Soulmate/Twinflame: Distinguishing factors.

[miss_believed]

Originally Posted by sesheta

I think maybe it isn't that a TF is your opposite as in opposite personalities, but opposite as in your balancing side :) The one who, like Veronica said, lifts you up when you're down; who calms you when you're angry. Your rock when you feel adrift! And yes, they can push your buttons sometimes, but in my experience so far, it is their way of pushing you to be the better person they already know you are - it's just that sometimes we forget who we really are, and need a nudge! Sometimes that nudge is gentle and kind - sometimes it needs to be a kick in the butt :)

this is so true throughout allof this, all the tears, all the pain, all the heartache, the missing him I have somehow become a person i wouldnt have recognised a year ago. Even the friends I have left, asi have a whole new circle now, they noticed it, they all sayhow much he changed me completely and that it was all worth it. He told me meeting me has changed his life too, I don't know the full details but I think he's been doing some growing too.
It's like even when apart we are encouraging each other to be the best we can be, tough love perhaps lol.
Maybe this is why we have to do a lot of it alone, in person it opens up so many insecurities and fears, walking on egg shells I don;t think we could be tough on theother if we tried so perhaps why it has to be done alone till we get the confidence to speak up and tell the other when they are behaving badly in their eyes!

[Nymphea]

Originally Posted by Neville

As far as I understand.

A Soulmate is virtually another you. you gel in almost every way.

A Twinflame is a kind of opposite number, A Fire to your Ice, A Chalk to your cheese. A twin flame will get you to expand and grow by inviting you to explore areas outside your comfort zones. And yes, this includes pushing your buttons sometimes.

Now ther is no acid test for twin flames as far as I am aware. Years prove that particular pudding . Two different people spend so long together that the twin flame relationship through a series of compromise on both sides begin to co alesce into a soul mate/ Anam Cara partnership.. because obviously the twin flame dynamic works in both directions.

If it cracks, and separation ensues, this is sugestive that the person you saw as your twin flame may not necessarily have been your twinflame after all, rather one of thoseall too fleeting human guides that help in just one stage of your life.

I do know its not a black and white affair but I cannot help thinking from the posts I read here that some twin flames , irrespective of the conviction from the proclaimer, may not after all prove to have been twin flames.

It is very much a matter of personal discernment.

My First Love preferred to share.. She clearly was NOT in retrospect the Love , The Twin Flame of Life, rather she was a Life Guide. A learning curve, a life Lesson.

I am frankly , very worried that those of you who have Twin Flames who are married to another are in some way mis reading the whole thing.

Just thinking allowed as ever.

Oh this is so true!! I have been experiencing this for the last 20 years of my life. I am married to a soulmate who is almost the other me. We really get along very well, we often know what the other one is going to say. There are a few slight differences in our vision of the world/the spiritual but we respect eachother's opinions.

A whole different story with my TF. He is my absolute opposite, in everything. But I noticed we share the same way of thinking, the same way of experiencing spirituality and there's a lot of telepathie between us. It really feels more like a "heavenly bond" while my marriage feels like an "earthy bond". Do you get what I mean? Both are as valuable but just different.

[twinkle77]

Originally Posted by Nymphea

Oh this is so true!! I have been experiencing this for the last 20 years of my life. I am married to a soulmate who is almost the other me. We really get along very well, we often know what the other one is going to say. There are a few slight differences in our vision of the world/the spiritual but we respect eachother's opinions.

A whole different story with my TF. He is my absolute opposite, in everything. But I noticed we share the same way of thinking, the same way of experiencing spirituality and there's a lot of telepathie between us. It really feels more like a "heavenly bond" while my marriage feels like an "earthy bond". Do you get what I mean? Both are as valuable but just different.

Same for me Nymphea..

What Xan said. Perfect.

But...

Originally Posted by Neville

As far as I understand.

A Soulmate is virtually another you. you gel in almost every way.

This, to me, can describe a harmonious soul mate.

A Twinflame is a kind of opposite number, A Fire to your Ice, A Chalk to your cheese.

I don't relate to this, though to be clear: I do not rule it out for others.

I have had the "opposite attract" type relationships, for sure. In fact, I went through a long string of them! It was as if they were tuning me, helping balance me, where I needed balancing. For example when I was too intuitive I gravitated towards and dated the guy who was Dr Spock rational.... and that relationship helped me reach a better balance. My DH is mostly a harmonious soul mate in that we gel in nearly every way -- but one. And it is that one characteristic we are exact opposites. The last 10 years together he's been balancing me and I've been balancing him, in this one particular area.

A twin flame will get you to expand and grow by inviting you to explore areas outside your comfort zones. And yes, this includes pushing your buttons sometimes.


Now ther is no acid test for twin flames as far as I am aware. Years prove that particular pudding . Two different people spend so long together that the twin flame relationship through a series of compromise on both sides begin to co alesce into a soul mate/ Anam Cara partnership.. because obviously the twin flame dynamic works in both directions.

Ah, see.. this is where I disagree with you. (Politely and civilly disagree!) DH and I have spent a long time together so we are growing into soul mates, because that is the one last frontier for us. But he is not my TF. I guess I'm saying from my own experience, you have this backwards. I relate to TF on the soul level first and foremost -- everything else seemed immaterial. We weren't evaluating each others' potential as life partners (shared finances, shared child rearing, shared interests, and all that stuff).

With DH we have been growing into the soul part of the connection -- because we totally gel on all the other, more "human" (for lack of better word) areas. Put it this way: He is my rock and I might be able to grind him down into sand to flow away in the water if we stay together long enough. Whereas TF and I related as ... the water, the flowing living water. Maybe because we're both like the water, we needed rocks to grind first? I haven't slept a wink tonight so I don't know if this analogy is any good.

If it cracks, and separation ensues, this is sugestive that the person you saw as your twin flame may not necessarily have been your twinflame after all, rather one of thoseall too fleeting human guides that help in just one stage of your life.

I do know its not a black and white affair but I cannot help thinking from the posts I read here that some twin flames , irrespective of the conviction from the proclaimer, may not after all prove to have been twin flames.

It is very much a matter of personal discernment.

My First Love preferred to share.. She clearly was NOT in retrospect the Love , The Twin Flame of Life, rather she was a Life Guide. A learning curve, a life Lesson.

Are you sure? How can you not be sure sharing is something you may grow to understand someday? How can you be sure that your next relationship won't bring you a lesson that will make you understand why she preferred to share?
Rhetorical question, and yes, I'm biased; you don't have to answer.

I am frankly , very worried that those of you who have Twin Flames who are married to another are in some way mis reading the whole thing.

Just thinking allowed as ever.

It happens; that does not rule out a TF connection.

Personally? If they are twin flames, after the initial infatuation/insanity grace period, very quickly they will not be able to lie and deceive anyone. Love with a capital L doesn't lie or deceive -- not even self (and wow that is the trickiest part of all, isn't it?). The one married will turn back to their marriage, and the one who's not married will encourage them to do just that. The marriage will either become better (which still does not rule out the TF connection) OR it'll collapse on its own accord. Or the doors will fling wide open... to make room for everyone.

LOL @ that post.

Squatchit's post I meant ^^

Speaking of posts. Xan. Talk to me about cosmic sex please.

[veronicax]

Originally Posted by Squatchit

I've been quietly concerned about this too...but have kept my trap shut.

Mainly because I may as well be talking to a brick wall. From what I read, a lot of the "twinflame brigade" are so entrenched in their belief, so soaked in it, they can't see past the love hearts and tears in their eyes.

And if one dares to speak up, there's a high risk of being shot down in (twin) flames...hahahahha. Because if one doesn't have the experience of a twinflame, then one has absolutely no idea what one is talking about, so why doesn't one jolly well bugger off. Talk about defensive.

It's madness, I tell you, madness!!!

I don't think it matters if a TF is married or not (mine actually is)..

However, this still does not mean that my relationship with him is not
"morally wrong" !!

I believe in my situation him being married is a distancing method for something I am almost ready for but not completely. I do not think he will stay married to this person and you could say I should distance myself but I honestly feel if he leaves that relationship it will be on it's own cord.

I will love him and be with him if he is married, single, gay, in the spirit world, becomes a junkie or a clown. Its just not about labels and status that has no real bearing on a connection.

Marriage is a man made institution that really has nothing to do with stopping spiritual connections. That's like saying your husband is your best friend so now you won't meet and make any girl best friends. Anything can happen !!

[Xan]

Originally Posted by Tinks

Speaking of posts. Xan. Talk to me about cosmic sex please.

Tinks, there are a few threads on the forum about spiritual and/or astral sex.

Here's a good one: Soul to Soul Sexual Connections - http://www.spiritualforums.com/vb/showthread.php?t=25773

and another: Sex with your soul mate/tf - http://www.spiritualforums.com/vb/sh...ad.php?t=22954


Xan

Originally Posted by veronicax

I don't think it matters if a TF is married or not (mine actually is)..

However, this still does not mean that my relationship with him is not
"morally wrong" !!

I believe in my situation him being married is a distancing method for something I am almost ready for but not completely. I do not think he will stay married to this person and you could say I should distance myself but I honestly feel if he leaves that relationship it will be on it's own cord.

I will love him and be with him if he is married, single, gay, in the spirit world, becomes a junkie or a clown. Its just not about labels and status that has no real bearing on a connection.

Marriage is a man made institution that really has nothing to do with stopping spiritual connections. That's like saying your husband is your best friend so now you won't meet and make any girl best friends. Anything can happen !!

I agree; marriage is just human made, totally irrespective of spiritual connections...At 29, I am finally looking to get married- to someone who earns well, good at heart, and can support me...And, I am not expecting it to be a soul connection as it is rare in itself...