Why do you believe your connection is running?

It makes sense, two runners.For me my beloved distanced himself from me. He hurt me and I doubted his love. I ended things with him hurting him and made him doubt me. We both ran, we both doubted each other and put blame on the other. Instead we should have just believed in each other, ourselves and look to our own issues and inner demons.

Originally Posted by airydoug

My SC does the same. She loses herself around me, but she acknowledges it so it's easy for her to come out of it. Some days are weird and some she's her confident self, and my confidence drops when she's her confident self. Rofl, it's not me that has that affect on her. It's the intensity of our connection.

And that's just it. It isn't anything she does. It's the energy I feel. When I think about how it must have been for her to try so hard to talk to someone whose eyes are rolling back in their head..."la la I'm in LA LA land, wheee, don't know what you're saying to me so can't answer your questions..."

I feel so bad. What's it like to be on the receiving end? I mean she was always giving me this look that seemed to say, "Are you being silly or should I call an ambulance for you?"

Originally Posted by BeautifulLife

First off if you have truly met your tf then there is no duality and therefore you CAN'T have a stayer and a runner. If you are truly TFs than you are either together or both running and most likely your running from yourself not a love that is so powerful you can't handle it. Saying that they are running from you because they can't handle the love that exists between you two just screams EGO in my opinion vs. intuition.

Have you ever been madly in love with someone and been able to keep away let alone for a long time especially if you know the other person is INTERESTED in being with you? Look how many people on these forums can't keep away even with being constantly rejected by their so called "TF" yet even that doesn't keep them from giving up hope or remaining available. Christ I broke things off with my wife after 13yrs of being together the second my so called TF told me that she "still feels something for me" after denying it for nearly 6yrs. All it took was an indication that there was a chance for us and I was willing to completely rearrange my entire life for the unknown never mind having to break the heart of my wife who I had just married.

The only thing that would keep you away is thinking they wanted nothing to do with you and even than you'd probably crash and burn numerous times TRYING (I sure did) before you'd take their word that they wanted nothing to do with you.

Love is the most powerful force in the universe and if love truly does resides in your heart for someone I find it pretty hard to believe that fear could stop you for very long let alone for years, decades or a lifetime.

Thing is, she thinks I my feelings for her would change if I knew something specific about her. She doesn't know that I already know and it doesn't change the way I feel about her.

I too rearranged my life once she was "serious" about us. I finally ended my 10 year horrible marriage shortly after connection and i were physical for the first time. She is still with her husband but plans on leaving. When, who knows. I think she is hesitant on going "all in" with me because like i said, she thinks I won't accept something about her.

Next time we have alone time, I'm gonna let her know everything is fine even though I really rather she just find the courage to tell me herself.

[Teal]

You know I found out something about my dude that would surprise others. so I do not say anything about it. Its in the vault. The thing is it makes sense that there may be something different or tabooish or just something we just aren't.
proud of.

The thing to remember is she is coming into this now. Her thought process may not be where yours is. She hasn't came across that no matter what we accept the tf in all its glory and I think if you laid all your cards out(maybe you have a few things in the vault you could share with her??? Maybe let her digest that. see what happens.

Originally Posted by tealtwist

You know I found out something about my dude that would surprise others. so I do not say anything about it. Its in the vault. The thing is it makes sense that there may be something different or tabooish or just something we just aren't.
proud of.

The thing to remember is she is coming into this now. Her thought process may not be where yours is. She hasn't came across that no matter what we accept the tf in all its glory and I think if you laid all your cards out(maybe you have a few things in the vault you could share with her??? Maybe let her digest that. see what happens.

Good point, I will definitely consider this.

[Kiwigirl11]

I love this lady ....love all her articles ...there is a few about runners,so thought i would share here .....if this link doesn't work just look up Jean Green soul connections


http://jeangreen.net/?p=79

I'm 'running' because my twin went nuts. They stalked me to a specific forum and created rambling posts about how their ex was threatening them. This <bothered> me, but they also made a variety of other accounts where they provoked as many people as they could and got themselves banned. The final straw was when I was told BY THE PEOPLE THEY HAD PRIVATE MESSAGED (as if they weren't going to tell me)thatthey were claiming I was their ex. I don't know if I can trust them anymore and certainly won't put up with the streams of <stuff>. Has anybody had their twin do something equally loathsome?

Edited by SF Staff

[sunflwrdanzr]

I know he runs because when I first met him...I ran. Honestly in our case we need this separation. I know it's been the best thing for me, needed to happen and awaken me and he has said he's noticed that in me, while he's just now getting to a point of working on him and figuring out some things in general. And that's fine. What's meant to be will be. There's still a pull, a coming back from both of us always and like some one said, stare downs, connected moments. I like what teal said "To be continued..." Not running necessarily. Getting all our parts lined up, caught up, in order. We're just on the cliffhanger waiting to see what's in the next chapter.

Originally Posted by Spirit25

It makes sense, two runners.For me my beloved distanced himself from me. He hurt me and I doubted his love. I ended things with him hurting him and made him doubt me. We both ran, we both doubted each other and put blame on the other. Instead we should have just believed in each other, ourselves and look to our own issues and inner demons.

I relate so much to this. Are you in contact anymore?

[Sarian]

I guess I don't understand anyone running because of the intensity. The intensity is what made me stay, what broke my heart and drove me nuts that I might never be with him. Something inside me kept me there and wait and during his hard time, he never left me 100 percent though. The intensity is still amazing. I went through a period just this year where I sort of felt afraid to get closer than we already are....I started thinking I wanted freedom, but actually, all that was was fear. I had only been divorced less than a year (will be a year in latter part of May)...but after all these years, and all these years of pushing and pulling and trying to let go and yet instead of running from each other, we ran towards each other because we couldn't stand to be apart... like a tornado came up and took us up into it, mixed us together and I don't know...the love is even more intense even after knowing him as long as I have. He has been professing a love for me like never before. It's like we are burning stronger than I could ever have imagined, so again, I don't understand why the intensity would scare anyone off. I find it incredible and beautiful and now that we are where we are, I can say the pain to get here was worth it.