Buddhist Stories

[sky]

A BAG OF NAILS.......Once upon a time there was a little boy with a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he should hammer a nail in the fence. The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. But gradually, the number of daily nails dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.
Finally the first day came when the boy didn't lose his temper at all. He proudly told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone. The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence.
"You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out, it won't matter how many times you say 'I'm sorry', the wound is still there."

[sky]

I know where my anger comes from and why it happens, I know how to control it and stop it in its tracks most of the time. What puzzles me is why I feel it rising from the pit of my stomach, the sensation is very hot which I can feel going up and up till it reaches my head, when I feel the heat in my head then it's time to put a stop to it. It is a strange feeling and I have tried to work out why it affects me this way.... I know it must be energy rising and if I could control this energy before it even moves from my stomach then ( problem solved ) no more anger

[Serrao]

Originally Posted by sky123

A BAG OF NAILS.......Once upon a time there was a little boy with a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he should hammer a nail in the fence. The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. But gradually, the number of daily nails dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.
Finally the first day came when the boy didn't lose his temper at all. He proudly told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone. The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence.
"You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out, it won't matter how many times you say 'I'm sorry', the wound is still there."

To be without mental, emotional and physical scars is very difficult indeed.
But in my belief it is possible.

[sky]

Originally Posted by Serrao

To be without mental, emotional and physical scars is very difficult indeed.
But in my belief it is possible.

Mental scars are the worst I think but are possible to heal from

[naturesflow]

Originally Posted by sky123

I know where my anger comes from and why it happens, I know how to control it and stop it in its tracks most of the time. What puzzles me is why I feel it rising from the pit of my stomach, the sensation is very hot which I can feel going up and up till it reaches my head, when I feel the heat in my head then it's time to put a stop to it. It is a strange feeling and I have tried to work out why it affects me this way.... I know it must be energy rising and if I could control this energy before it even moves from my stomach then ( problem solved ) no more anger

The source of all emotion has its roots.

Pull out the roots. Beneath old anger is often sadness unresolved. Anger is the force holding down and in. That is all. When resolved fully the energy in that feeling space becomes your passionate feelings, your assertiveness, your love, your dance no longer contained by the force of anger. It is the force of your creation. Free flowing more readily, not contained by ideas it has to (hold back) or in.

Sacral chakra work is the best form of release I have learned-the core of self.

Wounds harbouring, not willing to feel fully and let go fully because anger maintains "control" of hidden emotions. Subtle as it may be, control is often noticed in the one "not" allowing fully the fullness of their feeling state. More believing it is something better contained or needs to "stay down"..When the volcano is ready the core of self will erupt even as you might perceive you can contain that energy and heat, the source of your creative flow will find itself one way or another to flow up and out.

I think I remember that time, when mine arose. I wrote something like two hundred poems in two weeks, to release the force of creation, emotion and containment. It was very freeing, to let go in this way. Energy is part of the totality of being. It wants to be acknowledged even if other teachings tell it to stay down.

[Gem]

It's interesting that anger is associated with the body. It's a surface level gross feeling, but when the mind gets honed and feels through the subtle layers of sensation, the root cause on the emotional level starts to come into sight. We all have some deep wounds, some of which are pre-language, as we recollect both in memory and re-collect the pieces together to make whole. It's not a war, but a sense of kindness, and I think Thich Nhat Hanh wrote a whole book about it once. I'm pretty sure Pema Chodron had something to say on it, too.

[Within Silence]

Originally Posted by sky123

I know where my anger comes from and why it happens, I know how to control it and stop it in its tracks most of the time. What puzzles me is why I feel it rising from the pit of my stomach, the sensation is very hot which I can feel going up and up till it reaches my head, when I feel the heat in my head then it's time to put a stop to it. It is a strange feeling and I have tried to work out why it affects me this way.... I know it must be energy rising and if I could control this energy before it even moves from my stomach then ( problem solved ) no more anger

It has been said that anger is just fast moving energy, and the faster energy moves the greater its potential to speed away "out of control." Fast moving energy is hot, slow moving energy is cool. If you want to warm up you move around, and if you want to cool off you sit around, hence movement builds heat while lack of movement reduces it.

If we look at the words we use to describe one who is angry; "they flew off the handle" "he was out of control with rage" "his anger over came him" "he is such a hot head" etc. we see that in fast moving energy is the lack of patience, the lack of mindfulness, the lack of peace, which are the lack of balance. Thus, to move too fast or to slow is to be imbalanced, but just to be is to not be moved this way or that, hence to reside in the center of the circle. Not always easy too do, but instead of trying to control anger, perhaps it may be more wise to look into it, observe it, see what is at the root of it. In understanding the root of anger we can then stop feeding it.

[Michelle11]

Originally Posted by Within Silence

It has been said that anger is just fast moving energy, and the faster energy moves the greater its potential to speed away "out of control." Fast moving energy is hot, slow moving energy is cool. If you want to warm up you move around, and if you want to cool off you sit around, hence movement builds heat while lack of movement reduces it.

If we look at the words we use to describe one who is angry; "they flew off the handle" "he was out of control with rage" "his anger over came him" "he is such a hot head" etc. we see that in fast moving energy is the lack of patience, the lack of mindfulness, the lack of peace, which are the lack of balance. Thus, to move too fast or to slow is to be imbalanced, but just to be is to not be moved this way or that, hence to reside in the center of the circle. Not always easy too do, but instead of trying to control anger, perhaps it may be more wise to look into it, observe it, see what is at the root of it. In understanding the root of anger we can then stop feeding it.

I like this.

Anger in and of itself isn't the issue. The more we deny our anger the stronger it gets but it is a necessary emotion for us to learn how to set boundaries and stand up for ourselves. So I agree with Within Silence. It's more a matter of how we work with it as opposed to abolishing it from our lives.

I tend to see it in two lights, healthy anger and toxic anger. Healthy anger is firm and direct while toxic anger tends to attack as a means of defending the self. Mindfulness can help us recognize the anger, question the roots of it and help us process any toxic anger so that we can approach the conflict with a rational head and respect for any other parties involved which is more likely to lead to a mutual resolution. If we haven't been shown how to respond to anger in a healthy way it can be hard to master but with practice it can. But simply trying to abolish all anger from our lives is unhealthy for us in the long run.

[sky]

Originally Posted by Gem

It's interesting that anger is associated with the body. It's a surface level gross feeling, but when the mind gets honed and feels through the subtle layers of sensation, the root cause on the emotional level starts to come into sight. We all have some deep wounds, some of which are pre-language, as we recollect both in memory and re-collect the pieces together to make whole. It's not a war, but a sense of kindness, and I think Thich Nhat Hanh wrote a whole book about it once. I'm pretty sure Pema Chodron had something to say on it, too.

Anger is associated with the liver which is a wood element, the liver is in the lower dantian so I must have to much chi collecting there and not moving around freely when I feel angry

Wood swells with heat and the heat rises which makes perfect sense as I feel the sensation of heat going up to my head and thats the time I need to control myself.

Now I need to find a way of stopping the energy from getting stagnant, overheated and rising. Stagnant energy causes dis-ease, anger causes disease...

Don't need anymore nails in my fence, anger causes as much damage to yourself as it does to the recipient.

[Still_Waters]

Originally Posted by sky123

A BAG OF NAILS.......Once upon a time there was a little boy with a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he should hammer a nail in the fence. The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. But gradually, the number of daily nails dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.
Finally the first day came when the boy didn't lose his temper at all. He proudly told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone. The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence.
"You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out, it won't matter how many times you say 'I'm sorry', the wound is still there."

That is an awesome story that I had not heard before. Thank you very much for sharing it.