Would I ever have children...?

Dear I can understand ur feeling,but please try to understand the human psychology of satisfaction.Our tongue always tends to figure out the odd particle of food stuck in our teeth.It never tends to move towards the other beautiful even teeth.We always cry n focus on what we do not have,n never thank God for what he has offered us.

[Sarian]

Spirit...I always wanted children someday...I imagined and even felt sure I would have three children...a boy, then a girl, then another boy...but wasn't sure if I felt that was what I would have because I have 2 brothers, an older one and a younger one...and I'm the girl in the middle. I got married. The husband seemed less than interested as he had two from a previous marriage. Finally he said okay. I tried for many years...nothing. Went to a doctor, and tests were done that were quite invasive and I saw what I looked like inside. I had no idea they were even fallopian tubes. I said what's that? I could have cried. He did a laparoscopy to try and see if anything could be done...he said it was pretty doubtful I'd have children as i was scarred up pretty badly inside.

I was devastated. My best friend is catholic and told me that this healing priest was coming. Well, I was desparate that I would try anything. i have heard much about him. I believe his name was Matthew Swizdor? I am not sure, I don't think he's alive anymore. Anyway, I went to him and people he laid hands on were falling backwards like you'd hear about at pentecostal revivals or something... He came to me and I was afraid, but then I felt this warmth in my forehead and saw it travel down into my chest...it was an orange and white swirl. It got very, very warm, hot really. I then got scared and pulled back. I think because i was afraid I'd fall like others and I thought it was fake when I saw it happening to others...or that they got 'caught up in the excitement' or something... Well, that very same month I ended up getting pregnant. My doctor was shocked. Two years later I tried again, nothing. My doctor said he didn't know how I had the first one, but sent me to a fertility expert. He was claimed to be one of the best in my country. He performed a laparectomy on me and it took 4 hours. he said he did not know how I even had my son as I was so full of adhesions and lesions that it took him that long just to pull the strands apart...he said they were liked overcooked spaghetti inside me. I asked if I would be okay and be able to get pregnant again. He said he really didn't think so, but didn't like to say no, but he said if lucky, maybe in a year or so... I was sad...left and then I just asked God to please let me have my daughter...I was not religious, but I am spiritual. I got pregnant that month..it was a hard pregnancy, but I had my daughter and she was born on my birthday. :-)

Call me greedy I guess, but I was supposed to have my 3rd child, my son...I asked God when he would come...I got pregnant or so I thought but about a month later, I was out and about and I experienced severe cramping and had a miscarriage..at least I felt sure it was, who knows...I stood in the shower and I cried...I told God to please let me get pregnant and have my son or take away this urge I have to get pregnant again... I got pregnant again that month...so I have all three of my children, a boy, a girl, another boy...last son was born on my older brother's birthday. Anyway.... I think about it often and why I had my kids and so many other woman can't have any...sometimes I really believe my kids are soulmates and we've all traveled together because here I have 3 kids and we get along fabulously...I can't imagine life without them...the father of them...well, I don't know why I ever married him, but if I didn't...I wouldn't have the wonderful ones I have now...

I don't want to give you false hope, but never think never...because you never know...and if it doesn't happen, and maybe this is cliche...there are children in desparate need of a family....pray either way...that you find the rest of your family...whether they come biologically or another woman had to birth them for you, you just have to reach them...or they you! Good luck and many blessings to you.

[GoddessLove]

Umm, this may sound really weird. But yesterday there was a post- a mini reading game- and I commented that I saw a woman sitting at a beach writing in her journal and she was very stressed out bc she wanted kids. Well, there was an angel behind her and maybe 3 kids running to the right side of her--but she could not see them. I took that as a sign that she would get her wish or that her wish was there but she could not see it...maybe that came to me on account of op. I erased my post bc it was so irrelevant to the game despite the fact that I felt the need to share it...But now I see why the vision was so strong! I am NO psychic, so don't hold me to it, but I just know that you are heard!!! That post was for you op...look around for the answers.

Originally Posted by suchi

Dear I can understand ur feeling,but please try to understand the human psychology of satisfaction.Our tongue always tends to figure out the odd particle of food stuck in our teeth.It never tends to move towards the other beautiful even teeth.We always cry n focus on what we do not have,n never thank God for what he has offered us.

It is odd that I come across this little tidbit: I have been picking at a spot in my tooth for hours with my tongue. My tongue is sore and I have been stressing about my teeth. I guess this means: stop.

[LadyVirgoxoxo]

Sarian, your story was so beautiful and inspiring!

[Sarian]

Thank you, LadyVirgoxoxo. :-)

I would never do "prediction" readings unless using a very safe/specific method (like dreaming divination) and I don't recommend doing prediction readings...I mainly just do current situation/how to approach an event/person things. Maybe the board was a lie, maybe not. People make their own answers. You can still be a mother through adoption! Hope is never gone. Keep that in mind :) If you need additional help, just PM me. This may be rushed since I'm in a hurry. Bless you! And beautiful biography, Sarian.