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What will happen to my less than perfect soul?
I am what you would call a mystic, I have experienced three powerful mental upheavals, that have changed my perception of who I am, I am simple and like an innocent child. The first mental upheaval was when the masculine Christian creation deity was revealed in my imagination, the spiritual illumination was the product of a powerful intuition, the day of judgement happened for me in that instant, I became divine spirit in a permanent state of religious spiritual ecstasy, this happened within my unconscious mind, within the unconscious mental image of the father. In an instant I was in space, in eternity and face to face with the Christian Godhead, technically I was born again as a Saint in Heaven. But I had inner demons, though my Spirit was perfect and divine my soul was not, I had a black demonic soul, no redeeming features, but over the past 20 years, inspired by a God revealed in my heart and imagination I freed myself from these terrible destructive demons, acute neuroses, 6 months ago I confessed a great sin and freed myself from a more normal neurosis and attained a valid enlightenment. I can think clearly, am rational and have achieved the object of a full Jungian psychological analysis. I say this just to give you a background of myself, I am inspired by what Christian theologians call God the Father, I am divine spirit, with God in Heaven, but I am also very rational, though I am immortal I am simple, I have nothing in my intellect, because of the way my psyche and soul have unfolded I have the intellect of an infant but I do now have quite complete access to the rational left hemisphere of my psyche. So I am in heaven with God and you would think that would be enough, but I am the hero inspired by love, and legend says that the hero, after descending into the underworld to rescue the maiden and defeating the demon, incurs a deep psychological wound, this legend applies to me, I do have a deep wound in my soul, but I am actively healing it. What concerns me is my Soul not my Spirit, what will happen to my soul after I let go of my shell, I have done wicked things for most of my life, I still run an internet business like a ruthless businessman, but I have no choice but to create beauty, I must create for God is my Father, so I am far from perfect and though I have been redeeming myself for many years I still wonder about my karma, I'me not kidding I have done wicked things, I have lied, cheated stolen, I have never killed a man or raped a woman but I have done just about everything else, now God says to me, don't worry, I have given you immortal life, not literally, he doesn't say much, he just creates the universe, but that's the feeling I get. But what happens to my Soul, to my feminine aspect, legend says the hero bears a psychological wound that can never be fully healed, this means I cannot perfect my Soul, this is the cross I have to bear, but what will happen to my less than perfect Soul when I die, I am immortal, I will not die, therefore I will continue, my spiritual soul will continue after death, but after that my intellect fails me, my intuition tells me that reincarnation is the key, I guess I am some kind of Angel, but it is the bad karma attached to my actions that concerns me, that God will have mercy on me I have no doubt, I have faithfully served him in Heaven for 30 years, but will I have the option of returning in some way, I would return for the sake of my only beloved daughter Eden, I ask the question what will happen to my spiritual soul.
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