My story: I decided to stay celibate

[Anima]

Originally Posted by 17 years of separation

Anima,
Thank you for your reply. As I am truly suffering for 17 years, I am blessed that only recently I have found some answers as to be able to connect with soulful people like yourself. I am confused about one thing you wrote:
What benefit if any would I be getting from entering into relationships with others? Yes please send me info about tf and sms as I would like to label my connection correctly
love topli pozdravi

In the past?

Like I said, maybe those relationships you had, the pain you went through, prepared you for being able to handle the intensity and hardships of a soul connection relationship. Try not to think about the previous relationships as "wrong". Even though maybe they weren't something that was meant to be, they taught you lessons, they pushed you towards your awakening, and I hope towards your soulmate too. Maybe if you and your guy haven't been seperated, you'd not be pushed to your limits enough to be able to trully appreciate eachother and stay together once you meet again. Even in some cases where people aren't seperated by outside circumstances, they find the intensity of the connection scary, and both or one of them run from it emotionally or/and physically - we call them "runners".

Right now?

Judging by what you wrote about your spiritual awakening, not much. By saying

I wish I could tell you to open yourself up to possible other relationship, but even though I'm young and relatively unexperienced, I completely understand the problems with connecting to the other people the same way, and the wish to rather wait than push yourself into relationships you know in your soul can never match up

I meant, "It would be nice if I could tell you that you could find someone else and be content in case you two don't work out after all, but since I am going through the similar thing, I don't find something like that likely, and I am sorry for and relate to the anguish you are going through". Make more sense now?

I feel very vulnerable, finding someone I know is the love of my life, at the age of 17, before I trully know who I am, and so many complications between us (physical distance, huge age difference, his dangerous career) that make us unlikely to work out... And at the same time feeling married to him in my soul. I start to wonder... If higher force doesn't intend for us to be together in this life, am I supposed to push myself into relationships with other men, hoping I can live with feeling like I am cheating on myself, him and the man I am with... Or did the destiny or God or whatever you want to call it, cruely condemn me to celibacy, all by giving me the best thing in my life I would never wish didn't happen to me?

I guess the bottom line is... Only you know in your soul what is right for you. And while I completely understand your decision of celibacy until/if he comes your way, I also think, or at least I am trying to believe, that I shouldn't intentionally or unintentionally isolate myself in the process. In case I'm supposed to learn a higher lesson from it, I shouldn't be too stuck up on the romance part, and hoping that just because we're so complicated, unlikely and a soul connection, we're going to work out against all odds. You know?

I'll private message you with links of articles on soulmates and twinflames as soon as I catch time. Also, my advice is, try not to get too caught up on labels. As much as it helps to tell eachother our stories, and how comforting it is to have a thing to hang onto, something that bonds all of us in this forum, it can also limit us and make us miss the point, if we aren't careful with how we "position" ourselves towards it. I try to believe only those things that resonate in the depths of my being.


Topli pozdravi i tebi, i sretno,

Anima

Dear Anima,
If I was twenty right now I would not had made this step. After the string of relationships (that I don't see as a mistakes at all I only said that those were abusive relationships I see them as I carmic lessons I needed to learn) I know,
that my decision is the right one for me. I am rejoycing my decesion it feels beautiful inside. Also becoming the mother changed me on spiritual level as I am caring for the crystal child which brings the happiness on its own, thus sex is not going to be the source of happiness for me. Thank you for clarifying what you wrote, I also feel your pain. Being so young, the same age I were when I got separated, when the life, and lust is brewing all around you, the juices are flowing and the one you need to be with is not around. I was "practical" enough to know if I keep waiting for Him I will miss out on motherhood, so I ensured that doesn't happen to me. That would be my advice to young girls, motherhood is such an uplifting experience, if it can not happen with tf, it should happen. I am not into labels. I am into spiritual cleansing. I sense you are very patronizing when you write, and sense you could be judgmental at times. Not sure if that is an age difference and language barrier, or it is coming from your desire to educate others spiritually which is a great thing, but I need to tell you what I am sensing. No matter how right or wrong we are we are in this together, and we need to supress Ego in order to form bonds. Please do not take this wrong way. If you sense anything about me, please tell me. Veliki topli pozdravi tebi i sucanom Splitu

[Anima]

Originally Posted by 17 years of separation

Dear Anima,
If I was twenty I would not make this step. After the string of relationships (that I don't see as a mistakes rather then carmic lessons) I know,
that my decision is the right one for me. I am rejoycing my decesion it feels beautiful inside. Also becoming the mother changed me on spiritual level as I am caring for the cristal child which brings the happiness on its own, thus sex is not going to be the source of happiness for me. Thank you for clarifying what you wrote, I also feel your pain. Being so young, the same age I were when I got separated, when the life, and lust is brewing all around you, the juices are flowing and the one you need to be with is not around. I was "practical" enough to know if I keep waiting for Him I will miss out on motherhood, so I ensured that doesn't happen to me. That would be my advice to young girls, motherhood is such an uplifting experience, if it can not happen with tf, it should happen. I am not into labels. I am into spiritual cleansing. I sense you are very patronizing when you write, and sense you could be judgmental at times. Not sure if that is an age difference and language barrier, or it is coming from your desire to educate others spiritually which is a great thing, but I need to tell you what I am sensing. No matter how right or wrong we are we are in this together, and we need to supress Ego in order to form bonds. Please do not take this wrong way. If you sense anything about me, please tell me. Veliki topli pozdravi tebi i sucanom Splitu

I understand... well, as much as I can at my age. Actually a big thing lately for me is that my TF is not sure if he wants more children. I would sacrifice a lot for him, but motherhood is not one of those things, cause I've always been good with kids and felt a strong wish to be a mother. He says that he himself might as well eventually call us off because of my own good, and the good of my future children. We're trying not to overthink it, and just let go and accept, and once we're completely balanced, if destiny still doesn't want us to be together, just accept some more, I guess.

My purpose really was to help/educate, since it seems many confused people come to this forum that need encouragement and some insight. I used to be one of them, and reading the things LadyImpreza1111 said to me at the time was the first step towards the acceptance I made. I am not always sure how far off the persons I am responding to are, like in your case, so I just share info hoping some of it helps. I don't deem myself a specialist in any way, just an observer to my own and other's soul connections. Sometimes the person I am responding to actually helps me come to some realisations instead. It's a great back and forth process. However, yes, I am a strong teacher/concelour kind of person, I get long winded in my responses, and I can be a bit of a smart head. And yes, while I let go a lot in the past year, I am still trying to deal with my ego. Sorry if I made you feel like I was condensending. My purpose was not to downplay your or anyone's perspective, but to show my take on it. Which is why I said that only you know in your soul what is right for you.

Anima

Anima ljubavi,
I only feel love for you and all of my past lovers which some of them have hit me pushed me and called me names. I hope you don't mind me advising on the motherhood, but you know what there are many many females who are just as content and spiritual and they didn't need motherhood to get them there Yes it looks like LadyI is very advanced. I think there is no mistake, no coincedence that someone from Cro has responded to this thread. In terms of your Sf and his suggestions to "call things off" as I learned you did too, it is not uncommon for people to fight things off, at the end this is such a powerful feeling it is hard to deal with that. I myself tried to escape it by getting married at the age of 19, how rediculous is that..:)) Look at his wishes from the position of love. If he is not ready no need to push, that is alright as love understands and love waits. On another note my aura is light blue how about you, I can hardly wait for your messages in my private box. Your English is perfect. How did you learn it. I have so much to ask you...Talk later. Love and blessings

[psychoslice]

Don't call it celibacy call it celebration, for when you realize that your true happiness is within you and never to be found out side of you, then its time to celebrate. There are so many trying to find happiness in another, they are addicted to their own species, the other draws you to them because like most animals you want to reproduce your own species, this is the magnetism of all animals but unfortunately most think this pull is true love. To know what true love is is to go beyond the instincts of or evolutionary programing, its going deep within, into the silence that has always been there, always in the back ground of our life's journey. This inner Knowing of Love is very rarely discovered, for those who discover it find that they don't need anyone to make them whole, they are already whole, to have a relationship with one who doesn't know of their inner true being, will only drag you down to their neurotic behavioral level that they call love. So Congratulations on finding the true Love that is YOU.

Psychoslice, thank you. Thank you as I am rejoycing my decesion. I had to learn so much to get to this place. To come to think of it, even when I reunite (if that happens, which is God's wish that I will respect anyways),
I do not think that the sex will be necessary. At all. I just have one question to ask you when you said "relationship with one who doesn't know of their inner tru being" did you think of my twinflame or you spoke in general terms? This is my first day on this thread I am already feeling blessed..

[psychoslice]

Originally Posted by 17 years of separation

Psychoslice, thank you. Thank you as I am rejoycing my decesion. I had to learn so much to get to this place. To come to think of it, even when I reunite (if that happens, which is God's wish that I will respect anyways),
I do not think that the sex will be necessary. At all. I just have one question to ask you when you said "relationship with one who doesn't know of their inner tru being" did you think of my twinflame or you spoke in general terms? This is my first day on this thread I am already feeling blessed..

Hi, I'm so glad that you are happy in your decision, not let those who are addicted to their relationships drag you down to their level, you have risen above all that, so it seems. Yes when I said about having a relationship with those who don't know of their true SELF, yes I meant your past flame or anyone who fits this description. Believe me I have been through many relationships and I had to learn this the hard way, so I am talking through experience. When this realization came to me from within, I just instantly droped the whole idea of ever letting anyone control me again, it was as if I was set free from a prison that I erected from my own insecurity, its great to be FREE.

Dear Psycos
I do not want relationship with my flame until he reaches the same level of understanding. I do not beleive that the connection between two souls even connected as to in the case of twinflames can be maximized or be successful unless BOTH are ready to evolve. But you sound like you gave up on the relationship altogether, am I right? Have you found your soulmate, twinsoul would you think the same? As I am new I may have missed out on your previous threads, sorry if I make you to repeat yourself.. Looking forward to your reply

[psychoslice]

Originally Posted by 17 yrs of separation

Dear Psycos
I do not want relationship with my flame until he reaches the same level of understanding. I do not beleive that the connection between two souls even connected as to in the case of twinflames can be maximized or be successful unless BOTH are ready to evolve. But you sound like you gave up on the relationship altogether, am I right? Have you found your soulmate, twinsoul would you think the same? As I am new I may have missed out on your previous threads, sorry if I make you to repeat yourself.. Looking forward to your reply

Hi, I didn't really give up on relationships, I still have relationships but there fiends that I don't need to be with them 24/7 or take them home to bed lol. I don't like labels such as TF and SM, it becomes an ideology and even a religion where they all want to get together and discus there beliefs in their new found so called lovers. You and everyone else is connected to the source or Consciousness, when we do meet someone who allows the source to shine through them, yes we can be drawn to them spiritually but what I have seen by most concerning TF and SM is nothing but neurotic behavior. Stop labeling yourself and keep within your true SELF and live from there, then if someone comes along and would like to share their life with you and you would like to share your life also then of course, this is how it should be.But if you want something from a relationship you will never be happy, this is nothing but being a parasite, as soon as the the love you thought was there is no longer there, then you have sucked all that you wanted from the other. A true Relationship gives, shares, allows, it is letting the other grow, by this you also let yourself grow.

[psychoslice]

My Soul mate even though I don't belive in the concept, is my sister, this is me and her when as children.