Turned Off by Tone

[Xan]

I agree... mostly people aren't choosing what they feel.

That doesn't mean we can't, though, once we become aware enough.

My son hurt his knee and can't go snowboarding for some time, and he felt very sad. Then he decided he didn't want to keep on hanging out in the bummed out feeling of loss, and choose to get into the exciting feeling of healing his knee instead.


Xan

Originally Posted by Gem

It's just the same as what I was saying, people go through their experiences which invalidates some belief or other so thay can't believe it any longer.

Are you saying if you can't choose, no one else can either?

[Gem]

Originally Posted by Xan

I agree... mostly people aren't choosing what they feel.

That doesn't mean we can't, though, once we become aware enough.

My son hurt his knee and can't go snowboarding for some time, and he felt very sad. Then he decided he didn't want to keep on hanging out in the bummed out feeling of loss, and choose to get into the exciting feeling of healing his knee instead.


Xan

Really, coz breaking a knee is a bummer, so it feels **** for a while, but then since it's the way it is you just make the most of the situation as it is.

in your theory he would have to choose to bust his knee in the first place wouldn't he?

Originally Posted by Xan

I agree... mostly people aren't choosing what they feel.

That doesn't mean we can't, though, once we become aware enough.

My son hurt his knee and can't go snowboarding for some time, and he felt very sad. Then he decided he didn't want to keep on hanging out in the bummed out feeling of loss, and choose to get into the exciting feeling of healing his knee instead.


Xan

Each person grieves differently.......so I suspect it comes back to the experience itself that one is going through, the depth of connected pain body associated with it.....as an example "loss". If people havent made peace with past pain, then current feelings will take longer to process and will often linger and fuel current experiences.... If one is open and feeling, has released the past pain associated with all the connections of pain..their is a greater chance of reaching a clearer channel of feeling, letting go...in the moment.

I dont see that space as a choice until the awarness and feelings have been fully addressed at the core......We may heal a current issue, feel we have faced it fully, but then find ourselves going down the same path, repeating the same pattern......whats holding that in place I wonder?

[Gem]

Originally Posted by silent whisper

Each person grieves differently.......so I suspect it comes back to the experience itself that one is going through, the depth of connected pain body associated with it.....as an example "loss". If people havent made peace with past pain, then current feelings will take longer to process and will often linger and fuel current experiences.... If one is open and feeling, has released the past pain associated with all the connections of pain..their is a greater chance of reaching a clearer channel of feeling, letting go...in the moment.

I dont see that space as a choice until the awarness and feelings have been fully addressed at the core......We may heal a current issue, feel we have faced it fully, but then find ourselves going down the same path, repeating the same pattern......whats holding that in place I wonder?

oh don't worry, xan knows the answer to that. then again, maybe you do too.

[Xan]

Originally Posted by Gem

in your theory he would have to choose to bust his knee in the first place wouldn't he?

You must be thinking of someone else, Gem, 'cause I never held that sort of theory.

I said emotional mastery means you accept whatever you feel, then make a new choice if you wish.

All feelings are in you, so which do you prefer to feel now?


Xan

Originally Posted by Humm

Humm and I did what?

Went on a camping holiday.
Ate burritos till we saw god.
Joined a bridge club.
Sent each other valentine's day cards.
Jumped to conclusions.

Nah, we had a rational discussion about the Beatles line from their song.

[Xan]

...we had a rational discussion about the Beatles line from their song.

But isn't that sort of cold?


Xan

Originally Posted by Xan

You must be thinking of someone else, Gem, 'cause I never held that sort of theory.

I said emotional mastery means you accept whatever you feel, then make a new choice if you wish.

All feelings are in you, so which do you prefer to feel now?


Xan

I dont like the way this choice things sits with me...but then I am only using myself as an example here. To me feelings are like the ocean, a living moving ebb and flow. If one is grieving, just allowing the release to flow in their own time and processing. Allowing the upswell of joy to grow deeper into that space with that flow..In time the core (joy) is naturally present and we find centre naturally...I dont really make it a conscious choice, but then maybe some need too to avoid feeling it all fully...like a natural inbuilt protective layer...

Originally Posted by Xan

Why? For sharing a different view... for the sake of flexibility... for sharing from a variety of our aspects in one interaction... for fun.

So you can do all those things but not have a rational discussion about it.
each to their own Xan.