How to handle two soulmates.....

[white-dove]

Originally Posted by happyhaunts03

I'm assuming these are soulmates you're having romantic feelings for. If so, I have some experience with that. At one point in my life, I came across two soulmates (technically I refer to one of them as my twin flame, but I didn't know/understand the difference at the time) who I had romantic feelings for at the same time. They both provided different lessons and experiences to help me grow. It was a rough time when one soulmate saw the connection I had with another and I lost them both in the end. So, in my case, we couldn't all live harmoniously. But, maybe you can. There are people who are accepting of polyamory, but it would be a tough sell unless everyone's on board. In my experience, if I could go back, I would pick just 1 as much as losing the other would hurt. I think things would have ended in a better way for all of us if I had. Soulmates are such a challenge as it is and having more than one in your life in a romantic way is very difficult at best. Good luck with whatever decisions you come to.

HappyHaunts, could you explain the difference between soulmate and twin flame in terms of your experience? I'm interested for personal reasons - I'd like to understand my own experiences...

[white-dove]

Originally Posted by emeraldheart

The art of Non - attachment to hear the heed the inner guidance...


This has been my experience many times as I learnt to expand my entire concept of love!

This is why I love this TF path so much and what it has shown me

I have a beautiful inter-dependant marriage with my husband, we have been together as friends since we were 14 and together as a couple for 13 years... so all up we've known and grown with each other for 17 years now.
During that time we have both had many soulmates - all who came In to teach us more about love. I naturally fall in love quite easily... I am polyromantic or something but we are designed to learn and evolve as a species through our interconnectedness with other's.

I still feel a deep sense of connection with one of my soulmates - the one who acted as my divine mirror.
My husband and I talk about all the connections we have experienced and on a soul level we know just how important their roles were in each other's lives.

The art of non - attachment is a wonderful trait to develop as it allows space to LOVE all connections and honour individuals as well.

My mirror soulmate taught me so much about love, 'need' and non - attachment!
And he showed me how to love all connections in such a manner ... non attachment... love for the sake of loving!

With love I allow non - attachment and patience to lead the way.
Both elements work together to allow me to connect to and be guided by my inner truth!

My husband and I could have seperated many, many times due to the confusion of all the soul connections we experienced but with non - attachment, acceptance of the deeper workings of each other's experiences and of course patience the best way was always revealed through the inner voice.

Loving free from attachment and expectation is a learnt art... but it is wonderful as it makes each moment with any connection special because there is an awareness that there is nothing to be claimed by you... only the now moment to enjoy.

We never know how long any connection will last - but it will be the right amount of time for each soul.

I still fall in love quite alot as that is my soul expressing itself... but I am no longer concerned about it because I practice loving without attachment...

I'm honest with myself and my husband when it happens as he is with me - and our acceptance of each other reguardless makes me love him even more... we have built a very strong foundation as a result of this honesty.

It makes all relationships richer... as we learn how to love in this way.

Deep down the core of you... knows what is the best and highest outcome for all.

That is what I let guide me... it is the silent inner knowing... but oftsn that inner knowing can take some time to unfold... to he made known.

Many years ago I was deeply I love with two soul mates... and I had to choose one... I was at that time heavily attached...

One was my husband and one was my mirror soulmate... a very strong soul connection.
Many years later I was doing the inner work to reconcile my love for both... a few more soulmate connections came along in between but the love for my husband and mirror soul has been by far the strongest.

In the end I had to learn non attachment... I broke up with my husband many, many times for many months and practiced the art of non attachment in love during those breaks.

Eventually... NOW... I realise just how smart my inner knowing is and I trust it 100%
I do not regret a thing because I chose the right thing for everyone involved... the highest and most loving choice -
And now I can sit back and laugh at how it all unfolded... and love all members of my soul family... with a whole heart... as we are all one in spirit... and I simply go on... honouring the moment NOW and honouring everyone involved.

Loving for the simple sake of loving.... not because I have to or need to but because I want to.

Haha!

Ask your deepest knowing and highest knowing to guide you.

My mantra is 'the highest and best possible outcome for all'... and then I accept the outcome...
Myself and everyone else... only desiring the best for all...
That is how the soul loves and

That is how I honour everyone involved

EmeraldHeart, can I ask you what happened with your mirror soulmate and if you are still in touch with one another? From what you say it sounds like a growing - and possibly painful - experience.

I'd like to understand more about what the 'divine mirror' is.... it sounds like it could fit what I have experienced this year. With a sad ending in a way as we are no longer in contact by - let's say - traditional means. Only through our telepathic exchanges. I think they will now gradually become less now we are not in touch (I hope so as I am going mad with with getting his feelings constantly, and they are very very intense!!!!).

I hope they will never go away completely but remain at a level where we can both send each other feelings and love and 'distress calls' when we need some of that love vibe - that's what we do - I hope it will be like this. That's why I'm so interested what happened in your case! if you would like to share more :-)

[white-dove]

Originally Posted by Tortoise Walks

Is it more important to be able to express your truth and your love with your love(s) or is it more important to keep your “selected love” comfortably secure in their relationship view of you prioritizing only him/her in your life. Maybe the structure of your union(s) could be open to whatever is most harmonious (which for me requires the freedom to honestly express when I love (even polyromantic) wherher it physically materializes or not. Period. Doesnt have to mean everyone lives together...or everyone sleeps toether or everyone has kids... but maybe it does...

My husband and I resonate with open polyamory at this point in our relationship. It was a tough ride for a while to break down our expectations, insecurities, and self protections... we had a lot of foundational stuff to work through. Illuminating whatever shadows and halos show up, consciously ;-)

My journey in healing my wounded and shattered relationship paradigms did prepare me at a surface level (LOL) to bravely welcome the intense soul love i felt/feel for SC. I would not have been open to energetically recognizing the love i felt outside of my marriage beforehand.

And now... i would be devastated to discover that my partner or love(s) loved someone other than me but put his/her head in the sand and numbed/avoided their feelings just for my comfort. I no longer value that kind of self sacrifice from a partner. People get hurt by the truth sometimes... (been there) and sometimes the world magically opens up in magical ways...

Yes - beautiful. Could not agree more. This is true maturity isn't it - to have the strength to give up on those fixed ideas and clinging to things.. especially romantic relationships.. through our own insecurity and neediness and not because of what they are. I need to learn this myself.

Life is both beautiful (very) and painful (very).

[Ariaecheflame]

Originally Posted by white-dove

EmeraldHeart, can I ask you what happened with your mirror soulmate and if you are still in touch with one another? From what you say it sounds like a growing - and possibly painful - experience.

I'd like to understand more about what the 'divine mirror' is.... it sounds like it could fit what I have experienced this year. With a sad ending in a way as we are no longer in contact by - let's say - traditional means. Only through our telepathic exchanges. I think they will now gradually become less now we are not in touch (I hope so as I am going mad with with getting his feelings constantly, and they are very very intense!!!!).

I hope they will never go away completely but remain at a level where we can both send each other feelings and love and 'distress calls' when we need some of that love vibe - that's what we do - I hope it will be like this. That's why I'm so interested what happened in your case! if you would like to share more :-)

Happy to answer at some point lol... quite busy at the today so will pop by later.

[Melahin]

Originally Posted by starnight1

I m afraid to hurt anyone, I don't want to hurt anyone, so I escape....just run.

From my exp. that is the thing that hurts everyone involved... so maybe practice resonating from your heart

[Ariaecheflame]

Hi white - dove

Mirror soulmate, myself and hubby used to cruise in the same circles... I am only acquaintances with mirror sm now, occassionaly a friendly chat - but that is purely just due to the fact that it's been so many years and life just keeps moving and everything keeps changing! I and my husband are both very aware that there is an energy between us (whatever that is couldn't say exactly, but he has helped me to grow and evolve exponentially in this life on a soul level) We were all friends for some time during my connection with both and the energy was amicable... and aware lol.

I am still friends with other soul connections and there is a sense of familiarity with them - like that feeling of being right at home... I believe in soul families - and that is the feeling.

Sometimes romantic notions would and do stir but... the more I learnt about non - attachment the more I learnt how to just be and relate to another from pure brom beingness... yet another thing which my divine mirror showed me... to simply be...I always feel a great sense of admiration for these soul connections but am no longer intimidated or concerned as I fully trust myself to honour everyone involved
That self trust is also reflected in my partnership...

Yes hubby knows about all haha... we had a chat today and he just said he trusts me, we trust each other. I am I guess what you would say panromantic, fluid l, we are both queer or queer curious in his case - so much of our entire dynamic demands honesty.
Trust isn't like... we don't believe we can't ever be hurt... trust is more about trusting the best outcome on a soul growth level... for all in any given moment... regardless of what is going on on a physical level. It means that we simply love from the core in the now moment as that is all there is.

We were just talking together about the nature of love and how fluid it can be... how we all learn so much from all sorts of connections and how each connection can teach something that no other connection could...
It is really quite a beautiful thing to have such a relationship with my husband - one which understands and is not intimidated by these things.

The reason why I use the term Mirror is because for the sake of NOT using a possesive term and it sort of helps to explain the whole experience.
While anyone can act as a mirror to us... in this particular connection the mirror effect was more magnifying... and multi layered.
It stunned me to my core initially and through this mirror effect I was able to truely know my inner core for the first time and work through each level of programming which was a veil over this authentic nature!
Truely the reflection urged me to work through every layer in order to get back to and embody my inner being... my inner truth!

Pretty nasty work and very painful at times but by far the most empowering process for the soul!
Quite wonderful with the power of hindsight... just how much freerer I feel just being myself- the inner sense of being at home with myself and in the world as one!

The work is worth it - especially as your limitations for specific outcomes are dropped-
At some point I could feel the residual limitations drop - and that is when I just started feeling in harmony and unity with the universe... and loving in a vastly different way...
Where I can feel safe and free to express myself and not be afraid... ashamed or limited by programming.
And to have someone by my side who gets that -
Is super cool - amazing- I am so grateful - because at this time... it can feel quite rare to find others who remember how freely the soul can feel and experience love - with no agenda...

Love is a language which we can all experience from unique perspectives... and we can speak to each other with that language through the heart... to me it makes sense that each person who we connect with has something unique to communicate with us... to show us...

Honesty can be a seriously under - rated ingredient in all kinds of connections... with honesty we leave ourselves vulnerable... yet we can also open ourselves up so something deeper - if the receiver is also unafraid to he vulnerable with us... that is a dynamic I discovered in my closest relationships.

[happyhaunts03]

Originally Posted by white-dove

HappyHaunts, could you explain the difference between soulmate and twin flame in terms of your experience? I'm interested for personal reasons - I'd like to understand my own experiences...

I can try. It's very subtle and I didn't realize the difference until years later. The resounding difference for me is that after 10+ years, I still feel connected to my TF. We still have an energy connection despite not seeing each other or speaking with each other in years. With my soulmate that I had at the same time, there was still an all-encompassing feeling that he was a part of my life, meant to be there and help guide me on my journey, but once his part was done in teaching me to look at the person I was and trust my perception of self, once I had learned my lesson from him, I no longer had that same intensity of feeling. I cared for him and loved him on some level, but knew that a relationship was not the path we were to follow together. It was easier to see him go because our business in this lifetime was finished. I'll always hold him in high regard and cherish what we had, but nothing more.

My TF, who I literally met on the same day as my soulmate, had an instant connection to me similarly to the other, but on a much deeper level. Within days of knowing me, he could read me better than anyone I had ever met. He knew what I had been doing the night before or my plans for the evening. He could tell when I was upset and exactly how to calm me. I would think about what he should wear that day and drive by the office only to see him wearing exactly what I pictured. And he was the embodiment of everything I wanted and everything I feared. I saw him as flawed, but in a way that was still ideal. But I also saw him as someone who was far too good for me, who flirted with too many people, who didn't necessarily have a promising future. And a lot of it came from not loving myself (which is where the soulmate came in to remind me of the good in me and the reasons why I was worthy of love). I wanted what I had with him so badly, but because I was terrified, I ran so many times that I eventually couldn't go back.

So, I guess the soulmate was the "easier" relationship. It came without question, without doubt. But, it wasn't the one that was going to get under my skin permanently. When my soulmate relationship ended, it was gut wrenching for a while, but ultimately, didn't leave any lasting damage or feeling. And I truly didn't know how much my TF had gotten under my skin until years later when I thought back on him and realized I could still feel his energy signature as if he was in the room with me. I thought back one day and tried to compare it to the soulmate, but the same link just isn't there.

So, after all that typing, I think I can sum it up in a couple of sentences. My soulmate was a gentle breeze, pushing my internal perceptions in the right direction. My TF, on the other hand, was like a hurricane, changing everything and nothing at the same time.

I hope that was helpful in some way. It's very hard for me to put in words the experience and the difference because it was just something I eventually came to know instinctively, but if you had asked me in the thick of it, I wouldn't have been able to tell you how the two were different.

[starnight1]

Melahin, yes, it hurts everyone including myself , too......

emeraldheart, u r a blessed soul, there is angels helping u along the path to work out the soul family, actually....
for me, i feel it is there is a dark force is blocking actually.....

i seriously can't make a decision to choose any one of them, i dont know if it is my rising sign Gemini, i often met two soulmates , when i was younger i also involved two men same time.....and they r totally different , and the dynamic with them both r all good.....i m repeating such pattern, i m dynamic in different way with different soulmates and i like them equally.....
my connection with them usually very dramatic and stormy, and i need both energy to support.
maybe i m not evolved or strong enough like u , u can finally make a decision to choose your husband?

for me, i finally decide to leave all of them, just connect them telepathically,
and often when i escape them, i go on a lonely journey , this loneliness
often stiminulates my heart to a new level, then i make an art or music during the time, my best art is made when i m very lonely and broken.

so u see, maybe universe is using such kind of patterns /soulmates to let me make creative arts?
maybe this is also why so many artists r finally alone?

[Ariaecheflame]

I just went with the unfolding flow... in this case fate flowed how it was meant to
Alot of it was faith and inner knowing which guided me - the soul always knows best.

I don't believe one has to be alone or lonely to do art... but the emotions of pain and lonlieness can be of course can be expressed through art.
Sometimes I've noticed there can be a belief with some artists that only pain can create good art - and so they can sometimes attract various experiences to reflect those
beliefs...
Pain and lonlieness are just some of the great multitude of human experiences... it can be cathardic to creatively epress oneself ...though it doesn't mean that only pain makes you a good artist.
I'm a writer and have recently started putting my own voice to my songs... I've written when deeply depressed, when I am in a bliss state and every state in between - life is a mixture of many emotions and my writing like alot of art forms reflect the many and varied experiences of what it is like to be human.

Perhaps... there is a deeper belief occurring underneath the surface for you... one where without suffering your art will not be good enough... and therefore you are not good enough as an artist or a person?

It can be scary if we are creatively inclined to know and have faith in ourselves and our value simply for being... being who we are at the most basic of levels where everything is stripped back and all that is left is our very core... we might be frightened that if everything was stripped back... that inner self isn't enough.


If you connect to that core than you can create something from it as well... something which is yours... with such authenticity... to express your true truth... which is free from the filters of beliefs placed upon self through fear.
We are all creators... some more aware of this creative power than others and although sometimes we might choose not to create for a while... it will always be accessible to us... and there is always a choice to what belief we to align with and create from.

To connect with this one needs to come to a place of acceptance of one's whole self (both the shadows and the light and everything in between) and self love.of course... to deeply know one's own value at the very core of being...
Your creativity won't go away... it will most probably just take a slightly different tone or form...
Creativity tends to evolve naturally as we grow anyway - reguardless, whatever you create or not will be just as valid as before for you are valuable.

[starnight1]

I will meditate to find if there is a deeper belief or thing makes my art coming more often from pain and grief.
Perhaps more other reasons.....i don't know yet, i need to find it.
I tend to do extreme things, like extreme music and activities.

I just did a small chat with a soulmate few minutes ago, it scared me----the INTENSity of the emotion.
I m intense deep down, but i hide it, and i m afraid of the fire to come out.

When u say about the non-attachment, now i feel it seems impossible......
we r emotional beings, human has strong emotion, how is it possible to be non-attachment.
that is why i run away too.....
the Emotion/ love itself is the attachment.

Also, if i manage to calm down and learn a friend way to be with them, a bit aloof......no romantic......but he is still with INTENSE emotion, he is in attachment.
I m sure when u try to cut the connection with your soulmates/soul family, tell them u r back to your husband, they must feel very sad, they won't let u go.....cos they r made of emotions, too..... emotion is the FIRE of the heart. the true authentic love.

We may say Emotion is from ego, we need to get no attachment from it,
there is something deeper than emotion rising from the heart, that spark is the soulful Love/connection, that is very Intense.
Actually when i meet such spark, it makes me want to die for it......which is why its scary, too.