Teenage stuff...

Yeah, so, I can't believe I'm doing this and stepping over my (huge) pride, but I need some advice...
So, I'll go straight to the subject: I am in love with some dude that doesn't like me back hehehe. I've liked (I'll say "like" because "love" sound way too advanced for what adults think about teenage-love) him since a while now, and he's kinda figured it out and keeps distance, and that's what I do too. A friend of mine said that it might be just my imagination that he's being distant, but I don't really think so, he's not the kind of guy that wouldn't talk to me if he wanted to...But that's not the thing, I'm used to the idea now and it's alright. The thing is that he's an indigo-atheist. And he knows only about the "atheist" part. I've seen his aura today hehehe. And that's why he finds me childish, because I believe in these kind of stuff...The question is: is there anything to do about it, I mean, making him notice what he is, or should I just stay at my place and not do anything? And is there any way we could make up somehow? In a friendly way, I mean.
Thanks for taking your time and reading this idiot thing hehehe :))

[astralsuzy]

I would not try to make him notice what he is. Just be friendly. You have a long way to go. You are only 14. Do not worry about things. Go out with your friends and have fun.

I say try not to let it worry you, he'll be himself regardless of whether he knows who/what he is or not. Labels don't change a thing,

Just be yourself. Enjoy life and all that jazz. Plenty of time to think seriously about spirituality and relationships later on.

He will either come to know himself eventually or choose to stay in the dark. We can never make people awaken, it has to be their own choice. I'm sure you're right that he thinks you a flighty teen girl, but over time, trust me, it changes. :) This is just the beginning of a long road of love :)

Alright, thanks everyone, I'll go with your advice guys

[John32241]

Hi,

I like the term indigo-atheist. It reflects a lot about this generation.

As a guy I have a somewhat different perspective about young people's relationships. I see them as substantially undervalued in our culture. The long term love based relationships evolve from quality encounters just like the one you have described.

Now to answer your question. When you get him to listen to what you are inclined to speak to him about, the relationship will shift in the way that you wish it to. You do that by nicely probing his logical defensive thinking. Ask questions that are designed to get him to talk with you about his views. When you listen to him very carefully, you will be guided on ways to encourage his listening potentials. I call this sort of thing "practicing telepathy". A great deal of mutual respect can be built at the subconscious level with this type of approach. Be authentic with him in a kind and encouraging way.

Best Wishes!!
John

You should say what you feel. Although we may seem ancient (LOL!!!) many of us can still remember how potent our teenaged loves were. Ditch the notion that your inquiry is idiotic. It isn’t.

It’s fairly normal for us to be smitten w/ those who may not feel the same way. Happens all the time, even at a much older age. KNOW that you will find someone who feels the same way about you. It may not be this guy, but it will happen.

It is never wise to try to force a relationship w/ someone who is just lukewarm about it as it is dubious it will be long lasting or even satisfying short term. They will never really be into it, so don’t waste your time. We can be putting in an ordinate amount of time trying to make a relationship that is never going to work any better than it does at the moment & miss the opportunity to connect w/ someone w/ whom this would be delightfully effortless.

Have fun. Date allot of guys. Don’t worry about being serious for quite some time. The less focused we are on HAVING to find a meaningful relationship, the better chance we have at finding it. Guys often find needy women unappealing. This neediness isn’t any more appealing when it is w/ men!

Don’t worry about finding a boyfriend who is in lockstep w/ your beliefs.

True Mattie! The man I'm going to marry in 38 days was a skeptic when I met him LOL. People change :)

from the perspective of a mum of teenage boys (twins that are 15)- teenage boys are very into themselves and really into hanging out with their mates, they are also very nervous, shy, and awkward around girls too, so hang in there he is prob just "being a guy" and needs to feel confident in himself before getting to know you better, good luck with him and hope he is worth it!!

Thank you. Well, hopefully I'll get him to listen to me, but the last time I tried to talk to him about this stuff, he said it was childish hehehe. The thing is that I can't tell him anything if we don't even talk, and now anything I would try to do will seem as if "trying to get him", when in reality, I just want to help him, because I don't think he's quite sure about his belief. I mean, he's got a lot of evidence, and he's read a lot about it, but he just skips to another thing, as he was agnosticist before...A friend of his said she thinks he isn't even sure...Well, at least there are people that think teen loves aren't just "foolish games". But, yeah, I'll see how things work out, I don't wanna make a big deal out of it, I just wanna get him to know me for good, and I don't know how.