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04-04-2007, 08:39 PM
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Help Maranda Heal
Chadley,
I thank you for your offer. I have come a long way but I have to admit to still dealing from time to time with the fallout of an abusive childhood. Especially since I am the oldest of five and have lived with watching my siblings deal with it too.
At my best I do take responsibility for my own life. But sometimes something will happen to make me remember what it was like back then when I was too little to do much about it. And it's like I am regressing back to that time. And everything I have learned, all the personal and spiritual growth, seems to simply slip away.
I'm okay with this if you are. And I would like for others to feel free to add their comments.
Last edited by Maranda : 05-04-2007 at 09:34 AM.
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04-04-2007, 10:00 PM
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Chadley,
My personal and spiritual growth has been a huge part of my recovery. I understand what you are trying to say. I come from the belief that we create our own reality from the thoughts we entertain. I understand that someone who worries about being a victim of something is more likely to become a victim. If we worry too much about debt we only end up with more debt.
Just when I think I have got it sorted, something happens that seems to throw me back and the anger that I thought was well under control rears it's ugly head.
You have read some of my posts, you will have some idea that I do come from the same direction as you.
Your views on this are much appreciated.
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05-04-2007, 04:12 AM
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Thinking of you xo ....
Dear Maranda
I was truly saddened to read that you had lived through an abusive childhood. I can understand that the difficult memories don't always fade as quickly as we would like them to sometimes. I believe that no matter how terrible an experience, there is always something that we can acquire from it, even if it is solely in the form of understanding. If the only thing that you gained is the ability to look into the eyes of another that has experienced a past similar to yours and say, "I truly understand how you feel", that alone can mean the world to a person who may have suffered as much as you.
I'm thrilled that you have become a member of this forum. I have read many of your posts. You are a wise girl, and your brightness shines through your words. I offer you a very warm and comforting hug from the heart I'm sure that you will find lots of loving support in this section, I just wanted to let you know that you were in my thoughts today xo.....
Lots of Love to you, Wind of Grace xo ....
Last edited by Wind of Grace : 05-04-2007 at 02:26 PM.
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05-04-2007, 09:49 AM
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Wind of Grace,
Thank you. I'm feeling much better today. I can still become overcome on occasion with memories. And, no harm to my siblings, but I do believe I might have let go of it all a long time ago if it hadn't been for the guilt of being the oldest and being the first to 'flea' so to speak. We all get on very well and are very close, have our own children now and grandchildren.
And yes you're right there are some blessings in the whole thing - All my childhood stuff began to rear it's ugly head and wanted to be dealt with in my twenties, have to admit to feeling so very low back then that the only thing that kept me on this planet was the memory of how my mum and the rest of us felt when my dad committed suicide. I knew I couldn't, wouldn't put my children through that. So I'm still here to tell my tale.
Thank you so much for those comforting words, I really needed them this morning. feeling much better now. Thank you.
I hope you'll drop by again soon.
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05-04-2007, 12:22 PM
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Hello Maranda,
First of all I will say that you're a great inspiration to many people by coming on this forum and telling us about your childhood. You're a source of light to those who may be going through touch times at this point of their life-you're proof that those who suffer from abuse can survive and can win:)
I have a lot of respect for people like you and it's people like you that I consider my role models and also people I look up to.
Those that have been through a lot and then are able to live their lives are the people with real character and strength and with real inspiration!
I would just say carry on being the amazing person you are and I sincerely wish you all the love and luck in the world-from my heart.
You will do well-you will conquer all the hurt from the past-you have come this far! You will never be alone as you are part of a community here at SF!
Bless you, take care and lots of love,
S xxxx
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05-04-2007, 01:53 PM
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S,
Thank you. I feel the warmth from here - UK.
Nice to know just how much support and encouragement there is out there.
God bless.
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