Difficulty with Listening to my thoughts

[ellespirit]

I don't get into the zone, on every meditation but I accept that I must practice, stick to my ritual and for the days that the children don't walk in and interrupt, or that I don't hear the tv blaring from the living room, when I do hit the zone, it's very special. I appreciate others have achieved the skill of being able to block it all out. I am still working towards this and I belive am just at the crawling stage of my awakening. I appreciate now that my patience and discipline will pay off in the long run, because it's about quitening the mind for now.

[Miss Hepburn]

Gee, the very absolute last thing I do in meditation is listen to the Mind.
If a nutty thought comes in I gently put the needle back on the groove of concentrating on what I was taught to concentrate on.

The breath is excellent.

I watched a PBS Show last night and the doc had a name for some thoughts "ANT" -
"Automatic Negative Thoughts" explaining how we are not our thoughts...bla bla.
He got that right.

When someone suddenly says, "Shhh, listen."
All thoughts stop and you are stunned a bit to listen----just listen.
There are no thoughts. This is a neat example of pure attentiveness.

Listening to the Sound Current is another good thing to focus on.
You could probably google that one.

If the Mind has nothing to focus on - it can go nuts! It is the Mind that takes us away from expereincing so much.

But, there are many different thoughts on this. This is just mine.

I love the saying from the Old Testament, He who stays his mind on me I will give him perfect peace.
It was on a refridgerator of a house I was looking at -maybe the first Bible verse I memorized. It really "got" me.

Sounds like peace is what you are after. Best wishes.

Xan method is so simple and effective. I've learned it's not supposed to be complicated. Making it complicated makes it worse and frustrating. It doesn't work for me every single time, depending on what's going on in my life, that day. I am working on it and still learning, but finally finding Xan's advice was an "ah-ha" moment.

Thanks everyone. I'll come back to these posts and reread them. Every time I asked this in the past I was misunderstood so this was good.

Originally Posted by Xan

This is so, Gem.

For the benefit of others who may not know, it's also not trying not to react because that's just a struggle against feelings... inner conflict rather than accepting it all, which frees us from conflict.

Instead of avoiding reactivity we find the quiet space in ourselves where reactions just don't happen.


Xan

Couldn't of said it better.

Hi again. Since I made this topic I have gone through a lot. At the time I was being intensely threatened by my negative past and any attempt to listen to my mind brought on dread and fear and tunnel vision. I thought I would die or have to commit suicide, it was terrible. But somehow I decided to die to the past and when I did that everything was ok. I overcame physical pain and illness, most of my major unhappy past experiences and became much happier and calmer. I'm still undergoing that process but the practice has changed significantly. The changes came when I first discovered this article on inner death:

bit [dot] ly / z8oRTO

(you'll have to change the url)

I recommend that anyone read this if you have the same problem I had.

I have also been meditating on my emotions and the development here has been as significant as the process I just described if not more. I'm getting to the point where I can listen to thoughts and not react to my mind now.

Originally Posted by ellespirit

I don't get into the zone, on every meditation but I accept that I must practice, stick to my ritual and for the days that the children don't walk in and interrupt, or that I don't hear the tv blaring from the living room, when I do hit the zone, it's very special. I appreciate others have achieved the skill of being able to block it all out. I am still working towards this and I belive am just at the crawling stage of my awakening. I appreciate now that my patience and discipline will pay off in the long run, because it's about quitening the mind for now.

You need to find a meditation series called Insight Meditation by Joseph Goldstein. It's incredible and has sections on emotions, breath and the hinderances. I'm lucky enough not to have any hinderances except road noise which has never bothered me that much.

Today I learned that this is called Vipassana. It's funny that I read about it after I already knew it.

Originally Posted by Xan

Yes, you get into the endless loop of the mind when your aim is to experience the Now beyond the mind. How frustrating!

But you don't need to do all that complexity in your mind... in fact being present is very simple.

Try this:

* Take a step back from what you've been doing in your mind by focusing your attention in your breathing... down in your belly.

* Keep breathing and notice how your thinking begins to slow down.

* Then, whatever feelings and thoughts come and go just accept and allow and let go of each one, as you consciously breathe.

As you do this you are being present.

At some point you spontaneously will notice that you are aware, but it comes without trying.


I saw a Tolle video the other day where he begins with this teaching --- with conscious breathing you bring yourself into the present --- and it's in his books too.

Xan

I think I'll focus more on the breath meditation now, thank you. :)

As hard as it sounds, release attachment to the outcome as worry can take space away from what you're trying to accomplish. It sounds like you've been dealing with confusion for a while. Stillness without looking for your inner thoughts might be the best thing. That wasn't said out of judgement. I may be wrong. I've dealt with a tremendous amount of confusion myself and sometimes the reaction to can take up more thought than the root of.

[Gem]

Well done. You did good!

Originally Posted by Gem

Well done. You did good!

Thanks

Originally Posted by perfect earth

As hard as it sounds, release attachment to the outcome as worry can take space away from what you're trying to accomplish. It sounds like you've been dealing with confusion for a while. Stillness without looking for your inner thoughts might be the best thing. That wasn't said out of judgement. I may be wrong. I've dealt with a tremendous amount of confusion myself and sometimes the reaction to can take up more thought than the root of.

I think that's something I've been wondering about for a while, how do I do this if I just can't listen to my thoughts right. It still doesn't make sense.

I've been dong a lot more breath and emotions meditations in the last week and it has helped. What I've noticed is how much I daydream but don't know how to deal with it. Currently I just try and focus back on my breathing. This seems to quiet my thoughts, but I can't very well watch my breath forever.

Most of my difficulty, and interest in spirituality stems from my Asperger syndrome. It causes enormous distress and without it I wouldn't be here, but it is an opportunity others don't get. Thought you should all know why I struggle with this so much.

Thanks for your support.

My friend you are the one creating all the thoughts but then again how is it difficult. A simple example would be to start talking to yourself loudly when you are alone, do you hear what you are speaking and can you control and regulate what you choose to speak. The sound waves are vibrations and similarly the thought waves are vibrations. We have ears to hear the sound waves but to listen to the thought waves we do have inner ears of our consciousness. We are spiritual beings, so all it takes is some attention. but before that we need to slow down our thinking and practice choosing our thoughts. God Bless YOU!!!!!!