Should we throw out the twin flame idea?

Dear AubreyIris,
For some reasons the "Quote" thing didnt work well here and it looks like what you wrote is what I wrote and vice-versa, funny!
OK, so of course I agree sex can be addictive and lead to very bad behaviours and that's not at all what I meant with enlightened love-making (I prefer that word to sex, honestly, since your reaction proves it is a very charged word). Anyway I think we agree, to each one his own path. Thanks and hugs! (chaste of course!)

I actually find a lot of truth in this. I won't expand but it's given me things to think about. If we go back to intention again then we should consider the intent behind the act. I think with one person I love very much and feel very connected, safe, committed and wonderful with then it's very loving and good. But casual sex has never felt good to me and while I've experienced it I also will never involve myself in it again. My experience left me feeling empty, gutted and more alone than before it happened. I actually feel my one experience was with a soul mate to teach me the lesson that I'm to respect myself and the love act fully. Interesting comments. After my divorce I dated and none of them interested me really. It was... a chore. The only guy I met that I liked I met on accident (I'd tried online dating) and I swear this sounds crazy but he seemed extremely interested in me but like he couldn't... be with me. Single, smart, obviously attracted to me and liked me but he'd look at me with this expression of "I sooooo want to date you... but I can't." Amd I knew he was single and interested in dating. We never went past three dates although I really liked him and it always stuck out as off to me because he seemed into me (I can handle rejection just fine!) Later my guidance told me I wasn't supposed to date him; I was supposed to meet my twin. Had I dated this man we would have hit it off well and my twin came only months later. I felt that "pull" with him though that told me it would be a sweet relationship. The others, the dating, just felt empty.

I think when we indulge in sex with people we have little to no connection with it actually goes against our life plan. Maybe that's just me. I feel like if there is no connection beyond the physical then it's not of God. It's just ego. I've experienced both and never want ego-based again. I had a few moment after my divorce where I was unlike myself and while I came out unscathed it also very much not the "real" me. It was the wounded seeking reassurance wanting love from anywhere old me that is gone now, thank God. After meeting my twin I feel an aversion to meeting anyone new. I'd have to say my drive is lower and I am okay with that. I'm fine being alone (I still can't say "single" because it hurts too much now that TS is gone) until... well until the time is perfectly right again. Perfectly purely lovingly openly and trustingly right. The thought of sex just for the sake of sex or with the wrong person makes me want to vomit then cry now. Or cry then vomit. I guess it's just a twin thing.

Sometimes I read words on this forum that make things with my twin slam back into me. An awareness will flash over me. These messages make me realize that even with my twin I felt that I had to be "pretty" and "alluring" and "sexual" in order to be loved fully. My ex-husband did not want me and it really affected me I'm figuring out now. My twin was highly attracted to me, mystically so, but even so, even with all his obviously unconditional love for me I still felt inside like I to be alluring which was so silly because he adored me like I did him which was a total cherishing feeling not simple attraction. I felt still like the real me, the "just" me in all my glory and sweetness and love and just a lot of sweetness wasn't enough. I'm actually crying right now. Funny how Spirit hits us with insight at the oddest moments. Truth can hurt but it will set you free. It also shows me even more why we had to part because I am fine just plain ole' me and I had to learn this. Lessons to learn.

It is so surreal. I've shared on here that my guidance tells me our fears are spoken to us by our twins via soul. I totally over share I know (I'm what's known as a "high discloser" in the world of communication) but my twin in the two months we were together was very sensitive about flirting or borderline "naughty" talk with me. He was always sweet and so so caring, never wanting to offend. Always telling me how much he loved me and respected me. Then he left and "shut off" to me. One of the first things he said, like two weeks after telling me he wanted me to come look at houses with him, was that he thought it was "only attraction." He was very adamant and it tortured me at first. He would write me short curt messages telling me blunt sexual things and say, "See? When I think of you I only think of how attracted I am to you." It was night and day, totally opposite, alien taken over his heart kinda stuff. I swear I'm learning that Spirit will honestly channel our fears through our twins right smack dab in our faces until we finally see clearly and change the false perceptions we have about ourselves.

Originally Posted by aubreyiris

I guess that there are many paths to the same mountain top and both chastity or sacred sex are valid depending on the persons. You shouldn't be dogmatic. And your examples are a bit one sided: you could find many prophets or saintly figures who had a healthy sex life. Even until an advanced age if you believe the Old Testament!

What I am saying is my truth. You are free to have your truth too. I'm not a fence sitter, though I used to be. I know what I believe in and I'm not afraid to say it. I don't personally believe in the old testament although there is some good stuff in that. Jesus basically said that he was coming with a higher law than the old testament when he gave his teachings. I do believe that there are people who are married and sexually active who become enlightened, but I believe that the desire and addiction to sex has been given up in their hearts and minds. You can have something and not care about it and not have an attachment to it. It seems like nowadays people think sex is very important and people's sexual desires have become so inflamed that many people will to anything with just about anyone to satisfy their insatiable desire. This desire controls them. They are slaves to it. They are not free. In my opinion that is what enlightenment is freedom. Freedom from any desires. Think about it, since the "sexual revolution" occurred, people are doing all kinds of things that used to be very uncommon. People even kill their own babies, but continue having promiscuous sex for their own selfish satisfaction. 1 in 3 children in the USA are sexually abused before they reach adulthood. There is nothing sacred about this. I do believe that sexuality with self-control and commitment is fine but now people just will do anything for it and practically live for it. This is out of control and its the opposite of sacred.[/quote]

[MorpHnStorM]

Originally Posted by aubreyiris

In my opinion that is what enlightenment is freedom. Freedom from any desires. Think about it, since the "sexual revolution" occurred, people are doing all kinds of things that used to be very uncommon. People even kill their own babies, but continue having promiscuous sex for their own selfish satisfaction. 1 in 3 children in the USA are sexually abused before they reach adulthood. There is nothing sacred about this. I do believe that sexuality with self-control and commitment is fine but now people just will do anything for it and practically live for it. This is out of control and its the opposite of sacred.

I actually agree with this (and I understand where your coming from...), but you seem to be confusing just a base physical desire/act (sex) and sacred union/love making, which has little to do with that...

SN: I can understand this confusion when I see it written as "sacred sex", as I don't particularly like it myself.

Another SN: Likewise, I don't like it how the word "lover" is popularly associated with is a sex partner/casual affair, or that love making and sex/"effing" mean the same things to many...

Originally Posted by forestfire

Well the word Tantric is a bit too overused nowadays so not so sure what it really means in fact but yes, you're right regarding the energy part. Even without a single physical contact this energy can flow and be very powerful. Even just a simple phone conversation, if you are "tuned-in" (don't know how to explain this) to the soul of the other though his/her voice, it can be magical...

This is the kind of stuff I'm talking about!

[alamode]

Originally Posted by MorpHnStorM

confusing just a base physical desire/act (sex) and sacred union/love making, which has little to do with that..

I agree. I also see the confusuion in thinking that giving up sex is a path of enlightenment. There is a big difference between the intentions behind the act which you've defined here. Sex as sacred union/love making is an excellent path to enlightenment. People under LBL hypnotic regression even describe having a form of sex/love making/soul merging in the spiritual world and the whole intent is merging/bonding, so if its natural, good and enlightened there in the spiritual world, then as long as the same intents are done here as humans, this its the same type of thing but just expressed in a different way since we have human bodies. The Creator has designed and defined for us how this is soul merging happens here on Earth in human bodies since we can't merge in the same way as done in spirit form without physical bodies. The monks and others who refuse to do spiritual union/soul merging sex here on Earth just don't realize the big difference behind the intentions of base physical desire sex vs. Spiritual union/love making sex.