Demonic Possession is REAL!

[Shivani Devi]

As a qualified psychologist and a die-hard skeptic about this, I never believed it whatsoever.

I put it all down to superstitious beliefs originating in the 'Middle Ages' and attributed to a lack of any medical or psychiatric knowledge combined with ergot-infested rye and a penchant for the over infatuation with eternal damnation....in other words, a load of misinformed religious woo based upon nothing substantial whatsoever.

Fast forward to my recent past...depression and anxiety combined with fits of anger and frustration which is getting worse by the day...so I went off to see my doctor about it.

Unfortunately, my regular doctor was on extended leave and I got a pretty unsympathetic locum with an atrocious bedside manner. He studied my notes, gave me an examination, asked me questions about why I was feeling so depressed...

Yeah, so he goes "old dogs die, if you speed you'll get fined, people owe money everywhere, arguments with other people happen, we tend to get a bit tired and achy when we age...everything you are telling me is just a normal, common fact of life - deal with it!"

He went on to say that there is absolutely nothing wrong with me besides being a hypochondriac and having attention deficit disorder...but if I really feel that an anti-depressant will help me, he'll prescribe one, but in his professional opinion that I don't need any meds at all, I just need time to process all this.

I then reminded him that hypochondriasis is actually a classified mental illness in the DSM V, and if that is his diagnosis, what about a referral to a psychiatrist to cure me of my hypochondriasis? that would be the most logical thing to do, would it not? to which he said 'no, not really'.

Then I went 'okay, what if I went to a priest and told him I needed an exorcism because I am possessed by a demon?' and he said that was the most logical thing to do in my case and that would help me the most of all.

So yes, I have fully accepted it now. There's nothing wrong with me apart from being totally possessed by a really nasty demon that causes all kinds of bodily aches and pains doctors cannot find despite numerous tests and mental anguish that doctors said is 'part of the normal human condition'.

So, medicine and medical advances are no better now than they were back in the 14th and 15th century....maybe I need to have my whole body covered in leeches to suck out all of the 'bad blood'...

Yeah, I used to laugh at those who said 'help me, a demon has possessed me' thinking 'go and see a doctor for goodness sakes'...until it happened to me and I am still possessed and haven't gotten over it yet.

[Miss Hepburn]

You need someone that can get rid of this entity...they exist
they are out there...there are very gifted people that know about this.

[Kerubiel]

The way i see it is we can activate any knowledge we wish to activate (give life and form to). We can give power and belief to anything we wish to. By controlling the knowledge and beliefs you can cure anything, remove anything, solve any problem and follow any solution. the problem is people believe in garbage forms of knowledge and end up being possessed by that knowledge. The knowledge ends up ruling you instead of you deciding and ruing over the knowledge you choose.

[Shivani Devi]

Thank you both for your replies.

I have been thinking a lot about this last night...and what I really need to do is to get up off my backside and travel into either Sydney or Melbourne and just shop around for days/weeks until I can find a doctor who will listen to me and treat me like an important and worthwhile person.

Maybe I will also need some kind of advocacy service working on my behalf to ensure I get the best medical treatment I deserve and require.

I am profoundly Autistic....every doctor I have ever met comes off as sounding extremely arrogant, self-righteous, overbearing, aloof and controlling of, yet oblivious to whatever situation is going on around them....even my regular doctor is like this...I have met hundreds of doctors and they are all like this....however, absolute generalisations do not exist (so I have been told) - so there must be one doctor out there in the whole of Australia who is not...I just have to travel around outside my immediate 30km radius to find one....even if I have to travel 500kms to find one, I could still go and visit that doctor once a month.

The other alternative...or the first thing I should do is go and speak with the Autistic foundation/Autism people to see if they have any recommendations as to general practitioners who don't freak Autistic people out...doctors whose cold attitudes, overbearing pomposity and 'god complexes' don't totally overwhelm us to the point of emotional overstimulation.

At the moment, in regards to 'being ruled by knowledge' - I have completely forgotten most of whatever I knew only a few months ago - it's all totally gone now...only the basic survival stuff is there and I cannot think about physics...I cannot do a crossword...I cannot read a book...anything that requires 'brain cells' basically shuts my mind down totally, leaving me staring at whatever I am staring at.

I just sat and stared at a tree for three hours yesterday...I wasn't meditating...I wasn't thinking....a tree was in my line of view, so I just decided to keep it there for a while...and I just 'switch off' like that at any time now...even during the middle of a conversation...even when I am driving and I have to pull over when I feel it coming on...it's like a waking death.

Yet, there is no joy, no bliss, no love, no 'god realisation' no 'altered state of consciousness' there is nothing...no thought and no feeling whatsoever...the awareness isn't even there...it's like being in a conscious coma.

So, when anything bad happens to me now, I don't get angry or upset anymore...I have gone way past that point to 'yeah, it figures...why should I even expect anything more than this? the universe is se effing predictable it isn't funny anymore'.

Case in point....

A few days ago, I went to illegally dump some garden waste way out in the bush...out in the outback scrub...

I went as far away from a populated area as possible...out into the dense forest...I went off the main highway onto a side road...then off that side road onto a dirt road...then off that dirt road onto another dirt road...I was about 50kms away from any town or dwelling and on an old fire trail that nobody ever uses.

I sat there, in my car for about 10-15 minutes...not a single vehicle passed by...not one (not that one ever would)...

So, I get out of my car, walk around to the boot, open it up, take out the bag of rubbish...and what do you know? at that exact moment, six cars passed by on the fire trail, with a distance of about 300 metres between them...

I put the rubbish back in the boot, went and sat in my car for another half an hour...not a single car passed by for that whole 30 minutes...so I went 'right! let's try this again'...get out of my car, walk around to the boot, open it up, take out the bag of garden waste....at the exact same time as I did this, 4 cars passed by on the fire trail...so I put the rubbish back in the boot and went and sat in my car again...not a single car passed by after that.

This whole thing kept up for 4 freaking hours! the only time cars would pass by on that old abandoned fire trail was at the exact moment when I opened my car boot up - without fail - about half a dozen times - without fail!

In the end, I just took the rubbish out in full view of everything that was passing by and just dumped it then and there thinking 'I don't effing care anymore...I don't give a damn...I hate the world...I hate the universe...I hate God...I don't effing care about anything anymore...and if I get fined, I won't care about that either...if I go to jail, I don't care...if I get killed in jail...good!.

I am either possessed or I have been cursed...so until I figure out which one applies, I'm going to try and find a doctor for adults who is like 'Patch Adams'...

[lancing]

Have any of your doctors specialized in the transpersonal field? That rubbish story is simply hilarious! Although, I'm sure it's quite...maddening.

[Blue Tiger]

I think your idea about reaching out to the Autism Foundation/Autists is the best place to start.

Sadly very few medical types seem to appreciate how autism affects people who are no longer chlidren. You are educated, autistic, and in REAL pain, whether it's physical, psychological or psychsomatic. Surely there are other autistic people who experience similar issues.

That's where I'd start. Wishing you all the best.

[Khalli]

I guess it is time for me to really look into what autism is so I can understand it.

thinking 'I don't effing care anymore...I don't give a damn...I hate the world...I hate the universe...I hate God...I don't effing care about anything anymore...and if I get fined, I won't care about that either...if I go to jail, I don't care...if I get killed in jail...good!.

This worries me more, I've been there and I know what this can lead to.
Sorry I haven't replied earlier, gonna pay later for going swimming all day without sunscreen.

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by khallianen

I guess it is time for me to really look into what autism is so I can understand it.



This worries me more, I've been there and I know what this can lead to.
Sorry I haven't replied earlier, gonna pay later for going swimming all day without sunscreen.

Thanks my sweet. Yes, this will help you understand me a bit more and why I act/behave the way I do.

As for the quote - I mean, how can any doctor worth their salt deny I have depression after such things? honestly?

None of the doctors around here know anything about Transpersonal stuff...or CBT...or anything other than 'take two aspirin and call me in the morning' (to coin a phrase). I'd rather take my chances with a 'witchdoctor' pointing the bone at me.

However, Blue Tiger has confirmed what my logic already told me. I need 'specialist care' that I cannot obtain within my area, so I need to contact the Autism people and find out where the nearest service provider that meets my special needs can be located.

On the plus side, I went and saw a priest today...got advised that I need to help others and do charity work because my 'bad deeds' have started outweighing all my 'good deeds' now and that's why all this stupid stuff keeps happening to me...it's universal 'payback time' and has nothing to do with being possessed or cursed..I'm just taking way too much advantage of situations I'm not meant to be taking advantage of etc

[Khalli]

I have said if you need to have someone to talk to, I am available.

And are you sure it isn't some of the new situations in your life that has upset the balance?

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by khallianen

I have said if you need to have someone to talk to, I am available.

And are you sure it isn't some of the new situations in your life that has upset the balance?

I don't know what it is, to be honest with you.

However, I seem to have gone from total obscurity to being noticed in a negative way.

I have always had the luxury of getting away with anything I wanted, because I was so invisible that nobody ever gave a damn...I didn't exist...nobody noticed anything I did...I felt like a ninja.

All that has changed now due to this extra energy...now I seem to be the 'centre of attention' and 'the main attraction' and for a total introvert, this is going to take some getting used to...once I get over the whole 'paranoia stage'.