Is he my twin flame?

I have to agree with everyone else....if he is treating you that way, it is definitely not a TF relationship!
I also agree that he may be a soul connection that you have unfinished karma with.....but that is something else again...
Sorry, just my opinion, as well....

Originally Posted by catatonic

yeah sometimes i feel that he's a jerk, but what can i say...i really love him.
and i feel deeply connected with him, when he is sick...usually i can feel his sickness, and he can always know if i am sick although i didn't tell him anything.

i am the one who confessed to him about my feelings and i asked him to be my bf, i was so happy when he said yes. i hope that if i date him, he will be nicer and romantic, but he's still the same, just like when we're only a friend. talking about how cute is Sally or how hot is Eve, etc with me, but he's never say that i'm cute. he's never reply my text messages and he never call me on the phone, i always be the one who text him and call him first.

and we're friend before we're dating. it will be so hard for me if i break up with him, because i love him so much and we have the same circle of friends, i will always see him everyday.

It seems to me he is just using you and that is the lowest thing a man can do, you deserve so much better. So I would suggest you kick him out and stop being used as a door mat. Who knows it may even bring him to his senses, though I wouldn't like to bet on it. It is people like him that give men a bad name. It is only you who can do it, it wont be easy but nothing is that is worth while. As they say, no pain no gain.

[Teal]

I would cut him lose. Go back to friends.

[aero87]

Originally Posted by catatonic

yeah sometimes i feel that he's a jerk, but what can i say...i really love him.
and i feel deeply connected with him, when he is sick...usually i can feel his sickness, and he can always know if i am sick although i didn't tell him anything.

i am the one who confessed to him about my feelings and i asked him to be my bf, i was so happy when he said yes. i hope that if i date him, he will be nicer and romantic, but he's still the same, just like when we're only a friend. talking about how cute is Sally or how hot is Eve, etc with me, but he's never say that i'm cute. he's never reply my text messages and he never call me on the phone, i always be the one who text him and call him first.

and we're friend before we're dating. it will be so hard for me if i break up with him, because i love him so much and we have the same circle of friends, i will always see him everyday.

Yeah my only advise for you is to run away from this guy. No one deserves to be in a relationship like this or to be treated like this.

I talked to him last night, i asked him what do you want from me? what can i do to make you love me like i do?
But he was only smile and handed me another little bear doll, after that he walked away.
Sigh... i don't want to lose him, i've never love anyone like i love him.

[immortal coil]

"If you love something, let it go, if it comes back to you, it is yours."

Best advice I can give you in this situation since it seems like you're not getting the support you need.

I have been doing some research on TF's because I believe the relationship I am in now that he is mine (I will share more later) but what you are experiencing (IN MY OPINION which doesn't need to matter to squat because you are the only real one who can answer this) is what is called a 'karmic relationship' not a TF. A twin flame goes through stages and I briefly listed them below to help give you an idea. BTW I was married TWICE to two men just like your ex boyfriend, see him as a gift, a karmic debt paid, learn the lesson meant and stay steadfast that the 'universe' higher self etc will lead you to your TF and you will know without a doubt and it takes time.

RARELY do we recognize our TF right off the bat, not in my experience. I am engaged to a man after being together three years and we experienced every phase. We are now between phase 3 and 4 but pushing more towards the 4th stage. I just RECENTLY recognized him and he did me as our TF through much thought and deliberation etc:

Here are the 'phases' although yes they do vary...hope this helps

Phase One – The Preparation
This phase comes BEFORE you meet your twinflame.
But I’m counting it as one of the phases as It is very much a part of your Twinflame relationship.

What happens in this phase -

- Karmic Relationships
There are one or few seriously devastating relationships. These begin with strong emotions and end painfully. These are called Karmic relationships.

– Emptiness and Strong desire for ‘The One’
After you’ve been through the Karmic relationships, you’ll have a very deep yearning or desire to find ‘The One’.
At this point you will desire meeting your perfect love, whose image you will carry in your imagination (or in some cases in Dreams).
This Image is of your Twinflame, although you probably won’t realize it at this point.
This happens because your soul knows your Twinflame is coming!

Phase Two – The Meeting – A Glimpse Of Heaven

This is the phase when you meet your twinflame for the first time (in this incarnation).
You might try to resist at this point but you will fall for him/her anyway.
Then comes a short period of ‘perfection’.
This is what I like to call A Glimpse of Heaven

What happens In this Phase -

- The first meeting
You’ll meet your twinflame in unusual circumstances or at some unexpected place.
[A place where you would not expect meeting your life partner/soulmate]
You’ll find this person somehow ‘special’ at this point. Even though you might not even think of them as a partner.

– The initial attraction
You’ll soon find yourself being attracted to your twinflame.
You might not be ready for a relationship (because of the karmic relationships that you’ve been through) and so you might try to resist this attraction.
You’ll fall anyway. Deeply in love.

– A short period of the most ‘Perfect’ relationship that you’ve ever experienced.
After the initial attraction, You’ll find yourself in a deeply romantic relationship.
It will seem perfect in every possible way.
You’ll find all that you want in your partner and much more.

This is what the Twinflame relationship is actually supposed to be like.
And this is what it becomes ( if not better ) after you get through the problems that surface in the next phase.
This short period makes you aware of the perfection of yourself and your twinflame nd brings back the memories that were always deep within you. This makes you want to go through the next phase ( which is a little tough ).
Its like a trailer for what your relationship is going to be in phase four, after the reunion.

Phase three – The Dance – Resolving what is known as the Karma

This is the tough one.
It starts after you’ve been in a relationship with your twinflame for a while.
In this phase, all the accumulated negativity and lower emotions come to surface.
This seems difficult to go through at the human level,
but it is actually a truly divine process in which the Twinflames get deeply cleansed with each other’s help.
This lets them achieve higher energy levels so that they can ascend in bliss together.

This is also the phase where both twinflames get spiritually enlightened…
This is when they search and find the spiritual reality.
If you’re currently in a Twinflame relationship, you’re probably in this phase (As This is the period of time when you usually begin finding information on this).

What Happens in this Phase -

– Arguments / Fights
This phase brings many arguments and fights.
This happens because the negativity that each partner is carrying within (usually at a subconscious level) comes to surface.
The twinflame will reflect this like a mirror and so you’ll think its in them, when in reality its in you.
This begins the deep cleansing process.

- The blame game
Each twinflame sees their own negativity and clutter in their twinflame.
Also, deep seated fears and frustrations surface.
So you think Its happening because of the other and start blaming each other.
You consciously might not realize it but this is clearing all your clutter which is a good thing.

– The runner and the Chaser.
The arguments and the Blaming causes a lot of confusion (because usually the spiritual process is not understood by the conscious mind, as we are conditioned to trust logic more that feeling)

One twinflame, at this point, takes the role of the ‘Runner’ (which is usually the man)
The Runner tries to avoid the partner and runaway from the relationship.
This happens because the runner doesn’t consciously know what is going on and feels like he’s losing control.

The other twinflame, now, becomes what I call the ‘Chaser’ (usually the woman)
The Chaser is spiritually more aware than the runner at some level and tries to ‘chase’ or ‘run after’ the runner.
The chaser usually wants some sort of commitment at this point. This happens as the chaser subconsciously or consciously wants to get over with this tough phase so that both of them can reunite.

The Chaser is deeply shocked and hurt by the ‘running’ and unexpected behavior of the Runner.
This is when they feel the need to understand what really is happening and so they start searching or reading about it.
This usually leads to the enlightenment of the Chaser.

The Runner becomes spiritually enlightened too, either through the chaser’s conscious effort, Or by receiving a ‘Soul Shock’ when the Chaser gives up and goes away from the Runner Twinflame.

The Phase gets stretched longer the more the Runner runs.
Ultimately, the runner does return and the Karma is finally fully resolved.

Phase Four – The Reunion

This is the phase of the reunion.
This is when the split soul becomes One again.
This happens first at the level of the soul and then in the physical plane (Yes, that’s when you get married, unless, as in rare cases your physical reunion is not a part of the plan)

The reunion happens when both the partners are fully aware of the spiritual reality.

Phase Five – Eternal Bliss – Being LOVE

This is the ‘Happily Ever After’ Phase.
Both Twinflames will be fully spiritually aware and enlightened at this time.
There is perfect love and harmony.
The twinflames now enjoy their Sacred love and Intimacy,
and have the power to create whatever they can imagine…

The world truly becomes their canvas… And they paint it with the colors of Love.

At the end of their journey on Earth, They ascend together…
And go on to experience more…
just like they always have…
In other worlds and other planets… In this universe and beyond…
Together, In love, joy, and Peace
Together, In Eternal Bliss…

thanks for your explanation, metarealityseeker.

i hope i'm on the phase three now, i don't know how long i can be patient with him.

thanks everyone, i will always tell you the updates.
i really love him...

Originally Posted by catatonic

yeah sometimes i feel that he's a jerk, but what can i say...i really love him.
and i feel deeply connected with him, when he is sick...usually i can feel his sickness, and he can always know if i am sick although i didn't tell him anything.

i am the one who confessed to him about my feelings and i asked him to be my bf, i was so happy when he said yes. i hope that if i date him, he will be nicer and romantic, but he's still the same, just like when we're only a friend. talking about how cute is Sally or how hot is Eve, etc with me, but he's never say that i'm cute. he's never reply my text messages and he never call me on the phone, i always be the one who text him and call him first.

and we're friend before we're dating. it will be so hard for me if i break up with him, because i love him so much and we have the same circle of friends, i will always see him everyday.

---------
I think i understand when you say 'he is a jerk but i still love him'..bcoz i am in asimilar situation.But in my case he wanted me to be his gf.and denies he has any other girl- But i know he has many gf and believe me it doesnt affect my love for him at all. I love him not only as a bf but in many other ways too..TRULY I FEEL THE "CONNECTION"Which i never felt with anyone else untill now.Its really disturbing at times.-But its too late because i am already commited so i never told him i have love feelings for him.But deep in my heart i really love him but i dont want to do anything wrong.So i hoped if i ignore his love feelings and stressed on platonic friendship may b he will adjust to that fact.But ever since i said no to being his girl he stopped calling and very rarely answered my texts.Whenever he did it was always another try to make me say YES.but i never said it.but i confess at times my feelings were shown and he knows that..I kept texting himfor a year he replied sometimes and told me to go away becoz he is not good for me.But i ignored it and kept texting. On new year dayWhen i greeted him he texted me that he was going to be married and doesnt want to see my number again..he even called our common friend and told her that am disturbing him amd forcing him to have secret affair with me.Two days before that he tried to tell he doesnt have any gf and when i teased him i saw him with another(not true hehe)thats when he got angry.
Believe me i am very happy he will be settled in life..because i truly love him and with or without me -i want him to be happy.But he doesnt understand that.To me he is like a small child sometimes..i cant even think of him being sad..It hurts me a lot.But now,five months afer our 'break up',he still tries to get a good look at me when i go out -without making it obvious.I only want us to be in talking terms but he is not ready to do that-he says he cant even say hello to me if i cant be his gf.When i ask the reason he says he doesnt know y.May be i am stupid -but there's not a single day i have nt thought of him..almost 24 hrs.he is in my mind.I tried to forget him..but its no use.we have no contact and we dont see each other often.

But some times when am actually thinking of something else..suddenly his face flashes in front of my eyes!Its like a shock n i feel very disturbed..In fact the times when i try to think of him i cant get his picture in my mind-but i dont understand y it happens!I dont think its right for me to text him again but am worried bcoz i know he has bad habits too..may be he is in some trouble..sick.. or may be he is thinking of me??But whatever i leave it to God to handle..
I think if twin falme he will come back- so give it some time and try to distance yourself from him and at least show that you r with someone else..I think if he finds that he is going to lose you it will bring out his feelings if there's any..From what i know going behind a guy and throwing yourself at their feet will only reduce your value in their eyes..Gd luck!

thanks for sharing yours, dolop.

Originally Posted by dolop

I think if twin falme he will come back- so give it some time and try to distance yourself from him and at least show that you r with someone else..I think if he finds that he is going to lose you it will bring out his feelings if there's any..From what i know going behind a guy and throwing yourself at their feet will only reduce your value in their eyes..Gd luck!

Actually there are some guys trying to hitting on me.
I always tell him about those guys, i do that because i want to show him that there's no secret i hide from him because i truly madly deeply in love with him, i want to show that although many guys approaching me, he's always be my number one.

He never said that he's jealous, he'll be just silent and try to talk about something else. I can feel that actually he's jealous and insecure. I feel bad when he get jealous, but i want to be 100% honest with him.

I know --actually i wish-- he loves me too, but why he can't treat me properly. I just want him to say "I love you too", i want to be like other normal couples -- celebrate the valentine day, anniversary day, our birthday --
He even never say happy birthday on my birthday.