopping around. I can pass the buck if things go off the rails because of a broken agreement.
I look to the day when this can all be explained neurologically.

Life is too short.

Just my views.

♥

[jmm44]

No need to apologize lovely. I thought that perhaps the meme and what you said directly below it was a reaction to my response. However, I can relate to the rest of your message as I did those same things in the past. It is all a learning curve though and like you said, growth takes time. We are all still learning.

[jmm44]

I would just like to share one more thing. We need to keep in the forefront of our minds that everyone is at a different stage in their journey - We all think differently and we can all be more compassionate, is all I'm saying . However OP, I'm sure your message will serve the DF's well. Yes, it may trigger some, however, if the DF's are willing to acknowledge those attitudes and behaviors and recognize they need to make a decision to change certain aspects and evolve, I'm sure they will appreciate your insight.

Overall, you were supportive and came from a loving place. Your intentions were pure.

I would like to share this gem as I goddamn love it:

"To let go implies to let go of something. The something that we're holding on to may simply be a creation of our mind, an illusory perception of something, and not the reality of the thing itself. Everything is an object of our mind and is colored by our perception. You get an idea, and before you realize it, you've become stuck in that idea. You may get scared because of that idea you're believing in. You might even get sick because of it. Perhaps that idea brings you a lot of unhappiness and worries, and you would like to be free. But it's not enough that you want to be free. You have to give yourself enough space and quiet to become free." - Thich Nhat Hanh

At any point we can change the direction of our lives. It all starts with a choice. Fear or love?

Amor vincit omnia
Love conquers all

[Aldous]

What's a divine female or male and why does it matter? It sounds like someone is trying to make a religion out of something.

[jmm44]

Why does it matter? Because at this time, we are learning to balance the two.