Inner Child Exercises --- Everyone contribute!

[sound]

Originally Posted by Xan

..... what I know as Zen slaps which really only come from a Zen master of the art form.

Yes ... to my senses, the slaps occurring here are far removed from Zen, in nature ...

Please know that I do this with great Buddhist compassion and affection.

FAQs
What is a zen slap?
*zen slap*
By what authority can you give zen slaps?
*zen slap*
Are you a Zen Master?
*zen slap*
Are you really a Druid?
*zen slap*
What is the Order?
*zen slap*
No really, tell me, without the slap.
Oh all, right. The order is I, slap,you. *zen slap*
Who is in the Order?
*zen slap*
Can I be part of the Order?
*zen slap*
Can I zen slap?
No
Why not?
*zen slap*
When should I expect a zen slap?
*zen slap*
OW! That hurts!
At last, I wondered when you'd get it!

That should answer all you questions. Any further questions and you deserve a zen slap.

FAQ update

I'm not a Zen student and have no interest in Zen, does that mean I won't get zen slapped?
*zen slap*
I'm sorry for asking

Are there inappropriate times and places for a zen slap?
Are there inappropriate times to realise something? (*zen slap* in disguise)

Why does Druidry need zen slaps?
Do you see this branch? (look for a real branch to simulate this)
Yes
*zen branch thwack* Did you feel that? (don't actually simulate it)
OW!!! You b*****d, yes I b*****y well did!
Good. If you can see something and feel something then there is no need to visualise that something.

I'm a sadomasochist and I think that this zen slap thing is a really good idea. Slap me!
Zen slaps aren't for you, they'd never work, go away.

My skin is very fragile and bruises easily, I really can't be zen slapped. By doctors orders
That's fine, *devillish zen laugh* zen slap come in many, unexpected, forms
*gulp*

There are no Zen masters. There are no Zen students. Zen cannot be taught. Zen cannot be learnt. Zen just is. Zen Buddhism is a joke. Laugh (or I zen slap you).
http://www.druidry.org/board/dhp/vie....php?......and thanks to Tree God..from beliefnet.com

Originally Posted by silent whisper

Please know that I do this with great Buddhist compassion and affection.

FAQs
What is a zen slap?
*zen slap*
By what authority can you give zen slaps?
*zen slap*
Are you a Zen Master?
*zen slap*
Are you really a Druid?
*zen slap*
What is the Order?
*zen slap*
No really, tell me, without the slap.
Oh all, right. The order is I, slap,you. *zen slap*
Who is in the Order?
*zen slap*
Can I be part of the Order?
*zen slap*
Can I zen slap?
No
Why not?
*zen slap*
When should I expect a zen slap?
*zen slap*
OW! That hurts!
At last, I wondered when you'd get it!

That should answer all you questions. Any further questions and you deserve a zen slap.

FAQ update

I'm not a Zen student and have no interest in Zen, does that mean I won't get zen slapped?
*zen slap*
I'm sorry for asking

Are there inappropriate times and places for a zen slap?
Are there inappropriate times to realise something? (*zen slap* in disguise)

Why does Druidry need zen slaps?
Do you see this branch? (look for a real branch to simulate this)
Yes
*zen branch thwack* Did you feel that? (don't actually simulate it)
OW!!! You b*****d, yes I b*****y well did!
Good. If you can see something and feel something then there is no need to visualise that something.

I'm a sadomasochist and I think that this zen slap thing is a really good idea. Slap me!
Zen slaps aren't for you, they'd never work, go away.

My skin is very fragile and bruises easily, I really can't be zen slapped. By doctors orders
That's fine, *devillish zen laugh* zen slap come in many, unexpected, forms
*gulp*

There are no Zen masters. There are no Zen students. Zen cannot be taught. Zen cannot be learnt. Zen just is. Zen Buddhism is a joke. Laugh (or I zen slap you).
http://www.druidry.org/board/dhp/vie....php?......and thanks to Tree God..from beliefnet.com

Post of the month!

Originally Posted by silent whisper

Your zen slap does not hurt a bit Xan...perfectly timed and shared...

IMO, Xan is modest and accepting - to a fault.

But that's okay - that's why we love her (Tzu included)!

I find this whole 'zen slap' conversation very interesting.

I find just about everybody likes to deliver an admonishment, but practically nobody likes to receive one. This will be argued with and various justifactions proffered, but nonetheless and for whatever reason reading over the last few pages (or topics!) verifies this readily.

LOL.

Originally Posted by Xan

Sometimes we may feel slapped by someone without their intention to do so. Regardless... whatever we feel from someone else's words and actions is within our own minds.
Xan

I dunno, if a Zen master slapped me, I'd say that my stinging cheek was not created within my own mind. It was created by his hand. Or are you saying because I asked a question I deserved the slap? Because I have a problem with that.

Originally Posted by SerpentQueen

I dunno, if a Zen master slapped me, I'd say that my stinging cheek was not created within my own mind. It was created by his hand. Or are you saying because I asked a question I deserved the slap? Because I have a problem with that.

What problem would that be, exactly?

Originally Posted by Xan

Real Zen slaps that show someone themselves - the surface identity and the true self - are brief and to the point, perfectly timed and come from clear intuition... something that can only happen from inner awareness.
Xan

"The master appears when the student is ready."

You place too much emphasis on the master's skill, to perfectly time the slap from clear intuition. I say that the student deserves more of the credit.

It is possible that the slap only seemed perfectly timed. It is possible the timing of the slap was only pure luck and coincidence. It is possible anyone could become a master when the student is finally ready.

Originally Posted by Humm

What problem would that be, exactly?

It's saying "it's all your fault I slapped you." You don't have a problem with that?

Originally Posted by silent whisper

Please know that I do this with great Buddhist compassion and affection.

FAQs
What is a zen slap?
*zen slap*
By what authority can you give zen slaps?
*zen slap*
Are you a Zen Master?
*zen slap*
Are you really a Druid?
*zen slap*
What is the Order?
*zen slap*
No really, tell me, without the slap.
Oh all, right. The order is I, slap,you. *zen slap*
Who is in the Order?
*zen slap*
Can I be part of the Order?
*zen slap*
Can I zen slap?
No
Why not?
*zen slap*
When should I expect a zen slap?
*zen slap*
OW! That hurts!
At last, I wondered when you'd get it!

That should answer all you questions. Any further questions and you deserve a zen slap.

FAQ update

I'm not a Zen student and have no interest in Zen, does that mean I won't get zen slapped?
*zen slap*
I'm sorry for asking

Are there inappropriate times and places for a zen slap?
Are there inappropriate times to realise something? (*zen slap* in disguise)

Why does Druidry need zen slaps?
Do you see this branch? (look for a real branch to simulate this)
Yes
*zen branch thwack* Did you feel that? (don't actually simulate it)
OW!!! You b*****d, yes I b*****y well did!
Good. If you can see something and feel something then there is no need to visualise that something.

I'm a sadomasochist and I think that this zen slap thing is a really good idea. Slap me!
Zen slaps aren't for you, they'd never work, go away.

My skin is very fragile and bruises easily, I really can't be zen slapped. By doctors orders
That's fine, *devillish zen laugh* zen slap come in many, unexpected, forms
*gulp*

There are no Zen masters. There are no Zen students. Zen cannot be taught. Zen cannot be learnt. Zen just is. Zen Buddhism is a joke. Laugh (or I zen slap you).
http://www.druidry.org/board/dhp/vie....php?......and thanks to Tree God..from beliefnet.com

You should post this in the End of Questions thread.

Okay this is the first I ever heard of a Zen slap, but if this story demonstrates what it is meant by it, I think it's far more relevant to the End of Questions discussion. This isn't about a Zen Master perfectly timing a slap to break through surface identity and true self, etc, etc... it's about a zen master demonstrating that every time you plague yourself with another unanswerable question, you cause your own self suffering.

Context is everything, no?