I'm scared and want to go home

Originally Posted by Evaah

As for depression.. it's not so much the uncertainty causing the depression. Yeah, I want to go "home", but I'm feeling a little like an outcast in my family right now, so that's also contributing to the depression. It's not major depression, and I'm certainly not suicidal.

Don't most universities have lots of clubs? See if there is a meditation group there. Look outside the college, in the town. Are there meditation, yoga, tai chi, pagan groups out there that you can join? You will often find they are there if you search hard enough. Joining one of these will give you the face to face companionship you need. Ask the guys upstairs for some friends that are spiritual.

But also, try to be young and do the wild and crazy things you are supposed to do at college. I was too sensible when I was your age and feel like I missed out on a lot.

You'll be fine. Let those things in the future happen in the future. Concentrate on enjoying the now

[Westleigh]

Evaah,

I know I'm a little late, but I wanted to add my tuppence to this thread. I have felt this way. I would like you to know that having a spiritual understanding at a young age is an advantage, not a disadvantage - potentially a very great one. I agree with others who said that your fear is not related to spirituality as such, but simply to fear of the unknown, which is completely understandable.

It's true that we set challenges for ourselves before we arrive here, but you must learn to trust in your higher self - both in the choices that that part of you made, and also in its guidance. As you grow spiritually and more closely connect with your spirit guidance you will grow to trust in the process and know that things are brought to you to learn when you are ready - as are the tools for you to work through them. We never set ourselves a project without first ensuring that what we need to complete it is available to us. Our spirit selves do not fear, so when you came to Earth it was in the spirit of adventure and excitement, with great hopes for the things you would learn and the greater joy and understanding of yourself it would bring. Try to recapture a little of that sense of adventure. You have the advantage of the knowledge that you are an eternal spiritual being and nothing can truly harm you, so your task is to manage the emotions you are feeling in your human body so they do not hold you back. Don't feel pathetic because your emotions are illogical - understanding and managing our human emotions is really the greatest challenge we face. If we didn't experience these strong emotions, nothing which happened to us would ever feel difficult!

I would like to share a simple technique with you: Whenever you feel afraid, apprehensive, guilty, upset, or any other negative emotion, instead of trying to hide from that emotion or suppress it as most of us do, visualise yourself opening to it, and welcoming it. Affirm to yourself that you welcome this emotion and invite it to pass through you, heal, and transform into love and acceptance.

It may sound too easy, but if you do this every time you feel unhappy, guilty or afraid, you will discover you have far more mastery of your emotional state than you imagined. If we fight or suppress a feeling, it stays with us, but by accepting and welcoming it we set it free.

I hope you will enjoy college. :)

[Michelle11]

Evaah,

I have felt the way you have. Feeling homesick when I am home. Life can be daunting but you will surprise yourself how much strength you have when the tough times show up. Take some time to walk through what you are feeling. if you need to cry, cry. Release your fears and know that you are one step ahead of most. You are conscious of your process and therefore much more equipped to handle the rough spots as they unfold. So please do not feel pathetic. There is no need. And please do not feel as though you need to be perfect. IMO perfect leaves us no where else to go and therefore purposeless. In any event perfection is not expected of you. You are only expected to try. And your intentions are in the right place. You want to do good and therefore you are pointed in the right direction. As you paint the picture of your life make sure you love yourself in the process. That is really all God wants of you. Take care sweetie. Things are going to be just fine.

Love
Michelle

[Evaah]

Ah, thanks you two.
I do feel a lot better since I posted this, but you two still managed to bring me to tears, haha. I'm trying to develop a self-confident attitude ("Bring it on!"), so we'll see how that works. Thanks for that tip, West - I'll apply that in the future.

I start college a week from today, so I'm all antsy and nervous. I'll keep all your comments in mind.

Hello Evaah,

When ever I get to stressing and fretting I use good old Byron Katies questions to meditate on the matter thats agreiving me. The questions are as follows.

Is it true ?

Can it be absolutely true ?

How do I react when I believe that thought ?

What would it be like if it were not true . Who would you be without that thought ?

What would happen if the opposite of the thought is the truth ?

[Evaah]

Originally Posted by Neville

Hello Evaah,

When ever I get to stressing and fretting I use good old Byron Katies questions to meditate on the matter thats agreiving me. The questions are as follows.

Is it true ?

Can it be absolutely true ?

How do I react when I believe that thought ?

What would it be like if it were not true . Who would you be without that thought ?

What would happen if the opposite of the thought is the truth ?

Thank you, Neville! Your posts are always very wise.