this is a bit weird

I had a dream bout my ex last night who passed away 5years ago. I have been thinking about him a lot lately. I am currently in a relationship were I am emotionally abused. And in my dream he told me basically everything will be fine and we will eventually meet up again.
Weird thing is in my house is a monkey that sings a love song. It goes off sometimes when I walk by. It is not a motion detective stuff animal either and nothing is pressing up against it to hit the button.

Just wondering what you guys thought.

why are you in an emotionally abusive relationship?

Its a lot harder to leave someone that brings you down so low that you don't have confidence in yourself, or the things you do. I am trying to gain my old "self " back though :)

Originally Posted by mel

Its a lot harder to leave someone that brings you down so low that you don't have confidence in yourself, or the things you do. I am trying to gain my old "self " back though :)

Why is it harder to leave someone who abuses you. If he abuses you ... leave. You will never find confidence in yourself while you are with him.

And maybe it's not your 'old self' you should be looking for. Maybe it's a "new you" that should be in your sights. One that feels good enough about herself that she would never *allow* herself to be treated that way.

I'm sorry I'm being harsh here, but stop making excuses. Leave. Get some therapy. If you need to go to a shelter to do it, then do so. But nobody is going to give you the respect you deserve until and unless you are willing to give it to yourself first.

Good luck,
Caat

Originally Posted by mel

Its a lot harder to leave someone that brings you down so low that you don't have confidence in yourself, or the things you do. I am trying to gain my old "self " back though :)

been there done that. depending on how long you have managed to put up with it will depend on when you decide enough is enough. keep your friends close no matter what they say about the relationship. until you are ready to go, you'll need shoulders to cry on before and after.

i would strongly suggest seeing an abuse counselor, you can do this for free through the YWCA, just give them a call.

take care of yourself first and anyone else after that.

Hon...

Do you have ANY family near by? Are you close to your family? If so, call them and tell them what is going on and ask them for help getting out. If you are unable to get your own place, see if you can just move back home for a while to get your bearings and heal.

Also...do this EVERYDAY... look in to the mirror (either at work or home if you're alone) and pretend that the person in the mirror is a friend, sister or someone you care about. Tell that person that you love her, that she is deserving of love, that she can do anything she sets her mind to. Feel free to add any other positive affirmations that you think of. It will feel silly at first, but keep at it. I promise you that it will help you.

This person that you are in a relationship with is totally undeserving of you. The reason that he is being emotionally abusive is that he is hurting inside. He probably has been treated the way he is treating you by his parents. It is sad and unfortunate but you do not have to stay with him. You can not change him, only he can change himself. It is perfectly ok to leave him.