When you Feel like Death but its not a Death

[Lynn]

Hello

Have you ever felt like death was on the doorstep but it was not death in the way you were heading for your last breath in and out. More it was death on a level that makes no real sense?

I was so sick for a few months, in and out of hospital and the ER so many times. In so much pain I was loosing whom I was as a person. I too was put on some medication that gave me suicidal thoughts. I knew what that feeling was as I was in that dark place at 16. This was different though not depression just that feeling of "being done". I would say I was going "out to pasture" that is where they take an old horse right, so that is where I am going. I sort of recall the conversations but too a part of me was "gone".

I finally say a Dr that diagnosed what was wrong and I am on the mend again with the right course of action and not medications. It never was a nerve so those medications only flared things up more. I am going backwards now to heal. Was told I have a long road going forwards. I will get there.

A part of me still feels in that "dead zone" like I have lost some of me. Not that want for life more on a Soul level. Like I have to slow down? So now its part time at work, and I am so bored at HOME ! Yet I feel I had to do that.

Lynn

[aiken]

Hey Lynn! That's because the macrophages fighting the infection in your body send out cytokines. These cytokines can affect the parts of your brain that deal with emotions and reasoning. So the next time you feel awful when you're sick, remember that this is your body's way of protecting you from getting worse.

[AngelBlue]

Hi Lynn... YES I absolutely DO know how that feels . And trust me I DO know.
Put it this way , when you think you are going to die but are in too much pain to even think about your children and you just want it all to end....
That's when you know.
This happened to me in 2020 .

I wish you well Lynn and all the strength in the world.

[CosmicWonder]

I wish you health and good luck Lynn,

Kind regards,
CW

Edit:
Can we mean anything to you? Prayers? Thoughts? Energy? Not sure how to help.

[Native spirit]

I know what you mean I have been there more than once.
If i go to the doctors i always tell them what is wrong I never ask them
I self Diagnose all the time and I'm never wrong either.

I have sued the doctors before and I wouldn't hesitate to do it again
I have even told doctors to get back into Training because they know nothing
But I have been there,
sometimes you come out of it and wander how you did it.


Namaste

[boyce]

Does anyone know the old saying "An old gate can creak on forever."?

[Lynn]

Originally Posted by boyce

Does anyone know the old saying "An old gate can creak on forever."?

Hello

Well that is how I feel like that gate. I guess I too will creak on forever even when I pass. Least if you an hear the creak then I guess you know you are still in some sort of working order.

I am getting there.

Lynn

Lynn please know we love you so much and we love this site.....

Matt would be very happy seeing you have kept this going

God bless you Lynn!!!!!