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14-11-2010, 12:11 PM
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Master
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Australia
Posts: 22,132
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I think one has to balance honesty and trust together, so the most honest inspires the most trust, because we are really talking about being truthful, which entails both honesty and trust.
I don't think banal brutal honesty inspires trust where a little white lie is more appropriate so 100% honesty is actually less truthful than a fair discretion.
__________________
Radiate boundless love towards the entire world ~ Buddha
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14-11-2010, 02:56 PM
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Master
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: New York, USA
Posts: 3,591
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Hello,
When being "honest" what is the honesty based on? Is one giving a true evaluation of the person or the situation or expressing a personal opinion?
If it is a personal opinion, then what determines whether that opinion or view point is the truth or not?
I feel it comes down to how much you trust the other person and whether what he/she expresses is reflecting what one observes or is willing to agree with.
Is 100% honesty really 100% honesty? Is honesty based on what ones belief, outlook, intent, or opinion?
Perhaps being discreet is being honest. One is truely respecting the others feelings and the group.
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14-11-2010, 03:01 PM
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Master
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: leicester
Posts: 1,562
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by shepherd
Apparently most people value honesty yet we all lie everyday.
Could you handle people being 100% honest with you all the time and could you be honest to others 100% honest all the time?
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No......... |
14-11-2010, 10:59 PM
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Master
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: here... now...
Posts: 11,896
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There is quite a difference between 'brutal' honesty... which is focused on what you think is true about someone else; and simple honesty... when one expresses what they think and feel, without projection or blame.
Xan
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Go within, beloveds. Go deep within to the Heart of your Being.
The Truth is found there and nowhere else.-Sananda
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14-11-2010, 11:18 PM
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Moderator
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Southwest, USA
Posts: 25,134
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by shepherd
...yet we all lie everyday.
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Going against the flow here but...
I do not lie everyday and reject that sentence into my consciousness.
It's not the truth.
That's how I work - if something is an untruth - I bounce it off me.
What can I say. It's not true.
,
__________________
.*I'll text in Navy Blue when I'm speaking as a Mod. :)
Prepare yourself for the coming astral journey of death by daily riding in the balloon of God-perception.
Through delusion you are perceiving yourself as a bundle of flesh and bones, which at best is a nest of troubles.
Meditate unceasingly, that you may quickly behold yourself as the Infinite Essence, free from every form of misery. ~Paramahansa's Guru's Guru.
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14-11-2010, 11:37 PM
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by psychoslice
Then that wouldn't be honest would it ?.
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It depends on the definition of 'honesty' from your personal dictionary  |
15-11-2010, 09:49 AM
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Suspended
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: UK
Posts: 9,658
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Xan
There is quite a difference between 'brutal' honesty... which is focused on what you think is true about someone else; and simple honesty... when one expresses what they think and feel, without projection or blame.
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That was nicely put Xan. 
As a poker player, 50% honesty is out of the question, let alone 100%. 
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15-11-2010, 10:18 AM
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Master
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Australia
Posts: 11,462
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by celery
It depends on the definition of 'honesty' from your personal dictionary |
Yes we all seem to use our personal dictionary to find the best words to cover up our dishonesty.
__________________
A belief system is nothing but poison to your capacity to understand. Good words are used to hide ugly things. – Osho
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15-11-2010, 10:26 AM
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Quote:
Going against the flow here but...
I do not lie everyday and reject that sentence into my consciousness.
It's not the truth.
That's how I work - if something is an untruth - I bounce it off me.
What can I say. It's not true.
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I know some others who think this too and maybe its true but all psychology studies show that despite how honest people claim they are, when filmed having conversations and watching it back, they were asked to point out any inaccuracies and sure enough there were plenty. We are actually hardwired within to be deceptive to others as well as ourselves.
People are so engaged in managing how others perceive them that they are often unable to separate truth from fiction in their own minds.
Its just the way it is. |
15-11-2010, 10:55 AM
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by psychoslice
Yes we all seem to use our personal dictionary to find the best words to cover up our dishonesty.
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I think we are speaking completely different languages here. I'm sorry. For me what people call brutally honest has nothing to do with honesty itself. For me it's nothing but a lack of tact and empathy toward others when talking.
From the harsh way you talk to me, I can guess what you are talking about, so no need to elaborate, I understand. Thank you for your time.
(By the way, this is an example of an honest reply and I'm sure you can find an example of a brutally honest one) |
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