unoffendable

~smiles~ Thanks Sound and arive.
Posts are saved and I have begun reading and replying.
Always a joy to spend time with others.

Reply to tragblack

This is why Wilhelm Reich prescribed frequent masturbation.

One could masterbate their brains out but it won't resolve the problem. It only relieves the symptoms of it.
It is helpful to give oneself temporary relieve so one can continue the journey toward finding the source of a problem.
But it's not helpful if that practice is believed to be the solution to the underlying problem.
"Hey, no more frustration/pain, I mustn't have the problem anymore."

Also, another unproductive loop can be formed that way.
To alleviate pain by experiencing pleasure can create a pattern of keeping the original problem as an excuse to experience the pleasure.
"I've had a hard day at work, I need a beer or two."
"I'm so stressed out, I need a smoke(both types) to calm me down."
I don't know the full story of Wilhelm Reich's theories, or the context of what you have quoted of him so this observation may be inaccurate,
but he seems to be prescribing addiction.

Your reasoning sounds a bit like The Four Agreements.

I would not be surprised. On my journey I am regularly hearing and reading things that are equal or similar to my thoughts.
I conclude it's because I and the other has tapped into into the same databank of information.
I still burst with joy whenever these types of thought synchronicities occur in my life, just no longer surprised.
A small glimpse of this Oneness concept that underlies the individualism of this physical realm perhaps.

Usually, they have derived from more literal translations over time.

Some data/examples would be nice tragblack, because when I think of the cows one, all I get is this...

The saying "Till the cows come home" puzzles me somewhat.
So many unanswered questions like...
Why did they leave?
How come no one saw them leave?
How long was it before anyone noticed they were gone?
Who helped them escape, because they didn't open the gates on their own....or did they?
Why didn't someone just follow their tracks and find them?
Did they really leave or did someone move the farm?
If someone did move the farm, why did they leave the cows behind?
Were the cows secretly responsible for moving the farm and that's why there were no tracks to follow.
Why don't the cows want to be found?
Is the farm their real home?
Are the cows stationary objects and the farm is alive and moving all the time around the cows?
Are the cows the "home" and the farm the "cows"?
Why did the farm leave and when will it return?

I work in reverse!

In reverse or equally?
Because if in reverse, are you saying if you cut yourself, you wouldn't do anything about it, you would avoid the problem?

[GentleStrength]

Thank you for posting this AC, I enjoyed it and many of the ideas resonated within me as truth.

To share how I have gotten to a similar place as you, I originally separated other people actions by what I felt their intent to be. If they didn't intend to hurt me but said something that I could take in a way that caused me pain, I decided I would no longer react by becoming hurt. I could then communicate with them that what they said or did could have been interpreted as hurtful but since I wasn't this interaction wasn't a conflict just a sharing.

However, for those that I knew were intentionally trying to cause pain or conflict I did not give them the same free pass. I judged them to be negative and would not necessarily respond in kind but I certainly didn't try and interact with them in a positive way.

Then one day I reached an internal understanding that went something like, "This person is intentionally trying to cause me pain and hurt my feelings".

"So what?"

Even if that is what they are trying to do I realized that I would rather "choose" my response than to "react" to it based upon their intent and the habitual or normal way to respond. If they are choosing to express a negative action I can still choose to both interpret it in a positive way as well as respond to it in a positive manner. I am then expressing myself in a loving way that I would prefer to rather than a negative reaction that could just perpetuate the cycle.

As you were saying about changing your vibration to one that no longer even felt the negative energies being focused upon you I visualize it like this. If I imagine myself as a pure crystalline energy as clear and bright as possible, negative energy and intentions can just pass through me since there is no opaque or cloudiness that would absorb that energy. on the other hand positive energy and light sent my way can be focused, amplified and directed throughout the universe.

Anyways, long winded response basically saying thank you for sharing!

Love and Light

Originally Posted by GentleStrength

Thank you for posting this AC, I enjoyed it and many of the ideas resonated within me as truth.

To share how I have gotten to a similar place as you, I originally separated other people actions by what I felt their intent to be. If they didn't intend to hurt me but said something that I could take in a way that caused me pain, I decided I would no longer react by becoming hurt. I could then communicate with them that what they said or did could have been interpreted as hurtful but since I wasn't this interaction wasn't a conflict just a sharing.

However, for those that I knew were intentionally trying to cause pain or conflict I did not give them the same free pass. I judged them to be negative and would not necessarily respond in kind but I certainly didn't try and interact with them in a positive way.

Then one day I reached an internal understanding that went something like, "This person is intentionally trying to cause me pain and hurt my feelings".

"So what?"

Even if that is what they are trying to do I realized that I would rather "choose" my response than to "react" to it based upon their intent and the habitual or normal way to respond. If they are choosing to express a negative action I can still choose to both interpret it in a positive way as well as respond to it in a positive manner. I am then expressing myself in a loving way that I would prefer to rather than a negative reaction that could just perpetuate the cycle.

As you were saying about changing your vibration to one that no longer even felt the negative energies being focused upon you I visualize it like this. If I imagine myself as a pure crystalline energy as clear and bright as possible, negative energy and intentions can just pass through me since there is no opaque or cloudiness that would absorb that energy. on the other hand positive energy and light sent my way can be focused, amplified and directed throughout the universe.

Anyways, long winded response basically saying thank you for sharing!

Love and Light

I don't know about calling you're response long winded, GentleStrength, I found it more to be like a refreshing breeze.

I like what you had discovered that you have a will to choose what you shall think, feel and do.

I too have discovered this amazing ability within myself and I found it to be a key element
of removing pain, wounds and regaining freedom by leaving the self created prison I build around myself.
The fredom to choose was always there but I wasn't aware of it. It was buried under much.

Haar, just like how Skynet became self aware on such and such a date...
I became aware of this powerful and liberating ability mid 2009.

My whole life, or the majority of it, was controled by the huge amount of external forces(people and circumstances)
"The whole world is against me !", was my constant lament.

But when I finally saw that I was choosing to let this happen...well...wasn't that a wonderous and joyous time.
"Oh, I am totally free to choose, I just had a mountain of opposing thoughts and beliefs that hide that simple but powerful knowledge."

I went from being a powerless entity to one of immense power.
And as I continue my journey, all I see is infinite power to do anything.
Along the way on this discovery journey, as you have also discovered, is love.
Or you were already aware of love but were unable to express it to the level you envisioned.

Like it has been said...
" Be the change you want to see in the world" or " lead by example."
Love comes into the world through people.
Remove/heal/change what needs to be in oneself so that love radiates out.

I consider one reason why there is so much suffering in the world, due to the unloving thoughts and actions of others,
is because these people are trapped in their hells and are also unable to love others as they would like to.

And like you have discovered of yourself, GentleStrength, you now know how the cycle perpetuates and you have chosen to stop being a part of it.

And as more become aware and stop being part of the destructive cycles apparent in the world, love will flow more into the world.

I like the way you do your energy thing. To be clear is to have nothing that can be affected.

Originally Posted by Sound

True … sometimes realization can occur, however, the solution (to a perceived 'problem') may not always appear on the horizon at the same time. That can mean experiencing a certain level of anxiety until one can let go of old beliefs which don’t align with new understandings. Accompanying dialogue may go something like ...' I know it isn't helping me but i just cant seem to stop myself' ...

I second that True...or is that third it...anyways...

Realisation:
1: Coming to understand something clearly and distinctly.
2: Something that is made real or concrete.

In order to realise a solution, one must have a realisation of the problem.
Acceptance is a part of realisation.
If there is not 100% acceptance, there is no realisation.
One can be intellectually aware, but one can have denial, uncertainty and all manner of opposing/hindering things deeper inside.
As you have said Sound, old beliefs that do not align with the new information.

Case in point: My depression.
For 35+ years I was aware I had problems. I could see/acknowledge the symptoms of this illness, though I had no understanding I had an illness.
I was not aware that my life long personality dysfunctions were being caused by an illness.
7 years ago, upon sharing my symptoms for the first time with a doctor, I became aware I had the illness, Depression.
Now I had something to work on. The culprit had been revealed and for the next 7 years I learnt of it's tactics.
I made progress but I was never completely free from it.
The best I could do was contain it's effects upon the quality of my life.

Coming up to 3 years ago, I found myself in the psych ward after a suicide attempt.
One of the amazing things of the third day there was I kept having these thoughts, " Why am I here, there's nothing wrong with me?"
"Yes I knew I have depression, but why am I in hospital? Hospital is for genuinely sick people?
I know I have issues that I am working on, but hospital? That's a bit extreme don't you think?"

And then the realisation came. "Oh...I'm here because I am sick, hospital is for sick people, Oh...depression is an illness!"
I experienced a blend of joy, anger and fear because I began to see the subtleness of the denial that had been enabled those last 7 years.
Denial founded on the once hidden beliefs and thoughts.

I intellectually knew and understood I had depression and this enabled me to make much progress, but deeper in, there were beliefs of various kinds that were blocking, ignoring, denying all manner of things associated with the desire, thoughts and actions to beat this illness.

The first couple of nights at the psych ward, I would peer out the glass doors at the outside world. It scared me no end.
As I considered the outside world, the world I was to return to, the life I was to return to, I was confronted with death.
That's all that awaited me out there, that's all I could see. Once I leave hospital, death awaits me. My time at the psych ward is but a temporary reprieve.
Depression has brought me to the end of my life. No matter what I did, how much effort, how many different paths, it all lead to death.

But the next day, I once again began re evaluating everything, pondering those questions I mentioned and the subsequent realisations.
It was during that morning, upon musing over these revelations that I had the blackhole/white light vision thingy.( I have a text file of it somewhere's on my puta)
Within a day or so, I was walking to the shops over the street, beaming with wonder and joy. Still physically anxious but internally calm, peaceful and empowered.

A year after hospital, I was totally cured. I wasn't even aware I could cure it, I was simply continuing my journey toward containment/overcoming.
So, the time from realisation of symptoms to realisation of the cause(depression), was 40ish years.
From realisation of illness to realisation of cure was 7 years.
But even in that 7 year period, there was the realisation of self denial that was working against the realisation of the illness.
Realising I had the illness was a major breakthough. I made considerable progress with that knowing.
But it was only part of the equations. The other part was realising the denial mechanisms and removing them.

The reward for all that effort, far above and beyond being cured of depression, of obtaining the life I searched for all those years, of regaining self control/self empowerment, of being free...
Gee, what could be more amazing that all of those things...
This realisation...any thing is possible.

There is a fine line between knowing/understanding a thing, and realising a thing.
I think the difference is the total acceptance, the zero lack of uncertainty, doubt.
The moment you come to a place of total acceptance and thus total commitment to act.
With doubt, fear and uncertainty, one will hesitate to act, one will not be able to choose because one is not totally sure.

Also, as you have stated, there is anxiety till the old beliefs can be let go.
The healing/transformation/growth journey is one of going from one state to another.
The security of the known has to be relinquished in order to embrace the new.
And because it is new, it is unknown. There may be a level of understanding, of seeing this is the way to go, but there is still unknowns.
And it's human nature to fear the unknown, but the only way to transform the unknown into the known is to experience it,
to incorporate it into your psyche, to remove that which opposes it.

And notice how you said, "can be let go". The hinderances of transformation/healing/growth are also controled by self.
The creation of them, the holding onto them and the relinquishing of them are all controled by self.
The journey of self discovery reveals everything that is required to acheive this.
It's a journey from suffering to joy, prison to freedom, turmoil to peace/calm, impossible to possible, fearful retraction to expansive love.
And it's all acheived by self. How awesome is that !

There's a lot more to life than one thinks and it's the explorers who are the ones who discover this.

I can relate in regards to your speed limit story. I used to experience incredibly high levels of fear around being misunderstood or misinterpreted. I worried about how that caused people to see me in a light which I, myself found to be ‘oppositional’ I suppose, is the word I am looking for. We are unusual creatures aren’t we … I have realized though, through experience, (in relation to myself of course), that often times light will be shed 'through' our thoughts and indeed increase our understandings because of that, without needing to actualize those situations etc. does that make sense AC?

Yes. I call it exploring. The same thing scientists do when testing a theory.
Observe, formulate, test, collect data, repeat till issue is sorted.

Lots of running commentary (of mind) in the process of course … and it is almost as if we ‘live our thoughts’ sometimes in a subconscious effort to self preserve lol that scenario obviously works on the premise of ‘less (actualized)pain, more gain lol that paragraph turned into a rant of sorts didn’t it …

Ha, yes it did. Rants are wonderful things. A free flow through numerous things, showing the links between them.
Well, our thoughts create our life. What we think today, determines our tomorrows.
The problem is the unknown thoughts that reside in our subconscious that control our destiny.
The solution is to know these subconscious thoughts.
Can't fix what one doesn't know or can't see.

I am not a fan of the theory that the contents of the subconscious can never be known.
I look at it this way. Self exploration, increase in self awareness will reveal all of self.
Doesn't bother me if others think or believe things in the subconscious can never be known.
Isn't this the whole mandate of Knowing Self?
I mean, what is this thing called Subconscious? Something underneath the conscious, at a deeper level of the conscious.

If it's mine, I have every right and ability to access it.
Far as I can logically conjecture, the only thing stopping me from accessing these areas is myself and I've been pretty successful so far, access wise.

you (silently) give folk permission to explore stuff which may, at first, seem significantly insignificant … that is your gift in a sense I reckon Mr AC

I get what you're saying Sound, though I see it slightly differently and the implications of this different view are huge.
I don't give people permission, they choose to venture forth into themselves, they give themselves permission.
All I do is lead by example. I share what I have achieved and seen by exploring myself, I show the possibilities.
Others see my life, my example and they choose to either follow or not. Not to follow me as I have no idea where I am going or what I am doing.
But others may be inspired to take their own explorative journeys into the wonder and beauty of themselves.
"Hey, look what he's doing...I might give that a go."

I enjoy walking with fellow self exploration travellers, sharing, supporting, hearing of their adventures etc, but I am not imparting anything onto another apart from sharing my experiences.
The empowerment and the inspiration of the other is all self done. And that is the beauty of it. It's all self done.
My gift therefore, is sharing what I have received from all my efforts...life.

Most definitely and, in recent times, I have found the confidence to address ‘pending’ issues (non related to the thinness thing) in exactly that manner … I tend to use a little humor to support what it is I am attempting to extrapolate lol

~smiles~ Oh my...life without humor...I dare not contemplate a world such as this.

Yes … and even when an honest answer is not forthcoming, chances are it will encourage self reflection at some point … from both perspectives of course …

Every moment has enough data to fill eleventee hundred libraries, it's up to the individual to choose to go read.

I find myself smiling too when I think about it many years down the track,however it used to annoy me no end back then … I used to think ‘I don’t make the same old joke about your bloody boisterous and outspoken manner being felt for days after you do actually do go home’ hahaha .. I loved him dearly though ... he was fun and spontaneous and rugged and loved playing the devils advocate ... another thing he drummed into us ... he always used to tell us "Don't think yourself any better, but certainly don't think yourself any worse' :)

From that one thing you quoted of him, I saw a beautiful man.

Great example … and also that old 'if you defend yourself then you must be guilty' of whatever it is that has been highlighted.

Been reading a book, 50 Psychology ideas you really need to know by Adrian Furnham.
A little light reading type of book as each idea is briefly explained within 2-3 pages.
I like the quotes contained within.

"If subjects describe any of the Rorschach inkblots as an inkblot, this is regarded as a defensive response." - Paul Kline,1993

~laughs~ Like you said...humans are unusual creatures.

One of the funniest things I like about the tv show, Frasier, is you have two brilliantly intelligent, articulate and insightful main characters,
and they are as messed up as anyone else, if not more.

An element of this freedom I now live in is I don't care what other's think of me.
I know who I am and if another chooses to evaluate me in a negative light, so what !
If a person is so convinced they know, who am I to disrupt their world.
But if a person wants to get into things, I'm there.

Hehe … likewise AC accompanied by a thousand thank yous’

I'm enjoying our time together.

[sound]

Once again thank you for such a thoughtful and in-depth response AC ... I will pick it back up on the weekend ... enjoying our exchanges also

Sound...YAY !

And arive, I'm just beginning to write my reply to your last post.
It will most likely take longer than the last one.
Or maybe it will take less.

Here's some profound food for thought.
It's Bruce Lipton's closing remarks from his presentation.

Here's the vid 12:40 into the vid.

"You are powerful beyond anything you've ever imagined, but then you have to recognise responsibility."

He then states this...
"You are personally responsible for everything in your life."

To which he shares how many would become upset upon hearing this claim.
So he has updated this statement to this.

"You are personally responsible for everything in your life;
once you become aware that you are personally responsible for everything in your life."

[sound]

Originally Posted by Alternate Carpark

Been reading a book, 50 Psychology ideas you really need to know by Adrian Furnham.
A little light reading type of book as each idea is briefly explained within 2-3 pages. I like the quotes contained within.

"If subjects describe any of the Rorschach inkblots as an inkblot, this is regarded as a defensive response." - Paul Kline,1993

Well there you go ... very cool ... I look up at my bookshelf behind my computer screen and locate my little book of '50 philosophy ideas you really need to know' ... by Ben Dupre different author but i am thinking same ideas yeah?

I haven't read it all however, yes i agree, it does contain some quotes, which are quite the bomb ...

[sound]

Originally Posted by Alternate Carpark

I get what you're saying Sound, though I see it slightly differently and the implications of this different view are huge. I don't give people permission, they choose to venture forth into themselves, they give themselves permission.

Just pulling bits and pieces out as I go AC ... yes to the above ... poor choice of words on my behalf. You encourage people is what you do ... purely through your ability to 'relate' ...

Part 1 of 3

Originally Posted by arive nan

I am still reading through the posts. I’ve had some thoughts about it so far. And since it will be a while before I read through it all I figured I’d post a description of what I see in my mind so far, for those who want to take a look around it. Sorry for all the mess, though. There are lots of things in here that I can’t make heads nor tails of either...

Yet a mess is simply the complete picture all jumbled up. What you seek is in the mess.

I find you speak openly, expansively and thoughtfully arive.
And it's one of the reasons why my replies are long, you give me much to respond to.

This time, lots of questions in this set of replies.
You are under no obligation or pressure to share your answers to any of the questions I present arive.
The questions are for you and also the answers are for you. The exploration is your journey.
Though I willingly walk with you as far as you feel comfortable.

I say this because self exploration can become quite painful, unsettling, scary,(add your own adjective here)
Go as far as you feel ok with, but know that increased understanding/growth/healing/transformation/change comes by going beyond one's current safe/comfort/familiar zone.
The trick is to push beyond just enough to make progress but not too much to become overwhelmed.
Be compassionate and understanding to oneself. "Small steps Ellie...small steps." Dad to young Ellie from the movie, Contact.

Anyhow, there was a short period time in my life when I was someone who I could like and my own thoughts made sense to me. I was a mess when growing up, but over the years I put myself together the way I wanted.

I keep trying to organize my mind enough to get back to that. One problem is that the structure of that organization rested a foundation that included the belief everyone is capable of learning to have more compassion and kindness and therefore more happiness. Then I witnessed some realities that contradicted this belief too much.
With that gone, everything that was built upon it fell apart.
I’ve been trying to pick up the pieces ever since. Now there are so many different parts of my mind disagreeing with each other about so many things,
but they almost all seem to share the opinion that there is not much to like about me.

Interesting you say "you could like yourself..." and not, "you did like yourself..."
Could means one is capable, and not neccessarily one has done so.
You also said, you put yourself together the way you wanted, and not the way you liked.

I theorise even this good period was not picture perfect, thast there was still pain bubbling below?
If you are using 'mess' the same way I do in regards to my old life, then I think I understand what it was like for you,
and what suffering you may still be experiencing.

I keep trying to organize my mind enough to get back to that. One problem is that the structure of that organization rested a foundation that included the belief everyone is capable of learning to have more compassion and kindness and therefore more happiness. Then I witnessed some realities that contradicted this belief too much.

I take it you saw many or extreme examples of people being unloving toward you and others.
But look at your belief. The belief is, people are capable of learning to have more compassion and kindness,
and not that they are being or increasing their compassion and kindness.
I see that unloving actions of others does not contradict your belief. The belief is unchallenged, people are still capable, the potential is still there.

If the belief was "people are growing in compassion and kindness" and people were not growing in these things, then yes, the belief is contradicted.
The capacity of all peoples is there in it's fullness, but people aren't choosing to learn, choosing to become, to increase, to grow.
The potential is there, people aren't accessing it.
The question then becomes, Why aren't they choosing? or What is restricting them? and not, Why aren't they capable?

With that gone, everything that was built upon it fell apart.

That's a logical consequence when a foundation is removed. Beliefs do not make strong foundations.
Santa was real, then he wasn't. The earth was flat, then it was round.
The earth was the center of the universe, then it wasn't, and didn't the religious people of the day freak out when they heard that one.
Gathering more information, more understanding, changed those beliefs.
The problem aren't beliefs. It's what beliefs are founded on, Truth or not.
Belief - any cognitive content held as true.
To put it another way, a belief is labeling a conclusion one has derived from one's perception, as a truth.

But, is your conclusion correct?
What if you use other established beliefs in the equations of the current belief you are formulating and these established beliefs are wrong?
All beliefs must be tested to validate their claims.
Just because people are not growing in compassion and kindness, does not mean they are not capable.
Don't bin that belief because you see no growth in compassion. There are many other factors to consider.

In my mid 30's, me and my pre teen kids were walking at night to the shops.
As we passed under a street lamp, it turned off, and it turned back on again after we passed it.
Street lamps do this regularly, a mechanical/electrical fault of some kind and it's just quirky when it happens at the same time you are there.
My kids thought nothing of it, but I noticed the lamp did not turn off when other people in front of us walked under it.

I was just beginning my exploration journey so the idea of the lamp being affected by one of us caught my attention.
My kids, depending on their emotional state, as we were only a couple of years into the family breakup,
would either be fascinated or annoyed by my strange ideas and bizarre behavior as I would conduct experiments to test these ideas.

"Hang on a sec", as I turned and walked back under the lamp.
"What are you doing?", as they stood there watching me standing under the lamp.
"Elijah, just you, come here under the lamp." He did and the lamp remained lit.
"Ok, Laelaanie, now you." As soon as she came under the lamp, it went out.
The kids still didn't know what all this was for, but they were intrigued this night.
"Ok, you both stay here and I will walk over to there." I did and the lamp remained off.
"Ok, Elijah, come over here." He did and the lamp remained off.
"Ok, now you Laelaaanie." She did and the lamp came back on.
"What's going on dad?", they asked as they weren't taking any notice of the lamp.

They knew something was afoot, but they couldn't see what.
I told them about the lamp and my theory and all three of us conducted more experiments for 30 minutes.
Everytime Laelaanie stepped under the lamp, it turned off.
We tried many variations and each one resulted in her having an instant and continuous affect on the lamp.

We continued onto the shops, discussing the experiments, excited and looking forward to passing under the lamp on the way home.
I shared my concerns of not jumping to conclusions.
"Why were none of the other lamps affected?"
"More tests need to be conducted because it's possible that we just experienced a high dosage of coincidence,
that the lamp is simply faulty and goes off and on just as Laelaanie is under it, even staying off when she stayed under it."
"We shall see when we get back to it."

Coming out of the shops, as we saw the lamp in the distance, it was off. Maybe there was another effector person under it.
As we walked along the path, keeping an eye on the lamp, it came on and there was no one near it.
Before we reached the lamp it had turned off and on again a few times.
We conducted the same experiments and this time, Laelaanie had no affect on it at all.
The lamp turned off and on again regardless of what position any of us took.

On the way to the shop, after the initial experiments, Laelaanie was creating a belief she was affecting it.
I mean gee, the data was pretty convincing.
If we conducted more experiments and the results were the same as the first ones, I too would have created a belief she was affecting it.

I’ve been trying to pick up the pieces ever since. Now there are so many different parts of my mind disagreeing with each other about so many things,

I get how confusing that can be. I can't solve a Rubik's Cube. Too many variables. Too many elements.
I understand how to play chess, but I can only be a few moves ahead, where the masters mentally play the game to it's conclusion for each physical move they make.
And when I had my breakdown in my 20's and my wife leaving me in my 30's...overwhelmed with millions of conflicting thoughts.
Solution...one problem at a time. For you, one disagreement at a time.

There's a puzzle that goes like this.
Two doors. One door leads to death, the other leads to life.
Guarding each door is a robot. One robot can only tell the truth and the other can only tell lies.
You do not know which robot is which and you can only ask one robot one question in order to find out which door leads to life.

There is a solution to this puzzle and there is a solution to all of your inner puzzles.
All puzzles are solved by establishing the facts and using them as the cornerstones of the construction of the answer.
The facts in that puzzle are, one door is life, one door is death, one robot lies and one robot is truthful.
Same with all problems, puzzles and mysteries. There is always a fact, a known amongst the unknowns.

No matter how many different parts of your mind are disagreeing with each other, there are parts that are in agreement.
There are solid foundations within you, find them, acknowledge them, build from them.
If you were in total disagreement, you could not function at all in life.
Sort out the disagreements, one by one.

With an inner disagreement, it's either one part is wrong and the other right, or both are wrong.
Or, they are both right, but there is another part that stops you from seeing that.
Or, one or both are partially right.

It is said the best way to hide a lie is inside a truth.
Present a half truth/half lie and the whole thing is susceptible to be believed as truth.
Politicians are proficient at speaking half truths. But then so again are all of us.

Total honesty with oneself is a vital part of healing.
Compassion, gentleness, patience, non judgementalism/negative criticism, and understanding toward oneself makes this process easier.
Well, those qualities are required all the time and aren't those the qualities of Love?

Each part has to be tested, but if there is so much confusion that it's difficult to establish one truth to work from...
bin the whole lot and start afresh.
Reboot, just like when your puta gets all clogged up. Then with a clean slate, reinitialise one belief, test it, evaluate it.
Accept it if it makes sense, reject it if it doesn't, then reinitialise another.
Sometimes a clean reboot is much quicker than sorting through a tangled mess because you are focused on one thing at a time,
and when you reintroduce a second thing, you can clearly see the effect of that on your system.

but they almost all seem to share the opinion that there is not much to like about me.

What are these disagreeing parts of your mind?
How can they have opinions? Isn't there just one of you?
You may have many conflicting thoughts and beliefs but you are not these things.
These are things you have, that you create and formulate.
How does having conflicting thoughts and beliefs equate to not liking yourself?
Why are you beating yourself up, is it because others have and you have created a belief that you deserve it?

You are not alone arive. I theorise, based on my limited observations, that disliking oneself is a global illness.
It's some kind of human trait that all are afflicted with and I think it has something to do with lack of self awareness.

"If you accept a limiting belief, then it will become a truth for you." - Louise L.Hay

"Self-acceptance is my refusal to be in an adversarial relationship with myself. " - Nathaniel Branden

"The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change." - Carl Rogers

"The limiting beliefs and self-doubts that plague most of us are formidable opponents. One of the most effective ways of dealing with these harsh internal messages is to learn to question every single should and limiting belief with the gentle innocence of children." - Maggie Craddock

My self disliking was so strong that it was a huge part of wanting to end my life, and these self disliking beliefs were established before I was 7.
~laughs~ Yes, I was a prodigy. A gifted child. To be suicidal at 7, that takes a rare gift/ability.
Although that way of looking at it is silly nonsense, there is also profound truth in it to which I have been sharing in this thread thus far.


No more self dislike now, but it took many years of inner exploration to get to this place where I now love who I am.
Though it takes self love to take the journey in the first place, you just don't realise you are loving self while you are hating self.
ie: Everytime you eat when hungry, that is self love.
You only have huge realisations of it when all or most of the wounds are healed, but self love was the driving force that empowered you to that point.