Meditation Help

Hello... Ive been meditating twice daily if not more for nearly 5 months.. my practice lasts anywhere from 15 minutes to two hours (depends on whenever I decide to open my eyes). For some reason I keep having trouble with posture. I either get too relaxed and begin to fall backward or I make myself so tense that my back begins to ache under my right shoulder-blade.
Sometimes I go so deeply that a grid of purple light appears in my line of sight.
Ive recently been remembering my dreams and even dreams from my childhood long forgotten... does anyone know what is going on? Also, what are the purple/white lights that flash after my body goes numb?
So many questions..
I got told that without practice the average being goes through sleep paralysis usually only once. Before I ever started meditation, sleep paralysis was almost a twice a week thing... id suddenly wake up from a nightmare, frozen in fear and a high pitched, whirling siren sound would be with me..
I'm so over-run with questions that I can't make sense of any of this. Any answers? Please...

Hi Derek,

As for your posture, it depends. If it is a normal postural problem, you should make sure that during meditation, you are aware enough to simply adjust your posture as needed. Even though you are in a deep state, this level of awareness is usually necessary for effective meditation. If your body has the "urge" to tighten up or contort into these positions (called Kriyas in some circles), I've found that allowing my body to do what it will and then correcting my posture after it passes is the best way to deal with this.

With regards to the grid of purple light and the dreams, there is a Zen saying "If you meet the Buddha, kill the Buddha.". While it isn't literal, of course, what it points to is the fact that we shouldn't attach ourselves to any spiritual experiences during meditation because many are just perceptions that will pass. True spiritual awareness will bear itself out over years of practice and you will know by simple observation. If it is any help, my dreams are more vivid and memorable during meditation as well and I also see patterns of light (or occasionally feel a warming light) during meditation. One of the biggest obstacles to enlightenment, according to MANY masters is getting stuck on spiritual experiences (the Buddhists may symbolize this as the "God realms") and becoming so intoxicated with them that you never achieve enlightenmient, so I'd be very wary of this sort of interpretation.

I don't know where you heard that one bout of sleep paralysis is what "normal" people go through, but I've certainly gone through more (and I go through them rarely). Also, people with certain conditions such as narcoleptics with cataplexy go through them multiple times daily. When it comes to the human body, I wouldn't listen to anyone's definition of "normal". Anyways, hope this helps. Have a wonderful day.

-TaoSandwich

[jonesboy]

Two methods:

One, sit in bed with a couple of pillows behind your back. After that just relax and don't worry about it. Over time your muscles will get stronger.

Two, buy a zafu. Having your knees below your waist helps relieve back pain.

Okay thank you both for answering... I will give it a shot