Have I met my twin flame?

[Myblueisyourblue]

First off, many thanks in advance for reading. I'm quite new to this and would really appreciate the wisdom of your experience.

I'm hoping that you can help me sort out whether or not I've met my twin flame.

We did happen to meet on a dating app, which strikes me as decidedly un-spiritual, but it was as though, if you had asked me beforehand to imagine my ideal partner, it would have been him to a T. Same favorite novelist, same favorite band, same favorite films, even the same weird freckle at the center of our noses. We went on a few dates, and things between us seemed to be speeding along, until all of a sudden he broke it off because he didn't feel ready to date. We only dated for a few weeks, but two months later, I still couldn't let the idea of him go. I had a very strong feeling that he was meant to play more of a role in my life than he had yet. (I only just now discovered that a period of separation is actually part of the twin flame journey.) I went on several dates with other people in the meantime, but every night, I'd come home disappointed that thy weren't him.

So, last week, I ran into him at a coffee shop. We just stared at each other from across the room, neither of us having the guts to say anything. I decided to message him afterwards, and before I knew it, we were making plans together.

We had an absolutely lovely time. The conversation flowed so naturally and freely, and I felt like this amazing version of myself: sparkly, charming, beautiful. We ended the evening by seeing Godzilla: King of the Monsters, which is the worst movie ever, so all I could think about was how overwhelming was the urge to reach out and touch him. I've been out with plenty of people in my day, and it's rare for me to feel like this.

But we hadn't defined it as a date. We were just "hanging out," but at the end of the night we hugged (my knees shook), and he told me that he's down to hang out with me anytime. My sense, at this point, is that he's drawn to me, but is still bogged down by all of the anxieties that made him distance himself in the first place.

I, on the other hand, am so ready. I spent those months meditating, seeking closure from past relationships, working on my intuition and feeling the energy surrounding me.

I feel like this MIGHT have the hallmarks of a twin flame relationship, but I think he has more self-exploration left to do, and I wonder if twin flames can be on different pages in their journeys?

What do y'all think?

[Naaria]

In my experience, I knew right away. I didn't have the words for it but when I learned about twin flames, he and I both knew it right then and there. So my first thought is if you have to question it then maybe it isn't? But my experience doesn't dictate what is or isn't true.

One's interests and physical qualities don't necessarily make one a soulmate, much less a twin flame. In my honest opinion, it sounds like attraction, and the typical fun, exciting feelings of a new relationship. Not that there's anything wrong with that of course!

Twin flames can absolutely, definitely be on entirely different pages. In fact... if you weren't on different pages, you and/or your twin may not even be here in the first place.

[Myblueisyourblue]

Thanks for your reply. I do totally get what you're saying, and I did assume it was just attraction whenever he broke it off initially. I wanted to just forget completely about him, like I had with every other failed Tinder relationship, but that honestly wasn't in the cards. His name started popping up everywhere--the first song iTunes shuffle played when I got in the car, the title of the movie Netflix was trying to get me to watch when I turned on my TV, a friend telling me to read a book with his name in the title...it's like I wasn't allowed to forget about him. I also couldn't help but notice that the last guy I dated was named Nathan, but his name is JONathan (the same name in Hebrew, but the former means "gift" and the latter means "gift from God), so it's like things were building up to me meeting him before I even realized it.

The real clincher for me is that meeting him catalyzed this whole journey for me, where I was finally like, "Okay, I'm going to figure this all out. I'm going to figure out my beliefs, I'm going to work on reading the signs, I'm going to learn how to listen to the universe and use my intuition once and for all, and I'm going to exorcise the demons from my past." I understand now that this is a key component of the twin flame encounter, but I didn't realize it at the time. All of this while he was the first thing I thought about in the morning and the last thing I thought about at night. I was honestly confused about why I was so stuck on him when we only knew each other for a minute.

And in those few months when we weren't talking, I had constant, constant butterflies in my stomach. I don't even like the term "butterflies" because it seems so friendly, but this was like an overwhelming feeling of something coming, like I was waiting for something that was just about to crest the horizon, but I couldn't what it was yet. Like a tremendous amount of energy that was enough to make it difficult for me to get through the day.

So I dunno, there is definitely something important about this relationship. No doubt about that. I guess I'm just not super well-versed in how twin flames/soul mates/etc. work, so I wanted to check in about which might best describe what I'm going through.

[TwinFlame1984]

i think the problem here is you trying to define this in certain terms. Why do you want him to be your twin flame? Is it because twin flame love supposed to be mutual? Why can't you just call it love? You seem to want to put this in some kind of box where you could clearly define the rules/the components/the ins and outs. Nobody can give you clear answers, soul connections are not clearly defined, no matter what "twin flame experts" will tell you.

[Myblueisyourblue]

I don’t. I don’t want anyone to be my twin flame who isn’t. I am just trying to make sense of a situation that’s making me feel all sorts of things that I haven’t felt before and don’t understand. It feels like you’re trying to “call me out” or something, which is not helpful.

[TwinFlame1984]

Originally Posted by Myblueisyourblue

I don’t. I don’t want anyone to be my twin flame who isn’t. I am just trying to make sense of a situation that’s making me feel all sorts of things that I haven’t felt before and don’t understand. It feels like you’re trying to “call me out” or something, which is not helpful.

you know how many people felt something they haven't felt before? all of them:) it's called love. trying to "make sense" of it and put it in a certain box, especially if it's a spiritually loaded concept like twin flames, seems to put a whole host of expectations and "rules" on the "connection". which a lot of times leads to a disappointment, because the other party does not "comply". I'm guessing you were expecting to hear something else, vs somebody warning you against putting your relationship in a particular spiritual shelf.

[Dargor]

Probably not. It isn't unusual for women to think of that cute sweet guy as their twinny flamy, only to end up somewhat disappointed when the dung hits the fan. So you might want to be cautious about who you trust and consider giving such a label. However, the same thing counts for men as well.

[JosephineB]

Originally Posted by SlayerOfLight

Probably not. It isn't unusual for women to think of that cute sweet guy as their twinny flamy, only to end up somewhat disappointed when the dung hits the fan. So you might want to be cautious about who you trust and consider giving such a label. However, the same thing counts for men as well.

You're a naughty but funny man.

[Myblueisyourblue]

Wow, ok, so I guess this is a place where you dismiss women and tell them they’re being silly. I’m not just some girl who feels like every crush she has is her “twinny flamy.” I’m a 33 year old woman who knows what it feels like to be in love, and who has been in very long term, serious relationships, but who has never felt this kind of connection or has noticed this many synchronicities before.

Notice that no one has responded to any of the actual details I’ve given. Just went straight to saying that I’ve got a little crush.

[Dargor]

I'm just being objective. But don't worry, I'm like that to everyone. So don't think you're any special.