Is there something wrong with me?

[Baile]

Originally Posted by WabiSabi

So my issue then is a matter of not knowing what I want to do.

That can be a good thing, you're open to anything so anything can happen. Also, spirit does intervene at times. I had a visit from someone - a voice in the room - who spoke and told me what I needed to do with my life. He was very specific. And I went and did exactly what he said. And it lead to a 20-year career in a very fulfilling occupation. So that happens too when you least expect it. Higher Self guidance is real... it has been for me anyway.

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by WabiSabi

I agree. But I don't know how. Haha, I feel so helpless right now.

You can do as I'm doing which provides temporary satisfaction by saying that it wasn't the 'real thing' because the 'real thing' wouldn't leave us in such a confused state and go from there.

What we have experienced is called 'savikalpa samadhi' or in Buddhist terms, 'Satori' - it's the precursor to full enlightenment.

The next step is nirvikalpa samadhi and I bet that when that is achieved, none of this is even going to matter.

When I get down, I concentrate on my philosophy which sorta goes 'not this' and I move on.

I still have to get myself into a daily ritual though and me saying 'I don't know how' sounds like the biggest cop out there is (I've tried that one too).

[H:O:R:A:C:E]

Originally Posted by WabiSabi

And yes, I do feel as though my experience has imprisoned me. How do I use it to expand? Do you have some advice?

your experience informs you that feeling imprisoned is not desired.
perceive your intentions for yourself.
remember that prior to enacting creation, you have intended to
benefit from experiencing creation.
you, as Source, intend, and have always intended benevolence.
experience remembrance of yourself.
you are free. you are free because you do not will to be imprisoned.