Did I make a mistake?

[forevergirl]

Hi and hope everyone is off to a great 2012!

I might have a problem. A professor-same age range as me-I had a previous semester did something for me that helped me get an A in his class. I felt I wanted to give him a small "gift" to a bar/eatery in town...very small amount to thank him. He is married and happily,I believe. Anyways, I left this in his campus mailbox and now wonder if I should have. I "feel" like he is upset/??? with me about this. Just the feeling I have and don't know why. I purposely made sure I gave it to him after I was a former student. I want to take another class with him in the fall but not sure now.

Anyone pick up anything? His first initial is d. Thanks. Can't sleep tonight for some reason.

L

Forevergirl I'm PMing you

[forevergirl]

Thanks to beautydylan Everything is amazingly good!

[psychoslice]

No, you haven't done nothing wrong, he maybe wanting to keep the professor student relationship thing separate, without have favoritism on both side ?.

Hello there forevergirl, I would not worry about it, or loose sleep over it, you know what your intentions were when you sent the note. It seems like you sent the note with a genuine heart so I really would not worry about how that is interpreted... thats out of your hands....So so long as you know your reasons and your reasons were genuine I truly would not worry...

SoulSparkles

[forevergirl]

Originally Posted by psychoslice

No, you haven't done nothing wrong, he maybe wanting to keep the professor student relationship thing separate, without have favoritism on both side ?.

Thanks psychoslice for adding your thoughts! That is why I waited a month until final grades were posted. I would never risk his chance at tenure. Everything is great, he loved it!

Thanks once again.

[forevergirl]

Originally Posted by SoulSparkles

Hello there forevergirl, I would not worry about it, or loose sleep over it, you know what your intentions were when you sent the note. It seems like you sent the note with a genuine heart so I really would not worry about how that is interpreted... thats out of your hands....So so long as you know your reasons and your reasons were genuine I truly would not worry...

SoulSparkles

Thank you. I am a big believer in that if someone does a random act of kindness for me, I do it for them.

Originally Posted by forevergirl

Hi and hope everyone is off to a great 2012!

I might have a problem. A professor-same age range as me-I had a previous semester did something for me that helped me get an A in his class. I felt I wanted to give him a small "gift" to a bar/eatery in town...very small amount to thank him. He is married and happily,I believe. Anyways, I left this in his campus mailbox and now wonder if I should have. I "feel" like he is upset/??? with me about this. Just the feeling I have and don't know why. I purposely made sure I gave it to him after I was a former student. I want to take another class with him in the fall but not sure now.

Anyone pick up anything? His first initial is d. Thanks. Can't sleep tonight for some reason.

If you just left a some type of gift card from a local bar/eartery that he can use with his wife, it is perfectly fine.

I had given a similar gift card to my old prefessors when they took their personal time to help me with my projects in the past. I normally gave them a note that stated "thank you so much and please enjoy it with your family" along with the gift card.

However, if you were asking to taking him to a bar or eatery alone with you, it is NOT a right thing to do since it would put him in an ackward situation with his wife.

If he is a single, it is OK.
Never pursue a married man (whether or not his marriage is happy or not. All marriages go through ups and downs.).

There are 6 billion people on this earth. Half of them are opposite sex and most are singles, you do NOT need to pursue a married person.

If you want to purse a married man (I am not stating that this is your motive), you need to question why you want that kind of man (who cheats on his wife) and why you deserve that kind of unbalanced/uphappy/drama filled relationship.

However, single and unattached professors are fair games.
At one time in my school years when I was a single, I was very much interested in one of my instructors who was a single (very handsome and hot) and I asked him to a dinner while using "thanking you for your help".
He took the bait and actually paid for the dinner. He also told me later that he wanted to ask me out as well but he was not sure if it was proper. We were in a relationship after that for one year and almost married. WE WERE BOTH SINGLES.

At another time, after a semester, one of my professor (few years older and who was working on his PhD at the same college) asked me out for a date. After we ran into each other outside of the school, he actually got my name from the school database and called me. Since we were both singles and I wanted a date (curious about him), I went out with him. I was actually very flattered. WE WERE BOTH SINGLES.

[Adrienne]

Originally Posted by Nada

If he is a single, it is OK.
Never pursue a married man (whether or not his marriage is happy or not. All marriages go through ups and downs.).

There are 6 billion people on this earth. Half of them are opposite sex and most are singles, you do NOT need to pursue a married person.

If you want to purse a married man (I am not stating that this is your motive), you need to question why you want that kind of man (who cheats on his wife) and why you deserve that kind of unbalanced/uphappy/drama filled relationship.

OH OH ! I can hear the TFs disagreeing with you on all of the above, lol !

However, single and unattached professors are fair games.

hee hee, on the " fair game " comment ! I wonder what they would think if they heard this ? Cute comment

At one time in my school years when I was a single, I was very much interested in one of my instructors who was a single (very handsome and hot) and I asked him to a dinner while using "thanking you for your help".
He took the bait and actually paid for the dinner. He also told me later that he wanted to ask me out as well but he was not sure if it was proper. We were in a relationship after that for one year and almost married. WE WERE BOTH SINGLES.

At another time, after a semester, one of my professor (few years older and who was working on his PhD at the same college) asked me out for a date. After we ran into each other outside of the school, he actually got my name from the school database and called me. Since we were both singles and I wanted a date (curious about him), I went out with him. I was actually very flattered. WE WERE BOTH SINGLES.

I just took the lazy way out and replied inside your message

In reading forevergirl's posts it seemed to me she just wanted to say thank you with no ulterior motives

Originally Posted by forevergirl

I am a big believer in that if someone does a random act of kindness for me, I do it for them

[quote=Dream Angel]OH OH ! I can hear the TFs disagreeing with you on all of the above, lol !


LOL LOL
Yeah, those TFs are stubborn and obsessive bunch.
Hopefully, they do not venture out to this side of forums.