Stuck in life

[Belle]

The fear is the thing that comes across. Look at what you are fearing, look at your fear and embrace it, it's kept you safe, it's protected you - provided you with shelter and food to eat and employment. Realise that it is your friend - but because you are hostile to it, then it has become an enemy and is restricting you. So, start to become the friend and speak to it as a friend and say - "hey fear, there is this situation - what you recommend". Fear longs to be heard and embraced and it will keep you in check and allow you to flourish if you let it. But, if you oppose it, it will keep you in chains and hold you back - until you give it attention.

Things will drop away after that quite surprisingly.

Life is a constant surrender, we spend our lives surrendering to one thing and another, it's not easy.

[whitelotus]

Hey 4ever,

Thanks for this post.
Every single word you have written depicts my situation too.from last 3 years my life is same.I work at India 2nd best company of my field.and I habe always been working on challenging problems.but everything seems to have lost it's charm.


But on the othe side this time is making stronger everyda.
I am also trying my best to deal with it.the answers here make me feel to again try to do something about it.
I wish u get out of it soon and me too:-)

[Astral Jane]

yep describes my sitch too (except my work has been unstable, always changing). Glad you got so many responses. I think it's a big step, at least for me, to express the feeling of being stuck, disappointed with one's progress- to bring it to the fore; it's not that it was being denied, really, it just needs some tangible expression to be able to deal with it.

I kind of look at it as a typical phase (maybe repeating within cycles like the seasons) on any path of spiritual & personal growth. Many many people never overcome the feeling; it is the very nature of our civilization at this point to see to it that most people get stuck right there without access to the supports or the insight/drive needed to progress. Whatever helps you take the next steps like meditation, new health & nutrition practices, support and fellowship w/like-minded - it is this clear expression of it that has to happen first.

For me it's like asking "Why? What is it exactly that stands in the way?" and the Universe will tend to answer what I ask, and I glimpse these deep deep rooted beliefs and patterns of emotional responses, of discouragement, lack of support, frustration and lack of rewarding results for my attempts - those are the responses that I need to change, in small steps & small rewards on a daily basis.
Would like to hear if this changes for you in the near future, 4everlove & what you do that helps the most!

Every single one of these responses has helped tremendously! I am not even joking, I wasn't expecting to get all these responses. I really appreciate it. I am going to try to meditate tonight and see what comes up. I have also made a prayer I will do daily to help me let go...because I realize I am still very much attached ESPECIALLY to my job, but I know I am ready for something new. I am just ready for new altogether! These awkward stages in life are, well, awkward. How nice it will feel to just completely let go and accept the new! Thank you all! I am working on it! I will have to give an update. I hope you all are doing well. We can really learn from each other!

[moretocome]

Hello 4everLove,

It is clear that you are in the process of moving past your fear and gaining the ability to "let go" (i.e. Surrender). You've been given some great suggestions and info above (As if you needed it, here's more. Lol.).

I went through a period of profound transition by Surrendering CONTROL (and also through acquiring Detachment). My hope is that the following may provide a small bit of assistance to you. If it doesn't resonate with you, no worries. I have the strong feeling that you will be gaining the inner freedom you seek. Congratulations.


Regarding CONTROL-

I now realize that all desired CONTROL over one's circumstances is based in fear. This CONTROL provides a temporary feeling of safety and security. However, this CONTROL quickly goes from a feeling of safety and security to one of feeling trapped, confined, stuck, blocked, etc.

This is because the more you attempt to CONTROL everything in your life, the more CONTROL will be reflected back to you. Simply stated, the energy you emit will be the same energy that returns to you (i.e. the more CONTROL you exert results in you feeling more and more CONTROLLED, over time).

Thus, once I made the FIRM DECISION to SURRENDER all control over my life (i.e. work, money, life purpose, "success", etc.), the fear was no longer there. It was completely gone. In its place was Peace. True FREEDOM was gained.

[Note: To clarify, surrendering CONTROL does not imply that a person should cease to follow his or her preferences and/or heart's desires.]


Regarding SURRENDER-

To be more specific, the process of Surrender involves the surrendering of your EXPECTATION of how your life "should" be. This is the source of all struggles. The ego-self creates the EXPECTATION of how things "should" be in your life. Once you surrender the EXPECTATION, the struggle ceases to exist.

The answer lies in releasing your personal CONTROL and substituting it for Divine CONTROL. You do this by living in Present Moment and allowing Source (or Consciousness / God / etc. / whatever label you prefer) to guide you along Life’s Path. Simply put, as you seek greater personal CONTROL, you block the unfolding of your unique ‘pathway’ in this life. As you surrender personal CONTROL, this 'path’ reveals itself to you in wonderful and unexpected ways.


Regarding the importance of MEDITATION-

FEAR can be translated into False Evidence Appearing Real. In order for FEAR to exist, it must rely on OUTER circumstances to provide “evidence” of something fearful. The ego-self must look to OUTER circumstances in order to make a “reality” out of FEAR.

This is because the ego-self seeks to divert attention away from INNER TRUTH. The most effective method for doing this is for the ego-self to keep you from going WITHIN. By relying on INNER TRUTH rather than OUTER senses, the illusion of FEAR is transcended. An OUTER focus perpetuates FEAR; whereas an INNER focus dispels FEAR.


Regarding DETACHMENT-

Some mistake Detachment with a lack of caring. However, this couldn’t be further from the Truth.

With complete DETACHMENT comes complete freedom. With FREEDOM comes an ease in feeling Unconditional Love. And, with UNCONDITIONAL LOVE comes Joy, Peace, and a profound CONNECTION to everyone and everything.


Best wishes on your progress!

Love & Joy to you.

mtc

[Swami Chihuahuananda]

Oh, goodness....where to begin ...

After the difficult times, for sure . Even after becoming 'who I am' , finding my path, attenuating, actualizing, etc. etc . I still get the feeling of being stuck in this life sometimes. Like, "why can't I just float away into the Big Whatever whenever I want , or disappear in meditation ? ". Well, I sort of can, and definitely can, compared to how stuck I used to be in the old story of my former life in this body .

There's something about being here that seems to be tied in heavily to evolving into a process of being here and not being here. Some call it 'learning' , but that implies gaining words and knowldge, which are fine, but not the whole picture, of course. Something about coming to an acceptance of being here , and also being so much more, and the integration of all the aspects into a kind of balanced whole.

It can still be boring to work and brush teeth and clean house all the dang time, but there's also the transcendent that's always right there, right here . The trick, and I guess it's like a magic trick that you keep getting better and better at over the years, is remembering that the connection is there , and real . We are all 'stuck in life' , but we can also see that that's just part of our wholeness, and our wholeness is so much more ....